Left Alone

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25. Home

Mom followed me with her eyes when I came into the kitchen. She saw a change in me, but couldn't put her finger on what. I tried to be natural, but all the sounds around me influenced me. She put on the coffee and it cut into my ears. Still, she saw only a small part of my reaction.
"Are you pregnant?" she got out, and immediately I puffed out. She didn't know I was a vampire, and she chose something more natural.
"I don't know!" I lied and smiled at her. "Who knows?"
Mom laughed and immediately stopped to look at me strangely. Instead, she sat down and started talking about earthly things. I heard a neighbour yelling at his wife, I heard a girl three houses away crying and I heard a rat going into a building. There was so much noise and I realized why Niall wanted to live in the countryside, far away from everyone else.


Actually, I was going crazy. Any sound that appeared, all voices and all movements. It did so that I always felt my tense and I was losing my mind.


"Nelly you need to relax!" Niall said one evening. I cried and just felt hopelessness. Not even in the castle, it was quiet. I heard Louis and Harry. Zayn had come back and he just sounded more. Niall looked at me that I was suffering and he sat quietly next to me.
"Shall we go back to Italy?"
I wiped away the tears
"Does it help?"
Niall nodded direct and stroked my hair.
"Yes, it's quiet there and you don't hear more than you can cope with!"
I nodded to the end.
"Yes, we are leaving Ireland!"


Mum cried when she heard that I was moving even further away. We blamed that Nialls grandmother was dying and we had to be present her last time. Mom believed in us and she hugged me tightly.
"Promise to come back home!"
I said neither yes or no! Instead, I swallowed and hugged her back.
"I'll call you!"
She released me and nodded. I saw her wipe away tears, and then she tried to pull her self together.
"You've grown up so fast and I miss my little Nelly!"
I smiled weakly at her.
"I'm your little Nelly, but in a different way!"


I cried all the way to the airport. I sat down on the plane and tried to turn back all my senses. Yet I heard the slightest movement the planet did and my head ached. I couldn't even relax and gather myself together.


I felt disgust when we got back to the castle. It just brought memories of my grandmother, but at the same time it became my salvation. I managed to control the few sounds that showed up and I gathered myself into one piece. 


"Nelly!" Niall whispered to me one night. We sat and read a book in the library and we sat near each other "Have you thought about children?"
I was startled, and met his gaze.
"You mean get pregnant?"
Niall nodded and smiled weakly.
"I've begun to wonder if we shouldn't raise a child?"
I swallowed
"But I can barely take care of myself?"
He just smiled and ran his hand through my hair.
"One day you will be a mother and I'm thinking about what wonderful to take care of a child?"
I sighed and made ​​no reply. I hadn't had a single thought about being a mother yet.
"A love child?" continued with Niall and I saw how he was praying. I sighed and shook the head.
"I can't right now and we have the eternity for ourselves!"

Niall sighed and looked down at the book again.
"I would like to be a father, and we are ready!"
I looked straight at him and looked at his profile. Okay that Niall had waited long enough, but I was just a newborn vampire. I wanted to get to know my new senses before I got a child. Also, I wondered how a vampire got pregnant? Imagine if I killed the baby?
"How do you become pregnant as a vampire?" I asked why and Niall laughed lightly at my question.
"Frankly, in the same way like an ordinary person. Difference is that we have to make it on the right day of the month. You must be ready in the whole body!"

"So we have only one day for ourselves per month?"
He nodded and smiled. I sighed and shook the head
"Not right now, I will not think of that idea yet?"
Niall was disappointed, but at the same time, I felt reluctant to have a child right now. We had lots of years in front to come and why now?


In the end, it went always as he wanted, or maybe not? I chose to say yes to his question and he became a new man. He contacted a doctor and lied that we had difficulty having children. That we had to keep an eye on exactly the right day. Niall took  home a lot of things that we could use and it took a while before we learned how to do.


I took out the temperature from my mouth and Niall took the stick that I had wet.
I looked at it and laughed
"Right!" I then looked at him. "And what does the stick telling us?"
He was overjoyed


We tore off our clothes and threw ourselves in bed. I knew immediately that he was horny and his whole body was screaming for me. We kissed each other passionately and I felt he took over my body in his power. When he penetrated, it was like coming home and our bodies became one big lump. He was moving fast as ever and he made me crazy. I spun around and ended up on top of Niall. I rode him like he just loved it and I felt how he filled me right up. I looked at him that he loved it and he was making me feel so close to him and our lips were like a single lip. I kissed him, I let our tongues meet each other and he played with my skin.
"Faster!" Niall mumbled and immediately I smiled at him. He took his hands around my waist and brought me up and down firmly. Niall closed his eyes and I saw that I got him to reach farther to before.

"Faster?" I asked, and he smiled and nodded directly
"Yes Kath! Faster!"
I stayed up.


Had he said my grandma's name?


Niall panted and looked at me in surprise.
"What happened?"
I swallowed and rolled off him
"You said Kath?"
Niall shook directly on the head.
"Come on baby!" He took his hands around me and tried to get me to return to his body. I shook directly on my head and looked at him coldly.
"YOU said Kath!"


Niall eventually landed and just stared at me. I sat up in bed and felt the emptiness returned.
"I'm not Grandma!" I whispered. "I'm not Kath!"
He swallowed.
"Are you sure I said that name?"
I nodded and felt the tears coming.
"Is she on your mind?"
Niall shook directly on the head, but I saw that he was lying. His eyes said something else and I saw the pain in him. I just stared at him, then I stood up and left the bed.
"But Nelly!" Niall exclaimed, reaching for me. "Maybe I happened to say her name, but you know...!"
I turned around to him and looked at him coldly.
"You said Kath and I see at you that you're lying!"

I put on my clothes and left the bedroom. I felt the tears poured out and I was afraid of what was true. I had heard how he specifically screamed her name and he said it in such a way that it wasn't a coincidence.


"Come on, Nelly!" I heard Niall shout after me, but I didn't go back to him. I ran down the stairs and out of the castle. I ran so far that I almost got lost. Were grandma left in his head? Why had he said her name?


I cried so that I eventually didn't see where I was. All the emotions came up and I realized that Niall hadn't come over grandma. He still had feelings for her, but he was too afraid to admit it to me.
"Damn!" I shouted out straight. "I hate you grandma!"
I sat down and couldn't bother me where I sat. I felt my whole body shook and my thoughts spun around. Could it really be so that he loved her still, but saw a bit grandma in me?

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