Save You.

What I would do to save you.


4. chapter 2. Despair.

"People who die by suicide don't want to end their lives, they want to end their pain."






Chapter 2.



He always had a smile on his lip's, always helped other's who were in the need. I don't understand why he would do this to me, to all of us. How would the press take it? The fan's?


All I understand right now is that he is gone now, And I can't do anything about it. 


" Sam? Love, are you decent?" Anne's soft voice came from the door. Anne had flown in this morning, to help us mourn the death of Niall.



" Yes, Come in." I croaked out. 


He had been gone for two day's and I can't help but feel nothing. Nothing. Aren't I supposed to be sad, depressed, angry?



The door opened and a woman about 5'5 walked in, wearing a blue sun dress.  On this day, the weather is beautiful. I wish my mood could fit it.


" Oh, honey. I don't know how you feel, but I truly wish for you to be better, with all of this." Anne sat on my bed, next to me. I felt my heart ache, this wasn't what I had planned to do on my Friday, Mourn for my best friend.


" I can't help but feel like it's my fault, I should have known, For god's sake! I was his best friend!" I didn't cry, I didn't shed a single tear.


" Honey, what happened was not you fault" She wrapped her arm's around me, I took in her kindness, It's what I needed.


" Are you gonna attend the funeral?" She asked, My heart ached. It's his funeral.


" Niall would want me there" I sighed and held in the heart ache.


" On this day, We lost an angel. A man who will never be forgotten-" I zoned out during the ceremony. I couldn't stand listening, I didn't want this to be true.


" Would you like to say a few word's- Samantha" The priest asked, How could I say no?


I stood from the chair and walked next to the coffin. 


" Niall-- he-he was my best friend. I never thought I would have to speak at his funeral. He loved living with harry-" I heard sobbing from the back. I looked to see the boy's in the back, tear's rolling down their cheek's; stern looks on their faces.


"--Harry, he and Niall had gotten closer than ever. It was crazy, as children. We used to play in the play house under that walnut tree. I remember him always having the worst luck, always getting hit on the head. One day-- he -- he started crying, I didn't know what to do." I laughed at the memory. More sob's came from the people he loved.


" He was my first kiss" I laughed, my cheek's turned red from the memory. 


" He was my first crush." I can't believe I'm telling them this, I've never told anyone.



 " I can't believe he's actually gone. " A tear finally came from my eye, the first one, even though it should't have been.


" Now, I could go on and on about the memories we shared, But for now... I'll leave with this. I would have done anything to have been there earlier, to save him from himself. "



I sat back in my chair, his cousin's and friend's patting my shoulder or giving me sympathetic look's. I sat there, until it was over. Not saying a word. I have a feeling that's how this is going to be.





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