Just another fan (TH)

Just Another Fan is just another Tokio Hotel fanfic :D

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18. Terrible day

When I got home I threw my bag inside the door, and then I took my phone and called Lily.
"Hi Anna. I'm so glad to hear from you. How did it go? When are you going to find out if you're through or not", Lily asked. She sounded very happy.
"Hi Lily I've missed you so much, like you have no idea. It wen't okay. The first song in groups went great for me, but not for the others in my group, so they kinda hate me. But I'm gonna find out tomorrow. How's your foster family? You sound really happy", I said. I was happy she was happy, but it was kinda painful to know that I wasn't the one making her happy.
"It's great, I absolutely love it here. I have a step mom, a step dad, a step sister and even a step dog", she said and laughed.
"You've got a step sister? How is she", I asked. It was really hard for me not to let her hear my pain. I felt like she had replaced me. Like she got another sister who was way better than me, so why would she ever want to talk to me again? She was all I got, but she had so much. 
"Don't worry Anna. I can still talk to you, even though I have a step sister. But she's really nice actually. I like her a lot. You should come visit us some day", Lily said. I could hear that she was smiling, even though I couldn't see it.
"Lily can I talk to your step mom", I asked. I kinda needed her permission before I just showed up.
"Sure, I'll go get her now", she laughed, and then she walked to get her. 
"She's here, bye Anna", Lily said.
"Bye Lily, I can't wait to see you", I smiled.

"Hello Anna, this is mrs, Achen", she said. She did not sound happy.
"Hello mrs. Achen, I just wanted to talk to you, so we could find a day where I could come visit, or take Lily to the park or something", I said, and I did everything to sound as happy as I could. 
I could hear mrs. Achen walk quick and loud, and I heard a door slam behind her. This wasn't a good sign.
"Anna now you listen really close, because I'm only gonna say this once. If you ever contact Lily again I swear to God I'm gonna kill you. You've destroyed her life completely, and yet she still looks up to you. If you, and your ugly face, ever come her, I will make your life a living hell", she yelled and hung up.
I couldn't believe this. How could she say I destroyed her life? I was the one holding it together. Or was I? Maybe she was right. Maybe I ruined everything for her. Maybe it was my fault she cried. Maybe I was the one who let her down, not mom. And now mrs. Achen wouldn't even let me talk to her. My last words to Lily was "I can't wait to see you", and now I couldn't even see her again. I felt dizzy again, so I took a few deep breaths, and then I went to the hospital to talk to mom.

I went to the hospital, and it was filled with people. I went to ask a nurse if I could talk to my mom.
"I'm sorry to tell you this", the nurse said. "Your mom killed herself this morning".
I couldn't take this. I collapsed and began to cry again. I didn't even care if people was looking at me. My mom had killed herself. Wasn't the point of sending her to a hospital to make sure someone was watching her all the time, so stuff like this wouldn't happen. Last time I talked to mom we were fighting. She properly didn't even knew I loved her. Maybe this was my fault to. Of course it was. I kept telling her to act differently, and I was so mean to her all the time. I could not bear this anymore. Lily was safe though. That helped me. But I might never see her again. 

This day could not be any worse.

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