Change My Mind

I don’t know if I’ll ever love someone as great as Harry so that’s why I never want to forget this feeling. That’s why I’m scared of moving on. I don’t want to forget what it feels like to be in love with Harry Styles, especially the feeling I got when Harry Styles used to love me back.

328Likes
959Comments
1532966Views
AA

12. Step One

Lily’s POV

I went into my room while Ed got ready and took a shower before he has to leave for his meeting. I got my clothes ready to take a shower after Ed before I sat on my bed and pulled out my phone. I realized I got a text from Harry so I opened it up.

*Step one…I want you to sing and play the guitar by yourself first. I know it’s been a while since you last played so it’d be good if you warmed up before I get there :)*

Harry was right. It’s been a while since I last touched a guitar. The last time I played was before I had my finals for school. I guess it’s a good idea that I warm up before I play in front of him. Who knows how rusty I am now.

*Sounds good :) I’m just gonna take a shower and I’ll start right away. I’ll text you when you can head over*

I told Harry before that I would text him when Ed was gone so he could come over. It also worked out in our favour that Ed was going to a party tonight and that he would stay over at his friend’s tonight. He invited me but I’d rather spend the night with Harry.

Ed yelled from the hallway that he was done so I grabbed my clothes and headed to the bathroom. I quickly showered and blow-dried my hair before going back into my room to get ready. Ed left right before I finished and he told me to text him if I needed anything.

Typical Ed.

I almost smacked myself on the head as I realized that I forgot to ask him something. I ran after him before he left, just as he was walking out the door.

“Hey, Ed. Is it alright if I borrow one of your guitars? I was wanting to play a bit.”

Ed smiled at me. “Yeah, of course. Go ahead.”

“Thanks. See you later. Have fun tonight.” I smiled and waved at him before he walked away. I closed the door and headed to his room. I opened the door and walked in and headed towards the row of guitars that Ed had along one wall of his spacious room. I looked between the three acoustic guitars that he had before I decided to choose his Martin guitar. It was smaller than the others and would be perfect for me.

I grabbed it from the stand before carefully walking back to my room. I sat on my bed and put the guitar in my lap. I just glided my fingers along the neck of the guitar, familiarizing myself again with the feel of the strings underneath my fingertips. I strummed each string, making sure it was tuned. The sound of the strings resonating around the room instantly brought back memories of when I would play the guitar for hours until my fingers were sore. It reminded of how much I love music and how happy it made me. It reminded me of how I was able to escape from life and get lost in this world where I can make something great out of a simple guitar.

I started off with playing simple chords and simple strumming before I started getting into it and playing more complicated chords and patterns. And soon enough, I found myself singing along with no care in the world.

This is what I love to do. This is what I want to share with the world. This is what I want to do for the rest of my life. I was getting so lost in the sounds of the guitar that it took me a while to realize that someone was knocking on the door.

I placed the guitar on the bed before rushing to the front door. I opened it up and saw Harry looking worried before he looked up at me with a smile.

“For a second, I thought you weren’t here. I was calling you a few minutes ago,” he said. I let him in before I closed the door.

“Sorry. I was so into playing that I didn’t even hear my phone ring. I almost didn’t realize you knocking.” I chuckled lightly in embarrassment. Harry turned around to face me, a smile still present on his face.

“Don't worry about it. I understand.” He looked around the room before looking back at me. “So, you ready to start?”

I immediately tensed. This is what happens when I know that I have to sing and play in front of someone, even one person.

But this is Harry. He’s here to help me so I have to calm down a bit.

I managed a nod. “I’ll go grab the guitar.” I went into my room to get the guitar before nervously walking back to the living room to see Harry sitting on the couch.

I sat down beside him before holding out the guitar for him.

He looked at me with amusement. “What? I thought we were going to work on your stage fright.”

I laughed. “Nuh-uh. The deal was that I would sing and play after you do. That’s what we agreed on.”

He rolled his eyes with a smile before taking the guitar from me.

“Fine. But now you definitely have to sing and play for me.”

I gave him a nervous smile before he looked at the guitar. He strummed it a couple of times before he straightened up in his seat and took a deep breath.

He started playing the guitar and I was instantly engrossed in it.

Suddenly, he turned his head to look at me before he opened his mouth and the most beautiful sound came out.

 

“Baby, I, I wanna know

What you think when you're alone

Is it me?

Yeah

Are you thinking of me?

Yeah, oh.

 

We've been friends now for a while

Wanna know that when you smile

Is it me?

Yeah

Are you thinking of me?

Yeah

Oh, oh.

 

Girl, what would you do?

Would you wanna stay

If I were to say?

 

I wanna be last, yeah

Baby, let me be your

Let me be your last first kiss

I wanna be first, yeah

Wanna be the first to take it all the way like this

And if you

Only knew

I wanna be last, yeah

Baby, let me be your last

Your last first kiss.

 

Baby, tell me would it change?

I'm afraid you'll run away

If I tell you what I've wanted to tell you

Yeah.

