Change My Mind

I don’t know if I’ll ever love someone as great as Harry so that’s why I never want to forget this feeling. That’s why I’m scared of moving on. I don’t want to forget what it feels like to be in love with Harry Styles, especially the feeling I got when Harry Styles used to love me back.


4. The Moon and The Eye

Lily’s POV


After we finished lunch, we got back into Ed’s car and drove to Buckingham Palace. Once we got there, I immediately turned into tourist mode. I had Ed take millions of pictures of me in front of the gate and in front of the statue.

“Okay, I think that’s enough pictures,” Ed said with a smile on his face as he passed me my phone back.

I laughed. “Fine.”

The stars were now out and the moon was bright as we headed back to Ed’s car.

“Let’s go home now?” Ed asked. “I have to go into the studio early tomorrow.

“No!” I exclaimed. “You promised me that we’d go on the London Eye.”

“We can go another night.”

“I want to go now. I was so excited to go.” I was now sounding like a whiny baby but I didn’t care. I really wanted to go on the London Eye.

“Sorry, Lil. I promise we’ll go another night.”

“How about you go home and I’ll go by myself?”

“Are you crazy? You can’t go alone.”

“Fine, Harry will go with me.”

Me and Ed turned our attention to a nervous looking Harry. He just stood there in silence, his eyes wide as he looked between us.

“I’m sure Harry has other plans,” Ed said.

Harry stuttered for a second as he looked at Ed.

Why was he being so weird?

“Harry, do you have other plans?” I asked. I looked at him with pleading eyes. I really wanted someone to go with me.

“Yes, he does,” Ed answered for him.

I narrowed my eyes at Ed. “I didn’t ask you, I asked Harry.”

We looked back at Harry and he seemed even more nervous.

“Well?” I asked.

“I…actually…don't have plans,” he said slowly, avoiding Ed’s gaze as he answered.

“Great!” I said, jumping on the spot a couple of times before I turned back to Ed. “So, me and Harry will go on the London Eye and you can go home and take your beauty sleep.”

Ed’s jaw tensed as he watched me walk over to Harry. He narrowed his eyes at Harry and I could see Harry still avoiding Ed’s gaze.

“Do you have a problem with Harry going with me?” I asked. Ed’s face softened after a second before he looked back at me.

He shook his head. “No, not at all.”

“Okay, then. We should go before it gets too late. I’ll see you back at your place.” I walked over to Ed and gave him a hug, which he returned after a few seconds.

I pulled away and saw that Ed was looking at Harry.

“Can I talk to Harry for a second?” he asked me.

My eyebrows scrunched in confusion but decided not to question him as I nodded and walked over to the bench away from the two boys. I sat down and watched them.

Harry’s POV

The second that Lily was out of earshot, Ed turned to me.

“I’m not going to forbid you from hanging out with her. Just remember what I said and what you promised. Okay?” He looked at me with such seriousness that I was starting to feel intimidated.

I just nodded and hummed in response.

He looked back at Lily, who was watching us with confusion in her eyes before he turned back to me.

“Take care of her, okay? Don’t let her out of your sight. Knowing her, she’ll get lost if you do,” Ed gave me a small smile and I gave him one in return.

“Of course. I won’t let anything happen to her.” I held out my hand and he took it before he pulled me in for a hug.

“Make sure you take her home yourself. I don’t trust her taking a taxi home alone.”

“Yeah. I’ll have someone come pick us up and we’ll drop her off at your place.”

Ed relaxed a bit before he gave me one last nod and said goodbye. He waved over his shoulder at Lily before he turned around and headed to his car.

I breathed a sigh of relief before I spun on my heels and headed towards Lily. She stood up as I walked towards her and gave me a small smile.

“I thought he’d never leave,” she laughed. “What were you guys talking about so seriously?”

I tensed at her question. “Oh, he just told me to make sure that nothing happens to you and that you make it home safely.”

She groaned. “He makes me sound like I’m a little kid.”

