Change My Mind

I don’t know if I’ll ever love someone as great as Harry so that’s why I never want to forget this feeling. That’s why I’m scared of moving on. I don’t want to forget what it feels like to be in love with Harry Styles, especially the feeling I got when Harry Styles used to love me back.


115. Angel

Please read A/N at the end of the chapter!


Lily's POV

As soon as I walk inside the dressing room, I'm bombarded with hugs from everyone. I greet the other boys, the band, Louise, Lux, Andy, Sophia and even Carla.


I look up and see Louis at the other side of the room, waving to me as he stands with El. I smile, walking up to them.

"Hey, Louis." I let go of Harry's hand before I wrap my arms around Louis in a hug. "How are you?"

"I'm good."

We pull away and I move to stand beside Harry again, crossing my arms as one of his hangs around my shoulders.

"Sorry I didn't say 'hi' last night. I--"

"No need to apologize. I understood." He wraps an arm around El, pulling her closer. "It was the same for me with this one here."

I smile at them, still finding myself in awe at how perfect they are together.

"Louis! You're next!"

I turn my head to see Louise just finishing with Niall's hair and observing from her side is Carla. She sees me looking at them and gives me a smile, one that I return.

"I'll be back," Louis says, giving El a quick kiss before he makes his way to Louise.

El sits down at one of the couches and I'm about to follow her but Harry tugs on my hand, pulling me back. I turn to him in confusion as he pulls me in and leans his face near my ear.

"How about our little plan?" he whispers, his arms snaking around my waist. Shivers run down my spine at his words and his voice and my breath catches in my throat.

"Harry, no. We can't," I whisper.

"Why not?" he groans.

I cross my arms and lean back to look up at him. "There's so much going on here right now. We'd definitely get caught."

"Oh, come on. We'll find something." He bites his lip and glances down at mine. "Lily, it's been five weeks. I don't think I can wait five more minutes."

I raise an eyebrow at him. "Well, you're going to have to because we are definitely not doing it right now."

He pouts. "Fine. But could you go wear a turtleneck sweater or something? You're teasing me with that top right now."

I glance down and see that my top is hanging a bit too low than it's supposed to. I quickly fix it, pulling up at the top to cover myself up more.

"There. Is that better?" I ask, looking back up at him.

He shakes his head. "Not at all. You still look sexy."

I smile at him and roll my eyes. "Well, then don't look at me."

"That's not possible. I'd still go crazy even if you were wearing a turtleneck."

I roll my eyes again and shove him. "You're being cheesy again."

"I know you secretly love it." His smile widens, as does mine.

"Hm, you'll never know."

I lean up to kiss him but someone shouts from beside us. Before I have time to see what it is, Harry and I are attacked with silly string. Instead of being protected by Harry like I thought he would, he grabs my arms and pushes me in front of him, using me as a shield.

I scream as I'm still being covered with the silly string, putting my hands up in front of my face. However, it does nothing to stop it since it's coming from all directions.

"Stop!" I shout.

All I can hear is people laughing and it only takes a laugh from a certain someone to know who they all are.

"Ashton! If you don't stop right now, I will kick you!"

"Can you even reach me from down there, shorty?"

I hear everyone, including Harry behind me laughing. I try to wriggle out of his hold but he keeps me in front of him.

"Harry! Let me go!"

I quickly shut my mouth when a bit of silly string goes into my mouth. I splutter it out and try even harder to get out.

Fortunately, the silly string finally stops but I know that the reason is because they've run out. As everyone continues to laugh at me, I pull everything off of my face and glare at the four boys in front of me holding two cans of silly string each in their hands.

I look down and see my entire upper body covered and I would bet all my money that my hair is completely covered, too.

To make this entire experience worse, I look over and see Louis pointing his phone at me, struggling to hold back his laughter.

"You guys are so mean."

I walk over to the free mirror and start cleaning myself up.

"Oh, come on," Calum says. "You two were about to suck faces. We were just trying to save everyone from seeing that."

I blush slightly as I pull silly string from my hair. I remain silent but then I glance at Harry in the reflection.

"And you. Thanks for helping."

"Any time." He winks at me before we walks up and helps me clean the rest of the silly string from my hair. I turn around when he pulls the last of it off of me and he leans down and places a quick kiss on my lips. "Did you want me to go beat them up?"

I let out a light laugh, unable to hold back my smile anymore. Harry and I both know that I wasn't actually mad. I think I was more frustrated trying to get it all off.

"It's alright. I can do it myself."

This time, Harry laughs as he tucks my hair behind my ear. I cross my arms and he wraps his around my shoulders. "I know you can take them. All four of them."

