Roses for Roselyn (Niall and Harry Fanfictions)

She was just an ordinary, grounded girl with a young, obsessive sister... little did she know that her sister's biggest idol was obsessing over her. Join Rosie and Rachel on their journey in love, friendship, obsession, fame and passion. What will happen? Who will happen? And most importantly, how will they cope with the disadvantages of 'the good life'?

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166. 'Every Smile...'

RACHEL'S POV:

Harry and I have arrived back at my house, so that I am able to spend time with Rosie whilst he is out doing things this evening. Once again he'll be going out with Kendall, although it is near the end of her dumb trip to London, and then the boys will be going to their Make A Wish charity event.

It's early into the afternoon and we are sitting around the table, skirting around the subject of his arranged date and talking about the charity event instead.

Harry's been picking at a whole bowl of grapes on the coffee table and i've just noticed that nearly all of them are gone.

"You don't want to spoil your appetite. For later." I say quietly, moving them further across the table with a mild smile. Harry leans forward and pulls them back, turning to me on the sofa.

"Trust me. I do."

"Don't be silly." I laugh. Saying things like that could get him into so much trouble with his management if they heard.

"I'm not being silly. Fine... It's not because of that, they're just good grapes!" He justifies himself unconvincingly.

"Yeah right..." he goes back to eating them and watching the news on the television, but i do feel a small sense of satisfaction. He's trying to spoil his appetite for a date with an incredibly pretty girl -to be honest, at this moment, I'm more flattered than I am jealous. "Are you excited about the charity event?"

He shrugs. "Yeah, I guess."

All those unwell and disabled children will be so happy to see him, why did he give such a negative response? "I guess?"

"It's just hard, seeing all those children in wheelchairs and with illnesses. It was the same when I went out to Africa." I place a hand on his forearm, seeing a different side of him. "It's just like, all the girls and people and children who come to our concerts and treat us like we're supernatural and special, and yet there isn't a thing we can do to help those people on the other side of the spectrum. We can't do anything more than smile and take pictures with them. That's all we can do."

"You can make them happy." I offer, raising one side of my mouth in a touched smile.

"It doesn't feel like enough. But that's why these events are so special. If this is the only thing we can do to help them I'd repeat it a thousand times... just to feel like I'm doing something worthwhile."

"You're sweet." I admire. "I bet that the only thing those little children need is a smile from you guys to make their days a tiny bit better. You can't change their world, right, but you can make it a little bit brighter for them?" I sit on my legs, squeezing his arm in my hand.

"I guess." He says, a wider smile appearing on his face, below his diverted eyes. Suddenly he turns to me. "I wish you could come with us. It'd be amazing. Just to walk freely down the carpet with you on my arm -showing off your pretty face. The children would love you and you'd know exactly what to say to people. It'd be great -just to see everyone admiring you and to show you off -my girl. I wish you could be there." He adds, nudging me with his shoulder and a dimpled smile.

I wish I could be too. For once I wish the cameras were turned in my direction. That the articles would feature me and my boyfriend, even if they are made up of lies; as Rosie complains about each and every one. I wouldn't hesitate about swapping positions with her in a split second. For a second i get whisked away in thought. It would be amazing. I can't deny that I'd love every second and it would be touching to see all of those beautiful, young, unfortunate faces... The corner of my mouth turns up at the idea, but then I fall back to reality. Of course not. It could never happen.

I really wish that Harry could take me out to get some food before the event, and that I could be the one walking the carpets on his elbow, and that's what makes me sad; instantly putting my defences up. I let go of Harry's arm and sit back, distancing myself and laughing.

"Oh no, not me. I'm just the faceless girlfriend. You wouldn't want me with you -I'm a nobody and no one would have anything to say to me anyway." I desperately try to convince myself of it; convincing myself that going to the event is definitely not what I want. 

"You definitely wouldn't want me with you -it'd be embarrassing." If I can't convince myself then at least I might be more successful at convincing Harry that it's not what he would want. "At least Kendall makes a pretty substitute." That's it. The final punch line that turns his smile upside down -furrowing his eyebrows- as if I had just kicked him in the stomach. I immediately regret it.

"Rae..." The nickname melts my heart.

"Okay, I'm sorry. Spur of the moment." I cross my heart. "I promise i didn't mean it." But I kind of wish I did; it would hurt less.

"It won't always be like this, you have to remember that." I bite my lip, unconvinced as he takes my hands and brushes a kiss on my cheek. "Don't be upset." He lets out an exasperated sigh. "You know I'd give anything to get out of this -to be freely in a relationship with you. And it's ridiculous that I'm being told what to do! In my own life! You know, I think I'd give anything to have my freedom with you. I'd give up everything I have -including my career."

"Don't say that." I snap as soon as he says it, reacting to his touch like his fingers are made up from curling irons.

"Why? It's the truth. You mean so much to me Rae."

"I'm not worth that much! Not at all Harry! You should never wish that."

"What are you on about?" He laughs lightly and dismissively. "You're worth all of it, you just don't see. Every second, every laugh," he brushes my cheek with the back of our hands, making me grin involuntarily. "Every smile..."

"You're a charmer." I whisper, diverting my eyes to his and tracing the lines on the palms of his hands.

"No," he corrects, the smile vanishing from his face to be replaced with a serious expression. "I'm deeply sorry. And I'm also going to make it up to you."

"You are?" I ask with interest and what I would say is moderate excitement, although Harry may beg to differ.

"Yes. But not now. You'll have to wait."

"You're always making me wait." I complain.

"Well, this time I'm sure it will be worth it."

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