Safe And Sound (Triquel to Red)

"Elizabeth Ashton was more that just a girl to me. She was my best friend, she was the love of my life, she was my light. Since the day I met her when we were 5 years old there hasn't been a single day that I didn't love her. Without her, I wouldn't be the man I am today. She taught me so many things. She taught me to never give up on myself and to never let anyone tell me who I am, who I want to be. She taught me to believe in myself even when no one else did. Through the 15 years that I knew her, just the thought of her made me smile. Now I can't help but look back on all of the memories we made. The pillow fights, the sleep overs, the ghost stories. She made me happier than anyone else ever could. She put a smile on my face even when I was on the verge of tears and she always knew what to say. So much of the world knows Elizabeth Ashton as the girl who broke free from her past and created a future...

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3. Its My Fault

***Liam's POV***

I'm lost. I'm completely lost. Its almost like I'm in a maze and I can't find my way out. All of the sharp turns and dead ends have thrown me off my course and broken me. Since the moment I heard the shot fire, I hadn't been the same. A part of me died with her. The part that created the smiles and the laughs. The part that made the sun shine and the birds sing. The part that made happiness.

I've made a promise to myself. Not if. When I find her father... when I find Steven Ashton, I'm going to take everything from him. I'm going to take everything he ever cared about, everything that ever made him smile and I'm going to destroy it. Just like he did with me. I'm going to make him suffer the way Beth suffered. I'm going to make him feel the pain that she felt. I'm going to make him regret ever laying a finger on her. I'm going to make him regret it all. I made that promise to myself.

My body ached as I slipped out of the bed, the picture still in my firm grasp. I stopped for a moment, gazing at the photograph in my hand. I slowly laid it on the bedside table and stood up, my legs shaking. I slowly lumbered out of her room and down the stairs. Before I could reach the bottom I practically collapsed. I sat down swiftly on the stair, using the rail for support. I could feel myself shaking, trying to hold back the tears. I could feel my self slowly loosing itself. I could tell myself a thousand times that everything would be okay but every single one of those would be a lie. When you loose someone, you never really realize just how much they mean to you until they're actually gone. Its the moment that you finally realize that they're not coming back that you break. I had almost lost all hope when I heard the song coming from my phone. Someone was calling me... the song that was playing was Fall. Only one person had that ringtone. I swiftly took the phone out of my pocket and looked at the screen. Beth is calling... I quickly hit the answer button and put it to my ear.

"Hello?" I choked out.

No answer.

"Hello?" I asked again.

I sat there, the phone pressed to my ear hoping every second that I would hear her beautiful voice. I knew it wasn't possible though. As of January 16, Elizabeth Ashton was dead. And dead people don't come back to life, no matter how many times you wish on a shooting star or throw a penny into a fountain. They're not coming back. Finally the line on the other end went dead and I felt the first tear of the day fall from my cold eyes. I slowly lowered the phone from my ear. I sat there for a while, wondering if I would ever feel okay again.

The front door slowly opened and I looked up. My four best friend walked in, worry in their eyes.

"We thought we might find you here." Louis said, sadness in his voice.

They walked up the stairs and each took a seat on one of the stairs.

"We... we all miss her Liam." Niall whispered.

My eyes flickered up to him. "You have no idea." I whispered quietly.

"Your mum needs you to come home Liam. We all do." Harry said quietly.

"I can't. I need to be near the last things I have left of her." I mumbled.

The room was silent for a moment.

"Liam do you really think Beth would want you to be like this right now? Mourning over her, pushing everyone away?" Louis asked.

I glared at him, feeling the anger inside me rise. 

"You have no idea what she would have wanted! You have no fucking idea!" I yelled, getting up.

I walked back up the stairs swiftly and back into Beth's room. I slammed the door behind me and leaned back against the door. Slowly, I slid down until I was sitting on the floor. I had my knees pulled up to my chest and I let the tears fall. I could hear footsteps on the other side of the door.

"Liam you need to stop pushing us away. Whats going to happen to this band if you don't pick yourself up. We all miss Beth too, more than you can imagine but we aren't sitting around feeling sorry for ourselves. Beth wouldn't have wanted that." Louis said from the other side of the door.

I didn't respond. A few minutes later I stood up and opened the door. They were sitting against the wall talking quietly.

"Whats going to become of this band? Is that all that matters to you? Fame? Fortune? Well I would give it all away just for a moment to have here here with me. Just to see her smile, see her laugh. I would give everything I have just to have her. Now that I think about it, if I had never gone to the X Factor I might have been here when her mum died. When her father started abusing her. When everything in her life came crashing down and all she needed was someone who was there for her. I could have put a stop to this early. I could have taken her away before he got the chance to lay a finger on her. And she would be alive today." I choked out, tears falling from my dark eyes.

"Liam we both know thats not tr-"

"Yes it is! Its my fault she's dead! I didn't go look for her! I didn't do every single fucking thing in my power to get her back!" I yelled.

I pushed past all of them and ran outside. I ran into the forrest that surrounded her backyard and just ran. I needed to be away from everyone. I needed to get away. Finally I reached a lake with a small wooden dock. I slowly stumbled to the end of the dock and sat down, my feet hanging over the water. I looked up at the cloudy sky and wondered; was she watching over me now? I bit my lip and began to talk, hoping she would listen.

"I loved you then, I love you now and I will love you tomorrow and every day prior to that. Although you may not be here, you're still here in my heart." I whispered, looking up at the sky.

I felt a small drop of water fall onto my cheek and slowly, rain began to fill the atmosphere. 
 

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