what i want but cant have!!

my name is Joyce Tomlinson, recognise the last name, yeah I am Louis Tomlinson’s younger sister. Im turning 16 in about 2 months I have to live with 5 boys and 1 being my brother that I hate, okay I don’t really hate him but im just really annoyed with him he hasn’t spoken to me in a year and a half and now he wants me to move in with him. But there is a problem I like someone but I know they don’t like me back, but only like me as a sister figure, great.
Read to find out what happens.


8. the start off tour

liam's P.O.V.

i wake up to the sun shining brightly into the room, i feel next to me and find joyce isn't there, i slowly sit up so i dont make myself dissy.

after i managed to get myself up properly i walk out of joy's bedroom and walk towards the kitchen to see her making eggs and bacon for breakfast, i smile at her and walk over to her, once i reach her i wrap my arms aroung her waist from the back and kiss her cheekbefore resting my ead on her shoulder

"morning beautiful" i say

"morning handsome" she says, while putting the food on plates. i walk over to the fridge and get apple juice out for joyce and orange for me, i walk over and put them on the table before going to get two cups, i fill the cups up and put the juices back in the fridge, bye this point in time joyce had just put our food down and sat down to eat hers, i join her and we eat in silence.


after we have finished with breakfast and washing the dishes we go and take a seat on the couch turning the TV on and it comes straight up onto the music channel.


Joyce's P.O.V.

We had just finished washing up from breakfast and now me and li are sitting in our living room watching the music channel.

"Li?" i ask

"yeah, whats up babe?" he says back to me

"how long are we gonna keep 'us' a secret?" i answer with another question

"i dont know babe but you know we cant let your brother find out remember" he replies back to me

"yeah i know but i dont want to keep it a secret anymore, i want everyone to know i love you" i say back to him looking down at my lap where my hands lay, not long after i say that i feel liam put his hands over the top of mine.

"babe i know i feel the same way, but if louis finds out he will kill the both of us, you know how protective he is of you" li replies, i just nod not wanting to talk about it anymore, all of a sudden i feel my self get hoistes up and im now sitting on Li's lap facing him. i look up and see him smiling at me.

"oh yeah i almost forgot, i know what to get niall to keep his mouth shut about us!" i say giggiling as im thinking bout what to get him.

"what?" liam asks me

i start laughing " nandos" i say quiet enoug so niall actually doesnt here us and come in here catching us again

"yeah that will work" he rplies laughing with me

"yeah we will get him 2 days worth of it so he definetly keps his mouth shut" i just finsh as my phone starts rining from my bedroom, i qickly jump off liam and run to my room to see who's calling, i pick the phone up to see mum calling me, i quickly press the green button and put it to my ear.

"hi mum"

"hey darling, um im calling to tell you i've put money into your bank and that stacey is going to join you sometime through the tour too"

"oh okay thanks for the money, but why is she what about her fiance" i say back

"oh he is actually helping out the band for one direction, so thats why she is going"

"okay then, call me when she is gonna join us" i sigh

"i will,love you and tell your broether i lovve him and givve him a kiss for me okay bye darling" she says

"yeah sure mum love you too bye" i say and then hang up

i walk to my door and call for liam he is soon right in front of me

"whats up babe?" he asks

"nothing im just gonna have a shwer and get changed so dont come into the bathroom k!?" i say collecting the stuff i need before walking into the bathroom.

"sure babe, i'll just be whatching wrestling" he says

"alright love you" i say

"love you too" he says giving me a kiss then walking back to the lounge room.

i close the door cause unforunatly it doesnt have a lock on it cause its broken and i dont know how, i walk over to the shower and turn it on before stripping down and getting into the hot steaming shower.

i wash my hair and shave my legs then get out and put my undergarments on, i look in the mirror and smile down at my hip where my panty line is. if your wondering why? well i have a cute little butterfly tattoo.                      (this is it!)

and if lou or mum ever find out about this im going to be in so much trouble, i would probably be dead if they found out i had this, plues stacey would be killed as well as me cause she was the one who took me to get it and only her and her fiance know i have it. there is one other person that know i have it but im not going to think about him or that cause i'll get really upset agian.

