Just another fan (TH)

Just Another Fan is just another Tokio Hotel fanfic :D


4. You're not the only one who lost someone

I opened my eyes and looked at the clock on my wall. 6:15 am. I had hardly slept all night, because I was so exited. It was the day of my first audition on Deutschland Sucht Den Superstar. All I wanted was a recall note. My dad always said "focus at one thing at a time", and that was what I was planning to do.
I went up and began to get ready. I hadn't been wearing much makeup lately, but I still had all my old makeup, so I decided to go all in with the makeup. Or not all in, but I would wear as much as I did 2 years ago. I used to watch tons of 
video tutorials on how to do makeup, so I was actually quite good at it. As I did my makeup I practiced both Don't Jump and Zoom Into Me once again.
When I was done I went in to my sisters room to wake her, but she was already up. And she was ready to drive to Berlin so I could enter DSDS. I was so happy she went. I wouldn't be able to do it without her.

I went to my mom's room to see if she was up.
"Where are you going Annabelle", she asked. I had told her like a billion times, so this really pissed me off.
"As I've told you before I'm going to enter DSDS as dad wanted me to", I answer and begin to walk away.
"How are you planning to get there", she asked.
"Well I was going to take the train with Lily, unless you want to drive us", I answered as I walked back into her room.
"Sorry I can't go, not today", she said and laid down in bed again. I couldn't believe her. She wasn't doing a thing all day long, and she couldn't even come to see if I got through or at least to be outside with Lily.
"Then when do you have time to be there for us? You're always so damn busy, but you know what mom? One day I won't be here to take care of you. As soon as I'm turning 18 I'm gonna move far away, and I'll take Lily with me. You're not the only one who lost someone, you know that? He was our dad. Lily lost her dad in an age of 7. And you're not there for here at all. You can't even get your ass off the chair to go to work for a couple of hours so you could make some money, so I wouldn't have to spend all my time at a shitty job. You're supposed to be the strong one, not me", I said and walked away. I had never told her how I felt before, but it felt really good to finally tell her. 

Lily and I sat in the train to Berlin in silence. I figured she had heard what I told my mom.
"Anna maybe you were a bit too hard on mom? She lost someone too, dad was her husband after all", Lily almost whispered.
"Well I know that, and it's okay that she's sad, but she's still a mother, and she has to take care of her children. Or just take care of you. Im the grown up in our family, and I'm just a teenager", I said. 

When we finally arrived to the place where DSDS was this year I became very nervous. Lily took my hand and told me to calm down.
"You're a great singer, so I can't see how this can go wrong", she smiled.

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