I nod. "Hell yeah, I can." I see some silly string in his hair and I carefully pick it out. "Your hair is so long now."

"Do you like it?" I catch a hint of wariness in his tone and I smile at the thought of him worried about whether I like it.

"Of course I like it. It looks incredibly sexy on you."

His cheeks turn pink and he bites his lip. I love making him blush. He's usually the one doing that to me so it's nice to have the upper hand once in a while.

"There's a lot more to grab onto when we' know..." I whisper. I demonstrate by lightly tugging on his hair.

His brows rise in surprise and I just continue to smirk up at him.

A low groan rumbles deep in his throat as his eyes dart to my lips. "Alright, well then I'm definitely gonna grow it even longer."

I giggle as I wrap my arms around his neck, leaning up on my tiptoes. "And you'd still look sexy as hell."

He hums and leans closer to me. "Nothing compared to you, baby."

He places his lips on mine and I smile against the kiss.

"EW! Gross!"

Multiple voices groan overdramatically and I roll my eyes as I pull away and look over at Ashton and the others. I just lean my head against Harry's chest as he decides to give them the finger.

Just as Ashton decides to start throwing M&M's at Harry, my phone rings. Harry keeps his one arm around me as he uses his other one to catch the candy and throw them back at Ashton. I take out my phone and answer it, seeing that it's Marcus.

"Hey, Marcus."

As soon as I say his name, Harry snaps his head down to look at me with a furrow in his eyebrows. He just watches me, not even caring about Ashton who's still throwing the candy at him. I playfully glare back at him but I decide to leave a quick kiss on his lips. It seemed to work because his face softens slightly. However, he still continues to look down at me.

"Hey, Lily, we're all here. We're having a bit of trouble with security so could you come meet us here?"

Harry had told me that he had informed security that my friends were invited backstage but I guess they're just doing their jobs and being careful.

"Yeah, sure, I'll head there now."

"Okay, see you."

I hang up and put my phone away before I look back up at Harry.

"They're having a bit of trouble with security. I'm gonna go get them."

I can see him visibly relax and I know that he must've been curious as to why I told Marcus that I would go see him.

He nods. "Did you want me to go with you?"

"Harry, you're next!" Louise says.

Harry sighs. "I guess not."

"I'll go with her."

Harry and I turn to see Louis standing beside us.

"You don't have to. I'll be fine." I felt bad that I have to take some of their time to get my friends. They're about to go on stage. I'm sure he'd rather relax.

"It's alright. I just want to make sure your friends get here without any more trouble."

I smile at him before I look back at Harry.

"Do you mind?" he asks Louis. "She might get lost."

I roll my eyes and smack his chest. Harry and Louis laugh at my expense as I pull away from Harry.

I'm about to reply to his comment but Louis walks up to me and shoves me.

"Let's go," he says, still laughing.

Knowing that it'd be pointless to argue with him, I take a step towards Harry and give him a kiss.

"I'll see you in a bit," I say.

"See you."

Harry makes his way to Louise and I walk up to Louis before we head out of the dressing room. One of the bodyguards walks in front of us after Louis explains to him what happened and together, we walk along the hallway.

"So, how are you and Harry doing?"

I look over at Louis with puzzlement. I know he's just being curious but his question caught me off guard.

"We're good. We've never been better. I mean, those five weeks without seeing him was torture but he made sure to make me feel the same amount of love I felt before he left. He's...amazing."

I find myself smiling as I reminisce about how perfect everything has been lately. It's not until I feel Louis elbow me that I snap back to reality.

"You two really are perfect for each other. He's mad in love with you. I swear, there were a couple of times that I wanted to rip my ears off."

I playfully glare at him and shove him with my shoulder.

"I'm just kidding," he laughs. "But really, I've never seen him like this. I'm happy for him. There's nothing better than seeing one of my best mates insanely happy. You wanna know what he said to me one time?"

My heart leaps in my chest and all I can do is nod.

"He told me that, every day, he wakes up thinking that it's all a dream but then he'll look at a picture of you or look at your bracelet that you gave him that he never takes off or anything that reminds him of you and he'll remember it's all real. And every time he's waiting for you to finish school, he gets so anxious. It's actually quite hilarious but as soon as he hears your voice, he gets so happy. If you could only see his face whenever he talks to you..." He trails off, shaking his head.

Hearing Louis talking about Harry like this was not what I was expecting our topic of conversation was going to be but honestly, it's one of the best things I've ever heard.

"And the most surprising thing he told me..."

I glance over at Louis again, waiting patiently for him to continue.

"He said that he doesn't know what he did to deserve an angel like you."

