Living A Life Without You

Today I sit at the table and write to you again, I know you are no longer with me, you moved on. You will probably never read this letter and it will end up in the trash but I’ll still write, I may sound over protective or like I want you back. I really do, but how can you get someone back after what I did? I am writing this letter to you to say sorry, it’s all my fault. I should have been with you, not with him. Over the other side of the world, I told you I was sick but in reality I just needed to be with him for another day before seeing you. Yes, I was visiting my brother’s grave. But Now I’m visiting yours.

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3. Speaking of The Dead

Ava’s POV-
I walk through the front door of our huge house, I never moved from our house. I still live in the house that holds so many memories of you, of us and of the kids. I can’t bear to leave it, it’s the only thing I have to connect me to you. I don’t think I will ever move on, it’s too hard. Your smell has almost disappeared from the house, maybe it has but I’m imagining it, just like I imagine you walking through the front door every day. Somehow I believe you are still alive, but you aren’t, are you? Niall watched you die. He touched your cold, dead body. He tried to save you, he tried so hard only to not be able to. You were too far beyond saving, but he believed that it was his fault, that he was the one to blame, but it wasn’t. He couldn’t save you and he couldn’t find April or Tom. He never found their bodies, they never found their bodies. You were driving and it all happened, he was there and somehow I was there. It’s probably my imagination running wild, I imagine how you died, how they died. How I died inside, that day will haunt me until the day I die.

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