 

Maybe I just gotta wait

Maybe this is a mistake

I'm a fool, yeah

Baby, I'm just a fool, yeah, oh, oh.

Girl, what would you do?

Would you wanna stay

If I were to say?

 

I wanna be last, yeah

Baby, let me be your

Let me be your last first kiss

I wanna be first, yeah

Wanna be the first to take it all the way like this

And if you

Only knew

I wanna be last, yeah

Baby, let me be your last

Your last first kiss, your last first kiss

Your last first kiss, your last first kiss.

 

Girl, what would you do?

Would you wanna stay

If I were to say?

 

Your last first kiss.

 

I wanna be last, yeah

Baby, let me be your

Let me be your last first kiss

I wanna be first, yeah

Wanna be the first to take it all the way like this

And if you

Only knew

I wanna be last, yeah

Baby, let me be your last

Your last first kiss

I wanna be last, yeah

Baby, let me be your last

Your last first kiss.

 

Oh, ohh

I wanna be last, yeah

Baby, let me be your last

Your last first kiss.”

 

He let the last chord ring out before silence filled the room. My eyes were locked on his, still lost after hearing his voice. I’ve heard him sing on the album but, hearing him in person, his voice is a million times better. That song was actually my favourite song from the album and after singing it to me now, it’s now my favourite song from all of their albums. The first word that he sung, I was gone. He had me and I never wanted the song to end.

But, sadly, it did.

I didn’t realize that I was still staring at him until I noticed him smirking at me. I shook my head and cleared my throat before looking back at him.

“Wow…that was great…you were great. I didn’t know you could sing that well.”

“Are you saying that you thought I was a bad singer before?” he grinned at me.

I shook my head feverishly, realizing how that sounded. “No, no. That’s not what I meant. I always thought you were a great singer but hearing you in person, it was amazing.”

He smiled before looking down, a hint of a blush present on his cheeks.

“Thanks,” he muttered.

“And that’s actually my favourite song on the album so extra points for that.”

He laughed as he looked back up at me and I joined him.

“Okay, your turn.” He held out the guitar for me and, once again, I felt nervous. I took the guitar from him and put it on my lap and took a shaky breath. I could see my hand slightly shaking as I gripped the neck of the guitar and I guess Harry did, too. He placed his hand on top of mine before I looked up at him.

“Don’t be nervous. Just started playing whenever you’re ready and you don’t have to sing right away. Just sing when and if you feel like it. I’m not going to pressure you or force you to sing. We’re going to take this one step at a time.” He gave me a comforting smile before I returned it with one of my own. I relaxed a bit at his words. I was worried that I would have to sing right off the bat so it was good to know that I only had to whenever I was ready.

I felt like I was ready but there’s only one way to find out.

I took a deep breath before looking down at the guitar. I decided to play one of my favourite songs to play. A song that I felt was relevant to myself right now. It’s a song by one of my favourite artists, Tori Kelly. And this song was one of my all-time favourite songs.

I started to play the guitar, starting off a bit shaky from nervousness but I just kept playing the opening bars over and over again until I started getting more into it. I started playing the entire song and by the end, I was lost in another world again. I forgot about my surroundings, I even forgot that Harry was sitting right in front of me. My fingers glided and strummed on their own as I felt myself getting lost in the sound.

I started the song over but this time, I started singing.

Harry’s POV

Lily started playing the guitar and I could tell that she was a bit nervous in the beginning but then she was starting to get the hang of it. I could see her getting absorbed in what she was doing as she continued to play this song that I’ve never heard before. She never stopped and I could see that she was getting more comfortable.

She was really good. Better than me. Her hands glided across the guitar effortlessly and gracefully as she strummed with her other hand. She was intensely focused on each chord, as she never took her eyes off of the guitar.

I realized that she started the song again but after a few bars, the most angelic voice I have ever heard resonated into my ears. My breath was taken away as I looked at her face and then down to her mouth as her lips moved to every word.

She was amazing.

No, she was perfect.

 

“I like being independent

Not so much of an investment

No one to tell me what to do

I like being by myself

Don’t gotta entertain anybody else

No one to answer to.

 

But sometimes, I just want somebody to hold

Someone to give me their jacket when it’s cold

Got that young love even when we’re old

Yeah sometimes, I want someone to grab my hand

Pick me up, pull me close, be my man

I will love you till the end.

 

So if you’re out there I swear to be good to you

But I’m done looking for my future someone

Cause when the time is right

You’ll be here, but for now

Dear no one, this is your love song.

 

I don’t really like big crowds

I tend to shut people out

I like my space, yeah

But I’d love to have a soul mate

God will give him to me someday

And I know it’ll be worth the wait.

 

So if you’re out there I swear to be good to you

But I’m done looking for my future someone

Cause when the time is right

You’ll be here, but for now

Dear no one, this is your love song.