And just like that, my heart bursts in my chest. I can't hold back the smile spreading across my face or the blush rushing across my cheeks. Harry's never said anything like that about me. Even though Harry has said more than enough sweet and romantic things to me, this is definitely surprising.

"Really?" I ask timidly.

Louis looks over at me, giving me a warm smile.

"Yes, really. In those five weeks, there was not one day where you couldn't see that he is completely, head-over-heels, madly and sometimes annoyingly in love with you."

I laugh softly at his words even though my eyes are lightly tearing up. Louis seems to realize as he puts his arm around my shoulders.

"I know this may scare you a bit but I personally think that you two are 'it'. I know you two see that in yourselves already but I just wanted to let you know that everyone else can see it. I can see you two settling down and growing old together. Honestly, I think that you two are going to get married before any of us will."

I laugh along with Louis. Of course it freaks me out a little that someone else is talking about Harry and I getting married and growing old together. I know I've thought of it myself but knowing that other people see it, it's both scary but exhilarating.

"Why are you telling me this?" I ask quietly. Ever since he first asked me about me and Harry, I was curious as to why.

He shrugs. "I don't know. I mean, there were a couple of times where I witnessed Harry get a little shaken up, thinking that after all that time apart from you, you're not going to want that kind of relationship anymore. I guess I just wanted to tell you all of this in case you felt that way, too. You should know that Harry isn't going anywhere, not if his life depended on it. His whole world revolves around you. Every city that we went to, he'll be like 'oh, Lily would love it here' or 'I wish Lily were here'. When we'd go shopping, he point out every single thing and ask 'will Lily like this? Should I get this for Lily?'. I know you two went through a lot to get to where you are now so I'd hate to see you two lose that, no matter what happens."

Even though the part about Harry thinking that I wouldn't want to be with him anymore bothered me a bit, after I reassured him numerous times that no matter how much time we spend apart, I will never leave him because of it. However, everything else that Louis told me, it just solidified everything I was hoping for for Harry and I.

"Don't worry, Louis. I'm not going anywhere, either. I love him. So much that it scares the hell out of me sometimes. He's wonderful. He makes me so happy. I know I'll never find anything as close to what we have with anyone else."

Louis smiles down at me. "Good. I'll be waiting for the wedding invitation."

I laugh and smack his stomach. "Oh, shush. Does Harry even know that you're telling me all of this? Am I even able to bring it up to him?"

He shrugs. "He never told me I couldn't. Can't blame me if he gets mad."

I laugh again. Of course I want to bring it up to him. I know it'll catch him off guard so it'll be nice to have him all flustered and nervous. It's a rare experience for me so I know I'll definitely be talking to him about all of this.

"I'm sure he won't mind," I say.

"Yeah, I mean, you're going to have his whole house to yourselves tonight so I'm sure you'll find a way to calm him down if he gets mad at me."

He smirks and gives me a wink and I blush furiously as I understand what he means.

"Shut up," I mumble.

"I mean, unless you two are tired from last night after having the whole flat to yourselves."

I glare at him and smack his stomach. "Shut it. We didn' that last night. We literally went to sleep as soon as we got there."

"Okay, yeah, and I'm David Beckham," he says sarcastically.

"I'm serious!"

"You two didn't see each other for five weeks. I wouldn't be surprised if you two couldn't even wait and did it in the elevator."

"Louis!" By now, my cheeks are hot and I'm constantly glancing around me, seeing if anyone heard.

"I mean, you two couldn't even go one day without having sex when you were together. That's why Eleanor suggested we let you two have the flat for yourselves. We definitely wouldn't have been able to sleep through that."

I groan, not even bothering to convince him anymore.

"You really are freakishly similar to El."

I remember El teasing me about having sex with Harry three times a day. Those two really are like two peas in a pod.



Anyways, please vote and comment. I've chosen someone for the Liam solo DM already but don't worry, I just got even more of them so I'll be giving them out to you guys.

I won't be saying which chapters I'll be choosing the winners from because I don't want you guys to comment only because you want the Liam DM. So just comment and you never know, I may just choose you.

I'll be doing different contests every now and then for the DMs so keep an eye out.

AND OMG ARE YOU GUYS READY FOR THE DMD MUSIC VIDEO??? THE PICTURES THAT WERE LEAKED WERE AMAZING! I CAN'T WAIT FOR IT. I think they're just gonna show a teaser/short clip tomorrow but you never know. If it does get released, let's try to beat the VEVO record and make our boys proud.

Also! I decided to make an iMessage to message you guys. I'm not going to post it on here but if you guys want to talk, you can DM me on here or message me on kik for my email address :)

Thanks for reading! Love you guys <3

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