Change My Mind

I don’t know if I’ll ever love someone as great as Harry so that’s why I never want to forget this feeling. That’s why I’m scared of moving on. I don’t want to forget what it feels like to be in love with Harry Styles, especially the feeling I got when Harry Styles used to love me back.

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74. Sweater

Harry's POV

This is one of the things that I've fighting to have again. Lily in my arms as I watch her sleep. To top it all off, she's wearing my sweater. The same sweater that she wore the week that I spent with her while Ed was in LA. The same sweater she wore every night as I held her just like I am now. The same sweater she wore when I first confessed that I was in love with her.

I take the strand of hair that's fallen on her face and carefully brush it behind her ear. I continue to gently run my fingers through her hair and across her cheek, still in disbelief that I can touch her like this again.

I want to get as much as I can out of this. I'm leaving tomorrow and I have no idea when I'm going be able to do this again any time soon.

I know that both of us are scared about what's going to happen now but I also know that this time, we're going to do whatever it takes to make it work. We've gone through so much - too much - to let distance get in between us. I'm going to do whatever it takes to make this work. Just like I promised her, I'm never letting her go.

Even though I want to continue to watch her sleep, I want her to wake up now. I want to see her eyes and I want to see them looking back at me. So I lean over and place a soft kiss on her nose. I smile as she starts to stir in her sleep. When she opens one eye and sees me awake, she closes it again and snuggles into my chest.

I start to rub her back and lean my head back so I can see her again.

"Lily, wake up," I sing.

She quietly groans but doesn't move.

"Please...baby."

I smirk as I see her eyes shoot open but then she narrows them at me. Her cute, scrunchy angry face just makes the smirk on my face widen. I lean over to kiss her but she pulls back.

"Uh, morning breath," she says, covering her mouth.

I roll my eyes and lean forward again but of course, she pulls away right after.

"Lily, you do not have morning breath."

She takes her hand off of her mouth and smiles at me. "I was talking about you."

She squeals when I take my hands and tickle her. I roll us over so I'm on top of her and trap her arms against the bed.

"Excuse me, I do not have morning breath. When you were fast asleep and snoring, I went to go brush my teeth."

She gasps. "I do not snore." She tries to pull her hands out of my grip, most likely to smack me but I keep them pressed against the bed.

I chuckle. "I'm joking. But pretty please, can I have a good morning kiss?"

I pout and give her puppy dog eyes.

"I don't think you deserve one. You woke me up and then accused me of snoring. Not a good way to get a morning kiss from me."

"I'm sorry. I just wanted to wake you up cause I missed you."

She rolls her eyes with a smile and I see her cheeks redden. "Good save, Harry. But I actually really want to brush my teeth first."

I pout again. "But I'm so warm and comfy. I don't want you to move."

"If you let me brush my teeth, I'll let you kiss me for as long as you want."

I raise an eyebrow at her, waiting for her to say that she doesn't mean it. But she doesn't say anything. She just continues to look up at me, waiting for my answer.

I reluctantly roll off of her. "Fine. You better keep your end of the deal."

"I will, I will. Be patient, Styles."

I watch as she gets up out of bed and stretches. My sweater is big on her, reaching the middle of her thighs and completely covering her shorts. I can't help but stare at her legs as she walks over to the bathroom. She leaves it open as she washes her face, her sweater rising up when she leans over the sink. She catches me when she leans against the sink and turns to me when she brushes her teeth.

We have a staredown as she continues to brush her teeth, both of us making faces to make the other laugh. Toothpaste rolls down her chin when I succeed in making her giggle, causing her to lean over the sink and spit out the rest of the toothpaste.

She finishes a minute later and heads back towards me, jumping on the bed as I lift the thick blanket up and over the both of us. I pull it up right up to our necks and I engulf her in my arms. Warmth instantly washes over me as she snuggles right up against me, tangling her legs with mine.

"Now where's my morning ki--"

She shuts me up by placing her lips on mine and sliding her hand to the back of my neck. I don't waste a second before I respond and kiss her back. I glide my hand across her waist before I slowly trail it down to her bare legs. I wait for any sign that she want me to stop but she just presses herself closer to me. I take the back of her thigh and pull it towards me, letting it rest against my waist.