 

But sometimes, I just want somebody to hold

Someone to give me their jacket when it’s cold

Got that young love even when we’re old

Yeah sometimes, I want someone to grab my hand

Pick me up, pull me close, be my man

I will love you till the end.

 

So if you’re out there I swear to be good to you

But I’m done looking for my future someone

Cause when the time is right

You’ll be here, but for now.

Dear no one, this is your love song.”

 

She finished the song and closed her eyes. Seconds passed by in silence as I waited for her. Slowly, she opened her eyes, her gaze slowly creeping up to meet mine.

She looked at me warily before I gave her a smile.

“Wow, Lily. You are incredible. You’re amazing.”

She blushed furiously with a small smile.

“Really?” she said.

“Yes, really. One of the best voices I’ve ever heard.”

Her smile grew and so did mine. She really was amazing. It’s a shame that she’s not able to share it with other people but that’s what I’m helping her with. Hopefully, she will.

I know she will. She has to.

“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” I asked.

“At first I thought I was going to die.” I laughed along with her. “But then I just came into this world where it was only me and the guitar. I didn’t notice anything around me. I completely forgot about everything except myself and the guitar.”

“That’s great. Now, you just need to do that when you play in front of other people. I know it’s hard but it gets easier as you get more experience and when you get more comfortable singing and playing in front of people.”

She just nodded as she listened.

“Every show that I do, I get nervous like you do. But then, I get on that stage, I see all of the fans. I see the other guys on that stage with me. And when I start singing, I realize that it’s what I love to do and that I want to share it with each and every fan. The nerves disappear and I just have fun with it. Like I said, it takes getting used to. I remember one of the first performances I had with the boys after the X-Factor, it was my solo, I was so incredibly nervous and I messed up so bad. I was scared to do performances from then on but I had the support of the other boys, from my friends and my family and I just kept working and working to get better and to get more comfortable and soon enough, I was able to get rids of my fears. I want that for you because I think that everyone should have the chance to hear you sing and play. You’re amazing. You have an amazing talent. And I can tell that you love doing it so I don’t want you to be scared of it.”

She just looked at me for a few seconds before she took a deep breath.

“Thank you, Harry. Not just for what you just said but for this whole thing. Believe me when I say that I have never sung in front of anyone other than Ed, not even my parents. Being able to sing in front of even just one person, in front of you, it feels amazing. I don’t know why, but I don’t think I would’ve been able to do that. So thank you. I know I still have a long way to go but I feel like I’ve taken a huge step. And thank you for sharing some of your words of wisdom, I really appreciate it.”

“It’s nothing. Really.” I smiled at her and she returned it with one of her own.

“I think that’s all I can handle for tonight,” she said as she placed the guitar on the other couch. I laughed before she sat back down beside me.

“I think so, too. You did great for the first day. I’m actually surprised.”

“What? You thought that I would run in my room and hide? Cause that’s what I thought I was going to do.” I laughed again but this time she joined me.

“Maybe,” I teased.

“Next time, I’ll be better, I promise.”

I smiled at her. “I know you will.”

She blushed as she leaned forward to grab the remote.

“Did you want to watch a movie?” she asked.

“Yeah, sure.” I leaned back against the couch and waited as Lily looked for a movie. After going through the guide, she flipped the channel to one that was playing “Meet the Parents”.

We watched the movie, adding comments and laughing throughout until the end. Lily turned off the TV as I looked at the time on my phone before facing her.

“I should go. I have work tomorrow.”

“Okay, sure.” We stood up and she led the way to the front door. Once we reached it, she turned around to face me.

“So, I’ll see you around?” she asked.

“Of course,” I said, smiling at her. “I have work the next couple of days but I’m sure I can find time to hang out.”

She nodded. “Okay. Just text me. Or I’ll text you. Or whatever.”

I laughed at her rambling, a blush of embarrassment appearing on her cheeks.

“I’ll text you,” I said.

She nodded again. “So, thank you again for today.”

“It’s my pleasure.”

“So…good night,” she said, just as she started leaning in for a hug. I immediately hugged her back.

“Good night, Lily. Sweet dreams.” We pulled away before she opened the door.

“Bye, Harry.”

“Good bye, Lily. See you soon,” I said before stepping out. She gave me a smile before I walked away, hearing the door close a second later.

Once again, I already felt anxious about the next time I’d be able to see her. I’m going to be busy this week with work so I might not be able to see her as much as I’d like but I'd make the time to see her occasionally.

When’s the next time I’ll see her? I have no idea.

But I’m already counting down the minutes.

 

***************************

 

Please like and comment :)

So what do you guys think? I really liked this chapter! I'm pretty sure all of you guys have heard of Last First Kiss :P but listen to Dear No One by Tori Kelly, I'm sure you'll like it.

Please like. I've updated a lot but I only gain like 1 or 2 likes each time :( that's all I ask from you guys, so please like! :) and comment :)

Love you guys. Thanks for reading.

Join MovellasFind out what all the buzz is about. Join now to start sharing your creativity and passion
Loading ...