what i want but cant have!!

my name is Joyce Tomlinson, recognise the last name, yeah I am Louis Tomlinson’s younger sister. Im turning 16 in about 2 months I have to live with 5 boys and 1 being my brother that I hate, okay I don’t really hate him but im just really annoyed with him he hasn’t spoken to me in a year and a half and now he wants me to move in with him. But there is a problem I like someone but I know they don’t like me back, but only like me as a sister figure, great.
Read to find out what happens.

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12. 'see me now' part 1

joyce's P.O.V.

My birthday party last night was amzing it ended up finishing at 2 in the morning and everyone went home except El and little mix.  'stacey, matilda, chloe, isabelle and jake' all went home, but will be joining us again soon.

I get out of bed smiling remebering everything about my birthday party last night and the events that went on early that morning with liam. i walk into my bathroom and get undressed and jump into the now  hot shower, i wash my hair and shave my legs than get out, I wrap a towel around my body then one around my hair, i walk into the room and go over to my suitcase on the floor, and yes i haven't unpacked yet, i cant be bothered, i grab some trackies and harry's jack wills hoodie that i had stolen from him about 3 weeks ago and he still hasn't found out i have taken it. i throw them on with a blue singlet underneath the hoodie.

I then let my hair out of the towel and dry it with the towel before i walk out into the hallway to see that all the doors are still closed which means they are all still asleep, i quietly walk back into my room closing the door and going over to my duffle bag and trying to find my ipod but instead i find my song book, 'i swear i did not bring this with me' i mumble to myself before shrugging it off and taking it to go sit on my bed before grabbing the guitar in my room, and yes i do play the guitar, i flick through the pages before i land on one that i wrote about 3 months ago before i had gone to 'visit' louis but ended up going on tour with him, i start strumming the guitar, and start singing when its time to come in

see me now

Uh-o-o-o-o
Uh-o-o-o-o
Uh-o-o-o-o

I feel the rain on my skin
Wash away all the pain I was in
I see the sun in the sky
No longer know how it feels to cry

And it really doesn't matter
So what? So what?
That I've been hesitating so long, so long
Somebody turn out the light
'Cause right now must be my time to shine

They said I couldn't, they told me that I wouldn't
But if they could see me now
They'd see I'm something, that I'm not scared of nothing
And the world will hear me shown
We say oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Might call me crazy
But I've been thinkin' maybe you would change your mind
If you could see me now

Drop me in the ocean, I'll swim
Put me in with the lions, I'll roar
There's a survivor within
So much stronger than I was before

They never saw me comin'
So what? So what?
'Cause they been sleepin' on me so long, so long
I'd gotta leave that behind
'Cause right now must be my time to shine

I START CRYING, REMEBERING EVERYTHING THAT HAD HAPPENED IN SCHOOL FOR YEARS BEFORE LOUIS EVEN BECAME FAMOUS.

They said I couldn't, they told me that I wouldn't
But if they could see me now
They'd see I'm something, that I'm not scared of nothing
And the world will hear me shown
We say oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Might call me crazy
But I've been thinkin' maybe you would change your mind
If you could see me now

They said I couldn't, they told me that I wouldn't
But if they could see me now
They'd see I'm something, that I'm not scared of nothing
And the world will hear me shown
(
I'm not scared of nothing!)

They said I couldn't, they told me that I wouldn't
But if they could see me now
They'd see I'm something, that I'm not scared of nothing
And the world will hear me shown
We say oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
Might call me crazy
But I've been thinkin' maybe you would change your mind
If you could see me now

(A/N : i know this is a little mix song, one of there new ones but in this story its not it joyces one she made up from scratch, because of bulling)

 

Im fully crying by the end of the song and i place the guitar down on the bed next to me, then putting my head into my hands and kept crying, about a minute or less later i heard clapping coming from my doorway, i look up to see everyone there, as soon as they see me crying, they all come rushing over to the bed and the girls are the ones to get here first before the boys, the girls give me a big group hug with the boys joining after

"uh... guys... girls.....cant.....breath" i say trying to get air, they all move away so i have room to breath

"why are you crying?" El asks

"dont worry" i say wipping the tears away, i give them all a smile, then look at liam, he's frowning at me, great he knows im not fine. my smile turns into a frown as i look down at my hands that are lying in my lap.

"sis?" lou asks

"just go away please, it was just a stupid little song" i say

"no it wasn't , that was one of the sweetest songs i've heard" liam says sitting down next to me on the bed.

"yeah" comes from everyone, i lift my head up to see huge smiles on their faces, i look up to liam who is sitting next to me

"thank you" i say leaning my head on his shoulder as he wraps his arms around my shoulders

"get your hands off my sister now!" lou yells at liam,'oh jesus crist!', liam imediatly takes his hands off me and stands up off the bed away from me, and in a matter of seconds lou is standing in front of him yelling at him, 'oh great, im going to regret this' i think to myself

"LOU!"...................................

 

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A/N

here is the next chapter hope you like it, comment what you think will happen, and if i should continue this book! part 2 will bw up soon i promis

like fave and comment if you think i should continue!

- tayla x

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