“Actually, I’d feel the same way if I were him. I wouldn’t want anything to happen to you.”

She shot her head up at me and she looked at me with a soft look. It seemed like hours passed by as we looked at each other before she finally looked away. It was dark out now but I thought I saw a hint of a blush appearing on her cheeks.

Maybe she’s just cold.

“So, how are we getting there?” she asked.

“Well, it’s not that far of a walk. Maybe 20, 25 minutes. It may seem like a long walk but it’s actually quite nice. We have to cross a bridge so you’ll be able to see all of the lights. It’s actually a beautiful walk.”

Her eyes brightened and she seemed to get more excited.

“That sounds nice,” she said. “Let’s go.”

She turned around and started walking and I couldn’t help the laugh that escaped my lips. She stopped walking and looked at me.

“What’s so funny?” she asked, slightly embarrassed.

I cleared my throat before pointing over my shoulder, in the opposite direction that she was heading.

“The London Eye is actually that way.”

She started blushing furiously as she hung her head down, hiding her face.

“Oh, sorry,” she mumbled as she headed towards me.

I just laughed as I turned around and we started walking side-by-side.

“Ed actually warned me not to let you out of my sight or you might get lost. Now I know why,” I chuckled.

She groaned and covered her face with her hands.

“How embarrassing!”

I laughed again and waited until she dropped her hands.

“It’s okay. I know you’re just excited to go.”

A smile appeared on her face, no ounce of embarrassment left.

“Yeah. I’ve wanted to go since I was a little girl. Last time I was here, I only saw it while I was in my parents car and we drove past it on our way to my aunt’s place.”

“Yeah, it’s great. I go on there every chance I get. You just see London in a whole new perspective. You never realize how big and beautiful it is, especially at night.”

I was lost in my thoughts and took me a while to realize that Lily didn’t say anything. I looked over at her and saw that she was smiling at me.

“Wow. I never thought I’d hear that coming from a guy’s mouth. That’s actually…cute.”

Now it was my turn to blush.

She didn’t technically say I was cute but it was close enough.

Oh god, I sound like a schoolgirl right now.

“You’ll just have to see for yourself,” I said, smiling back at her.

“I can’t wait.”

We continued to walk, as I told her about other places that she should see while she was here in London. Finally, we reached the bridge and she gasped.

“Wow, you’re right. It’s breathtaking.” She walked a bit faster until she stopped halfway across the bridge before facing out towards the water. Millions of lights lit the city and the water reflected it, the reflections dancing as the water rippled. But the most beautiful sight right now was the moon shining brightly in the sky. I could see Lily looking up at it was a smile on her face.

I slowly walked up to her and stood beside her before following her gaze and looked up at the moon.

“Have you read or seen the movie ‘Dear John’?” she asked suddenly.

“No, I haven’t. Why?”

“There’s a quote in the movie that I absolutely love. “No matter where it is in the sky…no matter where you are in the world…the moon is never bigger than your thumb. It's a full moon here tonight, which makes me think of you. Because, I know that no matter what I am doing or where I am, this moon will always be the same size as yours, half a world away.” I know it doesn’t seem relevant right now but it just amazes me that no matter where you are, you’re looking that the same moon as everyone else. You get to share this small moment with complete strangers but you’re all looking at the same beautiful sight. I’d like to think that the one that I’m going to spend the rest of my life with is staring up the moon with me at the same time.”

When she said those words, a shiver ran down my spine and I got a funny feeling in my stomach. I wanted to look at her but I couldn’t seem to pull my gaze away from the moon.

She had this great view of the world and of life and it was eye-opening. I loved how she made the smallest things seem like the most beautiful thing in the world. She just made looking at the moon seem like it would give faith to people that the love of your life is out there; they’re out there possibly looking at the same moon or the same star as you are and that eventually, you’ll find each other.

If you haven’t found them already.

“Let’s take a picture,” she said, snapping me out of my thoughts.

