Roses for Roselyn (Niall and Harry Fanfictions)

She was just an ordinary, grounded girl with a young, obsessive sister... little did she know that her sister's biggest idol was obsessing over her. Join Rosie and Rachel on their journey in love, friendship, obsession, fame and passion. What will happen? Who will happen? And most importantly, how will they cope with the disadvantages of 'the good life'?

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54. Listening

HARRY'S POV:

It was 4am and I still hadn’t slept a wink. I was sat at the kitchen table... just going through twitter, occasionally ruffling my hair and sighing at the tweets that I was forcing myself to read.

‘Harry Styles. More like Harry Where-Are-The-Death-Files? #HateForHarry’

At least that one almost rhymed, I tried to snicker and think lightly of it, but each one that I read caused a stab through the middle of my fast beating chest.

‘Who’s the one person we could all do without, in our lives? Yeah, that’s right, that god awful prick called Harry Styles. #HateForHarry’

‘Reasons to hate Harry- Number 21: He’s been with more women than you have in your full ancestry family tree. #HateForHarry’

‘How long can we keep this hashtag trending before he finalllyyyyy kills himself guys? #HateForHarry’

For each comment there were multiple replies, each sticking up for me, but I couldn’t concentrate on the positives as I scrolled down the page quickly, like a mad heroin addict who needed more and more.

“Harry?” Shit. I recognized the voice and slammed down the laptop lid before they could reach me. “Harry what are you doing up?” A pair of fake nails with black, glittered tips prised open the macbook air so that the tweets were completely visible to her and she looked at me worriedly out the corners of her eyes.

That was when I heard her breath in deeply. She brought both hands up to her mouth as she read through them slowly.

“Harry these are horrible.” Rachel managed to choke the words out and I smiled faintly.

“Just a perk of the job.”

“Hey.” Suddenly Rachel flung her arms around me; noticing the single tear that fell down my face. She pulled back, leaving her hands on my shoulders, so that she could survey my face.

I hid my cheeks in my palms so that I could swipe the tear away from my skin.

“Sorry. I don’t normally get like this.” I sniffed once, loudly, so that my voice wouldn’t end up sounding so pathetic. “Why are you down here anyway? I thought everyone went to bed.”

“Everyone did, but I’m just doing my job. Remember that favour I owed you?” I bowed my head, embarrassed at the state that I was in, but I wasn’t given much time before Rachel pulled my chin back up.

“Harry, you can’t listen to any of this. Why are you even looking at it?” She quickly scrolled down the page of tweets that I so regularly searched for when insomnia took over my brain. Each one labelled by the tweet #hateforharry.

I had no words. I simply shrugged and looked away from the laptop whilst Rachel sighed, disgusted at the tweets, and closed the page.

“You can’t do this to yourself. Look at you –it’s not healthy.”

“I know that...”

“Just... just don’t do it again. Promise me?”

“I promise.” I wasn’t sure how long it would be before curiosity killed the pact, but I would try to make it last as long as possible.

“Harry... are you okay? You’re normally so strong.” Rachel’s voice came out as a whisper.

She looked worried but my comforting words never came. Instead, my mouth replaced them with the true feelings that I felt. My voice cracked and I whimpered to the floor “No, not really.” Hunching my back over the table, I felt Rachel take my hand with one of her cool ones. She chewed on the nail that was on her other hand and stared into my eyes. I was only just starting to reveal my true colours to her, and yet it was all too much, too quickly. I needed to put myself on the defensive again.

“It must be hard for you.”

“It is. I wasn’t ready for it. At the time it was all exciting and new, I thought I was ready. But then after Xfactor, when all of the hate started happening, I didn’t know what to do. I felt like I had been chucked into the deep end before I knew how to swim. I was drowning.” I looked back up, expecting her to say something, but Rachel just sat there; gripping my hand tightly and allowing me to get it out of my system. “It’s overwhelming you know? I understand the tweets saying crazy things like ‘I love you’ and ‘Will you marry me?’ I get that because they’re fans and I’ve given them a reason to love me; by singing for them and opening up my whole life to them. But then there are the ones saying ‘Go and kill yourself’ and ‘Die you piece of shit’ and I don’t know how to feel. What have I done to make people feel like that? I’ve only ever been myself; does that mean that they hate me for being me? I always feel the need to justify myself and yet they can’t even give me a simple explanation for what I’ve done wrong. They give me nothing except despicable, painful comments. Rachel... it honestly breaks me down every time.”

“I understand what you’re saying. Do the boys know how you feel?”

“I think so. We can all get like this sometimes, you know, and we only have each other to pull ourselves back up.” She nodded caringly and I let out a deep breath. “Thanks Rachel.”

“For what?”

“Listening.”

“It’s my pleasure. How many girls get to comfort the famous and amazing Harry Styles?” Her eyes lit up as she laughed, and I understood that she was attempting to force a smile from my lips.

“Well most people don’t think that the famous Harry Styles would ever need comforting. And I can tell you that he doesn’t feel that amazing right now.”

She just smiled faintly and pulled me up by the hand that she was still gripping. “Well, maybe that has something to do with the lack of sleep that he’s getting.” I left the laptop where it was on the counter and turned the hallway lights off as we walked off and Rachel pulled me up the stairs.

“Which room are you in?”

“Umm... I don’t know... I didn’t really have a room last night.” Rachel smiled at me and didn’t think anything of it. It made me wonder whether she could remember me crawling into bed with her last night to stop the tears.

I was thinking about going into Liam or Zayn’s rooms when she spoke up. “Well there’s no point in you waking anyone else up. You might as well sleep in the Den bedroom with me?”

“Are you sure?” No, she didn’t remember. Either that or she wasn’t going to let me know that she did.

“Come on.” She let go of my hand but rubbed my shoulder as we made our way up the stairs.

When we got to the bedroom Rachel lay on the bed and I took my place next to her. We just chatted for a while about all the different countries me and the boys had visited whilst being a part of One Direction. Things were sounding more positive as I told her about all the different languages we had heard, and the foods we had tasted. Half an hour later, I found out that she really wanted to do a road trip of the States and visit some other places such as; Dubai, the Maldives (a collection of beautiful Indian Ocean islands), Argentina, Brazil, Australia especially and also some of the quieter islands of Greece.

“Maybe someday, you two girls could come travelling with us?”

“I think I’d like that.” She smiled at me and lay one hand on the pillow, that she had put down in the middle of the bed to separate us. I lay mine on top to tell her that I was grateful, and that was the last thing I remembered doing before I fell into a calm and relaxed sleep. Nothing bad lingered on my mind as I had gotten the opportunity to talk to Rachel, my truly amazing friend, and get it all off of my chest earlier. I slept for about four hours, until 10:00am, when the echoing comments of hate entered my mind just as they always did; waking me up so that there was nothing to do except run downstairs for a bowl of cereal and a polka dot mug of coffee whilst I waited for the rest of my friends to wake themselves up.

©nialls_tribute

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