((this is here outfit))

i quickly shake those thoughts out of my mind and grab my clothes and put them on, after that partly dry my hair with the towel and leve it down to let it do its own thing i walk out of the bathroom and go straight to the lounge room to see that only liam is in here 'yes!' my thoughts were.

I walk over to him and sit on his lap facing him,  he imediatly looks at me and smiles

"did you have a nice shower?" he asked

"duh.... showers are always the best" i sass, he laughs and shakes his head, i pout my lips acting like a little child while crossing my arms oveer my chest, he soon stops laughing and looks at me.

I keep my pouty face on and look at liam, he just smiles at me and presses his lips to mine, as soon as our lips connect i start to smile into it wrapping my arms around his neck and him holding me around the waist we continue to make out for about 5 minutes than pull away out of breath.

i smile at him and he smiles back at me. we saty in this postion just talking to each other about how we are gonna keep this a secret while on the road.

******* 3 hours later********

its now 1:00pm and we  are leavin in half an hour, louis has just told me and liam to get our bags and go put them in the van outside thats waiting for us. i quickly run a head of liam pushhing him slightly nad running into my room to get my luggage, as im walking out of my room with my 2 suitcases in my hands i see liam walk out of his not long after.

we both walk out of our apartment/room,and i go out the door going straight for the car

"hey, you must be joyce, right?" asked a man standing there

"yeah i am, um sorry but i didn't catch your name" i say to him, just as he was about to tell me his name niall came running out of the house screaming someones name

"PAUL, PAUL, PAUL, HYELP THERE IS NO FOOD LEFT IM STARVING!" Niall yells running over to the guy infront of me, which his name must be paul.

"as you heard my name is paul" he says laughing i laugh too and he grabbs my bags putting them in the van, ignoring nialls pleas for paul to get him food.

"hey niall me and liam have some left over food in our apartment" i say, niall gets the biggest gri n on his face

"can i go see what you have?" he asks in a baby voice, i laugh and grab his hand pulling him into mine and li's apartment and into the kitchen. he quickly runs to the fridge and brings sll the food out and starts eating it, i try to hold in a laugh but cant.

liam then walks through the kitchen door, i smile at him and he comes over and kisses me on the forehead

"okay niall, me and Liam have figured out what we are going to give you to keep your mouth shut about us okay!?" i say he nods still suffing his face

"well we are going to get you 2 days woth of nandos" i say, and as soon a i say 'nandos' his head soots up and he comes running at us and gives uss the biggest horan hugg ever.

okay if you havn't figured it out niall is like a brother to me, zayn is someone i can truly trust to tell anything to and harry is like my other brother who i can truly trust, where as liam is well......um i dont know how to describe him, i mean i love him but to everyone other than niall he is my big brother as well so yeah its kind of complicated. anyway

I link my arms in liam and nialls and lead them out tof the room to the car. as i step outside with the 2 boys linked arms with me louis turns around and see's me with them great!

"what are youse doing?" he asked

"where linking armas why lou" i asked, annoyance clearly in my voice, he give liam and niall death glare and thats when i crack, i hate how he does this

"ARE YOU SERIOUS ALL WE ARE DOING IS LINKING ARMS AND YOU GIVE THEM DEATH GLARES FOR NO REAL REASON, I HATE WHEN YOU DO THAT, I CAN DO WHAT I WANT WITHOUT YOUR PERMISSION AND THEY ARE JUST LIKE BROTHERS TO ME LOU, YOU KNOW IM STILL NOT FIT TO DATE AFTER WHAT HAPPENED WITH 'YOU KNOW WHO'!!!"  I yell at him really angry, but what he doesn't know is that i am ready to move on he just thinks im not and i keep telling him that to cover up me and liam.

i look and see all the boys mouths hanging open including lou's, they havn't heard me yell, well lou has but not this bad, all of a sudden i feel someone standing behind me rubbing my arms tryin to calm me down because i am currently  standing in front of louis about to punch him.

i calm down a few minutes late and turn around to see liam there i smile at him and give him a hug befor walking over to the car and getting in the back back of the car and sitting down doing my belt up, im soon joined by zayn who sits next to me with harry and liam sitting in the middle and louis sitting in the passenger seat.



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