I turned to her and saw her taking out her phone before she turned her back to the moon and the water. I turned around and stood beside her. As she held out her phone to take the picture, she wrapped her free arm around me. I was hesitant at first but then I wrapped my arm around her and rested my hand above her waist.

I looked over at the phone, seeing me and her in front of the view of the lights and the water. But, the thing that brought everything together, the thing that would remind me of this night, was the moon shining brightly behind us.

I smiled as she took a couple of pictures before she made a funny face. I laughed before putting the funniest face I could pull before she snapped a couple more pictures. We both burst out laughing, our arms still around each other and I saw that she accidentally took pictures, catching this candid moment. She brought the phone up closer to her as I leaned in to look at the pictures with her. I smiled at the ones where we were smiling and then laughing along with her as she flipped to the ones of us making funny faces. But then we were silenced as the pictures of us laughing appeared on her screen. I got butterflies in my stomach as I looked at her laughing in the picture. She seemed happy. But then I looked over at my own face and saw how even more happy I looked. There was something about this picture that made me feel good inside. The fact that I was happy and the fact that she was laughing as she had her arm around me with mine around hers.

“I really like this one,” she said.

“Yeah, me, too. Do you mind sending those to me?”

“Of course. Did you want me to text it to you?”

“Yeah, that’d be great.”

So I gave her my number and she sent me all of the pictures we just took. I immediately saved them onto my phone before putting my phone away.

“Shall we head to the London Eye again?” I asked.

“Yeah, let’s go.”

We faced in the direction of our destination before we started walking again.

The walk remained silent for a while until a group of girls came out of nowhere and started surrounding me. I saw them shove Lily to the side, as they got closer to me.

“Harry, can I take a picture with you?”

“Harry, where are you headed? Can we go with you?”

“Harry, can I have your autograph?”

I looked over at Lily apologetically but she just mouthed ‘it’s okay’ and gave me a reassuring smile.

I signed as many autographs as I could before taking pictures with each and every one of them.

“Sorry, girls. I have to go. I’m with my friend right now and we really have to get somewhere. How about you write down your twitter names on a piece of paper and I’ll follow you later?”

They squealed in excitement before they frantically searched for a piece of paper. They all wrote down their twitter names and they handed it to me. I put it in my pocket and gave them a smile.

“Alright, I’ll keep these safe. But, if it’s okay with you, me and my friend have to leave now.”

They all nodded with big smiles on their faces, some of them with tears in their eyes before they walked away.

I looked over at Lily and saw her giving me a small smile. She walked over to me before we started walking again.

“Sorry about that.”

“No, don’t worry about it. I’d feel bad if I stopped you from doing that.”

“Okay. Hopefully, it doesn't happen for the rest of the night.”

She just nodded as we continued to walk.

A couple of minutes later, I heard someone whistle. I looked over at a couple of guys looking at Lily, making it obvious that they liked what they saw.

Lily seemed slightly frightened and, out of instinct, I grabbed her hand. She seemed shocked at first but then I felt her relax and squeeze my hand. I pulled her closer to me as we walked past the two boys, relief rushing through me as they lost interest.

I thought that Lily would pull her hand away now that we’ve walked past the two boys but she didn’t let go.

And I’m glad she didn’t.

I tried to hold back the smile that threatened to take over my face. Her hand in mine felt right. Her fingers were small but it fit in between mine perfectly.

All too soon, she let go as we finally arrived at the London Eye. She quickly walked to the ticket booth and waited in line. I reached her and stood beside her as we started getting closer to the front of the line.

Once the couple in front of us paid for their tickets and walked away, I saw Lily pulling out her wallet. I quickly walked in front of her and leaned over the counter.

“Two adults,” I said.

“Harry! I can pay for my ticket,” she said as she appeared behind me and attempted to push me to the side. I laughed at her attempt as I stayed put. The woman smiled knowingly at the two of us as she charged two adults tickets into the register.

“That’ll be £58.32."