I know she said that I can kiss her for as long as I want but I know that she has her limits. I'll stop any time she wants me to. But she doesn't show any sign that she wants me to stop. If anything, she seems to be the one that deepens the kiss as she pulls on my neck to let me rest more of my body on her.

I continue to caress the skin of her legs and I gasp against her lips when I feel her hand glide up under my shirt.

Her warm hand slides across my abdomen before her fingertips trail to my back and presses against my skin. I pull her leg to wrap more around my waist and she bites my bottom lip and feel her press her fingertips harder against my back.

Both of us flinch when we hear a crash from somewhere in the flat.

"LOUIS! I told you!" we hear Eleanor shout from outside.

Lily laughs but I just continue to kiss her again.

"Hey, is that a long enough morning kiss?" she asks against my lips.

I lightly shake my head. "Mh-mh, a bit longer."

She takes both sides of my face in between her hands and gives me a lingering kiss before she pulls away. I rest my forehead against hers as both of us catch our breaths.

"Let's go see what Louis broke now," she says.

I lift my head up and look down at her. I tuck her hair behind her ear and give her one more kiss on her nose.

"Fine. But I would like to take you out today."

She reaches her hand up and brushes my hair away from my forehead.

"I would love that. And, um...I have a surprise for you later."

"A surprise? What is it?"

She raises her eyebrows at me and taps her finger on the tip of my nose. "It's called a surprise for a reason. You're just going to have to wait and see."

"Hm, well I definitely like what I'm seeing right now."

She hangs her arms around my neck and gives me her beautiful smile.

"You're sweet, Harry." She pulls me down and kisses me. "I love you."

I lock my gaze with hers, seeing the familiar look of love that I've been longing to see.

"I love you." I give her one last kiss before I push myself up and get out of bed. I stretch and watch as Lily slides out after me. She goes to her closet and takes out of pair of sweats and puts them on. I wish she wouldn't have to put on the sweats but with Louis and Eleanor here, I know she would feel uncomfortable.

She takes my hand and leads me out of her room and into the kitchen where Louis and Eleanor are. As soon as Eleanor turns around and sees our clasped hands, she screams.

Lily and I jump and so does Louis as he looks at his girlfriend like she's lost her mind. Eleanor walks up to us and squeals.

"I knew it! I knew it! I knew it! I freaking knew it! I-I'm so happy for you guys! Oh my gosh, I'm so happy you guys are back together!"

Lily takes a step back and leans into me. "Thank you, El. It seems like you're more excited than we are."

Eleanor rolls her eyes but her smile just widens. "You better tell me all about it later."

"I will. I promise. So what was that crash?" Lily ask. I sit down at the counter beside Louis as Lily goes and makes the two of us a cup of coffee.

Eleanor groans. "Louis thought it would be smart to use tongs to put the mugs on the top shelf instead of getting the stepladder. We have one less mug now."

Lily laughs and I see Louis shrugging and grinning at Eleanor.

"You had too many," Louis says. Everyone but Eleanor laughs.

Lily comes back with two cups of coffee in her hands and places them on the counter in front of me. She stands on the side of the counter but I pull to her me and let her sit on my lap. I glance over at Eleanor and see her smiling at us with bright eyes.

I just shake my head and take a sip of my coffee. Lily takes my free hand in hers and rests it on her lap. When Eleanor turns back around to continue making breakfast, I take that opportunity to kiss Lily's shoulder. She turns her head to look at me and a sweet smile spreads across her face.

I am so damn happy right now. I don't even care that I'm leaving tomorrow. I'm just focusing on right now being here with the girl of my dreams. I'm just happy that I'm here with her. She's mine again. I'm so damn lucky.

"I love you," I whisper.

Her smile widens and she leans in to place a kiss on my cheek.

"I love you, Harry."

I can never get tired of hearing that and I'm going to do whatever it takes to hear her say those words to me every single day from now on.

 

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