What we had, whatever it was is now history, it's nothing, I don't care if we were best friends, that means nothing to me now..


11. Dead to me

The next morning i woke up on the floor in the bathroom, except i was clean and all the blood was gone. i looked up and the cabinet was closed and locked. i tried to stand up but the pain in my stomach was unbearable. i sat on top of the toilet and that's when i realized that i wasn't alone. Also asleep on the ground, was Miley. I didnt mind that she'd seen all of this. She knew that i used to cut, but she didnt know i still did, until now i guess. i held my stomach and tried to stand up. i walked over to the sink and stared at myself in the mirror. i look like shit. i walked into my room and threw on a jersey to hide my wrist and stomach. i walked downstairs to where my mum was making breakfast. "Hey mum" i said, trying to stifle the pain. "Morning Hun, i haven't seen you in a while." i smiled, i was never home. i was either at school or at Justin's. Shit School. "Hey mum" "Yes hun"? "I'm dropping out of college" My mum dropped the plate she was holding. "Hunny that's very funny, but no" i sighed, i was already very smart and i didnt see and reason in finishing school. i liked music, not singing but i enjoyed helping Miley with her music. My mum knew that and often took that thought into account when i told her what i wanted to be when i got older. "But mum, im too smart for school, there's really no point in me finishing up, i just want to pursue a music career" my mum stared at me for a moment, "That's true, but if you do, i still want you to study everything" "is that a yes" ? my mum nodded and i raced back upstairs, to find Miley sitting on my bed, dangling a key in her hand... "oh hello" i said, unsure if what to do next. She patted the spot next to her and i closed the door, locking it, and sat down beside her. "Tell me what happened that made you get this low" i sighed, i could tell Miley, but should i really tell her what happened ? "I had a fight with Justin" i sighed and so did she. she stayed quiet waiting for me to continue. "We hooked up, i may have kinda told Selena on accident and then Justin and i got into a huge argument, he called me a worthless bitch, a slut and a whore" it hurt so much, i couldnt stop the tears from falling. i cried into Miley's shoulder and she sung to me. "don't you ever say i just walked away i will always want you" My mind replayed last night, from when Justin spat Venom to when i ended up on the bathroom floor. I couldnt stand losing Justin, but after what he said to me last night, im going to find it hard to ever forgive him.. In fact i'll never forgive him.. What we had is now and forever history, i don't care if we were best friends for most of our lives, or if we told each other everything, i don't care if we were like brother and sister, brother and sister don't do the things we did last night.. Then and there i swore to Myself, Justin Drew Bieber is dead to me, no matter what..

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