I handed her my credit card.

“Harry!” She tried to grab the card out of my hands and I just laughed again.

“It’s okay, Lily.”

She gave up but crossed her arms over her chest.

The woman handed me the two tickets before I walked over to the side. Lily walked up to me and I handed her her ticket.

She took it but then she grabbed my hand and placed £30 in it. I quickly pulled my hand away before she could let go.

“Harry, take it, please.”

“Nope,” I said, popping the ‘p’ and grinning at her.

She groaned before she starting walking up to me. Not knowing what she was going to do, she held the bills in her hand and reached for my shirt pocket.

“Are you crazy?” I said while laughing. I took a step back, out of her reach.

“Harry, it’s a lot of money.”

“No, it’s not.”

She rolled her eyes. “Well, for you, it’s not but I feel bad.”

“Lily, don’t feel bad.”

“But I do.”

I sighed. “Okay, how about you pay for dinner afterwards?”

She raised an eyebrow at me. “Who said I wanted to go to dinner with you?”

My cheeks flushed as I looked down at the ground.

“Oh…well…I just thought…that…”

She started laughing. “I’m just kidding. Yeah, I guess that’ll be fine. Oh my gosh, you should have seen your face.”

A smile appeared on my face as she started walking away. I followed after her as we made our way to the long line of people waiting to get on one of the pods.

A couple of minutes later, it was finally our turn to get on the Ferris wheel. I held her hand to help her inside before stepping in after her. We walked over to one end of the pod and look outside. We were lucky that we had the pod to ourselves; usually there would be a few other people with us.

“Even down here, it’s beautiful,” she said.

“Yeah, it is.” I didn’t even realize that I was looking at her while I said this but she was oblivious to what just happened. I decided to turn my attention to the view around us.

Not a minute later, we started to move and a man’s voice surrounded the pod telling us that the ride was now starting and that it would last about 30 minutes.

As we got higher and higher, I could see Lily getting more and more excited.

“Wow,” she said breathlessly.

We were now near the top and she leaned closer to the glass window.

“Can you tell me about you mum, Harry?”

I was confused by her sudden, random question but then I decided to just answer her.

“She’s always been there for me and always goes out of her way to make me happy. I love her more than anything in the world and now I want to give back for everything she’s done for me. I want to take care of her now after she took care of me by herself for a long time when I was younger.”

“That’s great, Harry. That’s very admirable.” She was smiling at me before she turned away to look at the view again.

“Why are you asking?”

“Oh. I was just curious. I have this belief that you can learn a lot about a man’s character by how he treats his mother.”

I smiled at her words. “Yeah, so how’d I do?”

She rolled her eyes before looking at me with a grin on her face. “I’d say you passed the test.”

I chuckled.

“I’m just teasing. No but seriously, I think it’s quite sweet how much you love and care about your mum. I don’t see that in a lot of the guys I know.”

I nodded, wanting to ask her whether she learned the same thing with her ex-boyfriend but I decided against it, not wanting to ruin the night.

I felt like she wanted to ask about my dad but I guess she was wanting the same thing about not wanting to ruin this great night.

We spent the rest of the ride with me pointing at different things below and telling her about them. I showed her where I lived, pointing to a spot a bit of a distance from where we were.

As the other people started getting off, Lily turned to me.

“Thank you for coming with me,” she said with a smile. “I was worried that you were pressured into coming along with how much I wanted to go.”

“Of course not. I wanted to go with you.” I gave her a reassuring smile and she blushed as she looked away.

“I felt like I’ve had more fun with you than I have with Ed.”

We laughed together as we came to a stop at the bottom before the door opened and we stepped out.

“He’s a busy man,” I said as we starting walking towards the street.

“Yeah, I know. But hopefully, I get to spend more time with him. I missed him so much.”

“I understand. And yeah, he missed you, too. He talked about you a lot.”

“He did?” she asked, her face lighting up.

“Yeah, he’d talk about how great of a friend you were but most of the time, it was embarrassing things that you did.”

Her smile quickly disappeared before her eyes widened.

“I’m going to kill him!”

I laughed at how angry and cute she looked at the same time.

“I’d love to be there when you do,” I said, making her anger fade as it was replaced with laughter.

“He’ll probably kill you first for telling me,” she said.

“Ah, you’re right.”

We stopped as we reached the sidewalk and I pulled out my phone.

“I’ll call someone to pick us up and we’ll get you home.”

She started shaking her head. “I’ll just call a cab. You really don’t need to.”

“Ed’s rule number 2, don’t let you take a cab home, especially by yourself.” I chuckled.

“Of course he’d do that,” she said with a roll of her eyes.

I scanned through my contacts before finding the right one and calling them. I asked for a car to come pick us up at our location and I hung up before putting it back in my pocket.

“It’ll be here in 10 minutes.”

She just nodded. “Wait! How about dinner? I owe you for paying of the ticket.”

I smiled at her. “I’m actually still full from lunch and I was worried that you’d be tired. We can just have our dinner another night.”

She smiled back at me. “Okay, that’d be great. I actually am a bit tired. Thanks to you giving me a heart attack earlier.” She playfully nudged my arm as I laughed.

“Sorry about that.”

“It’s okay.”

So we waited for the car and 10 minutes later, a black SUV pulled over in front of us.

I opened the door for her and closed it once she got inside before hopping into the front seat. I gave the driver Ed’s address and he drove off. I glanced at the side mirror and saw Lily resting her head against the seat as she looked out the window.

I had such an amazing day today. I learned so much about her. Great things. It sucks that the day had to end but now I had another day to look forward to. Hopefully she still wants to hang out with me. I made the excuse of being too full to have dinner so that I’d get to spend another day with her. I was so glad that she agreed.

All too soon, we arrived at Ed’s flat. The driver stopped the car right in front of the entrance and I got out to open the door for Lily. She thanked the driver and I followed her inside.

She turned around once we got to the lobby.

“I think I’ll be okay from here,” she said.

My heart sunk a little because I wanted to walk her all the way to Ed’s door.

“I’ll see you soon, okay?” she said, making my heart flutter instead.

I smiled at her. “Of course. Just text me when you want to hang out. Or I’ll text you. Or…” I started to stutter as I realized I was rambling.

“We’ll talk tomorrow,” she said, giggling.

I took a deep breath before nodding. “Yeah. Okay. Good night, Lily.”

“Good night, Harry. Thank you again for today.”

“No, thank you. I had a lot of fun today.”

She just smiled at me before she finally did want I’ve wanted to do all night. She took a step forward to give me a hug. I instantly wrapped my arms around her, hugging her back. I took in her scent, wanting to remember it until I see her next. And all too soon, she pulled away.

“Good night again.”

“Good night, Lily.”

She gave me one last smile before she turned around and disappeared into the hallway that led to the elevators.

I turned around and headed out to the car. Once we started driving away, I pulled out my phone. I opened my messages and went to Lily’s name. My fingers hovered over the keyboard, not knowing what to say or even whether I should text her or not. I didn’t want to sound needy by texting her right after we said goodbye. I was about to turn off the phone when I got a text.

From Lily.

I know I said we’d talk tomorrow but I just wanted to say thank you again. I appreciate it. Have a safe drive home. Again, good night :)

A huge smile grew on my face as I read each word. I immediately sent a reply.

It was my pleasure. Good night, Lily. Sweet dreams x

I put my phone away, not wanting to get my hopes up that Lily would reply. We said our good nights and I was perfectly fine with that.

I didn’t realize I had a smile on my face the whole ride home and even when I walked into my house.

I spent the whole day with Lily.

I woke up and Lily was there.

I went around London and Lily was there.

I went on the London Eye and Lily was there.

And now, I was in bed going to sleep and in my thoughts, Lily was there.




Hope you like this part :) Things are about to get intense!

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