Two brothers

Harry and Oliver are two wizards. They both like experimenting in magic. In this first draft we see Harry coming over to Oliver's place to hang out after his girlfriend dumped him.


1. Harry gets dumped

“Oli Oli Oli!” Harry had arrived. He strolled through the front door and put a friendly arm around Oliver. “Hello bro, what you up to.”

Oliver grinned. “You’re just in time to taste my potion.”

Harry’s eyes widened, “you mean it’s finished?” he gasped.

“Yeah,” said Oliver with a small brotherly smile. “I did it.”

Harry’s eyes were alight with excitement. He turned and whispered into his brothers ear: “Am I going to be the first to taste it?”

“You bet.” Oliver winked at him.

“Show me the stuff.”

Oliver led Harry into the cooking room where he tapped three times on the wooden table. A small steel cauldron began to lower itself down from the ceiling via a long chain which clung to its handle. Once it stood before them Oliver unhinged the chain, and it shot back up through a hole in the ceiling. Then he lifted the lid off the cauldron. A steamy pink liquid bubbled around inside. Large yellow bubbles rose up and floated in the air about them.

Harry inhaled deeply, “man that smells delicious; doesn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Oliver agreed, “like roast beef or something.”

“No no,” Harry shook his head. “No, more like a woman’s undies.”

Oliver frowned slightly.

“Yeah, like a woman’s undies afters she’s been wearing them.” Harry sniffed again, “For a very long time, after doing exercise maybe.”

Oliver looked at him.

“Perhaps slightly wet too,” He was nodding.

They both looked at each other and Oliver raised his eyebrows. “Whatever you say; now are you ready to drink?”

Oliver dipped a spoon into the cauldron and held up a small vial.

“Oh forget that,” Harry said. “Put it directly into my mouth.”

“Alright,” Oliver spoon fed Harry his potion. He gave him five spoons of it altogether.

"So now I should be able to change my hair colour just by thinking, right?"

"Once it kicks in, yeah."

"How long will that take?"

“A while. How do you feel?” He asked him.

“Nothing much.”

“Okay, well in a few minutes you should feel-”

“Don’t tell me, I don’t want to know.” Harry warned him.

They both went into the lounge and sat down.

“Okay Harry,” Oliver straightened up on the sofa. “Tell me what you’ve been doing recently.”

“Well,” Harry yawned and slouched. “Tiffany left me.”


“No, it’s now big deal. It was no surprise really; we had just stopped talking.”

“Harry I’m so sorry. There’s no way I saw that coming. When did it happen?”


“Yesterday! Whose place did you stay round at?”

“My own.”

“Did Violet go over?”


“Did anyone?”


“What on Earth man! Why the hell didn’t you come over here?”

“Couldn’t be bothered,” Harry chuckled. He knew that would annoy his brother.

Oliver scowled and punched him on the arm; quite hard. “Well I would have gone round to you, idiot.”

“Hey,” Harry was laughing and rubbing his arm. He could hardly believe what Oliver had just done. “Oh my God; Oli man. I can’t believe you just hit me. You never hit anyone you’re such a little fluffy bear.” He continued to laugh.

“Honestly, where do you get this thing that I’m a fluffy bear?”

“Your hair stupid,” Harry reached up and ran his hand through Oliver’s thick curls. “Why the hell don’t’ I have hair like you?”

“Okay stop changing the subject,” Oliver rolled his eyes. “Seriously man, are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Is that okay with you? Oli you’re a worried wizard you know that. You worry about everything and that is the first time I think you’ve ever punched me. Eh?” Harry jabbed Oliver in the ribs and he jumped about a foot into the air. Harry chuckled. “Eh? Eh? Eh?” He continued to jab Oliver until Oliver punched him again and Harry broke into more laughter. Soon they were both just sitting slumped next to each other; Harry with his head resting on Oliver’s shoulder.

“It’s okay,” Oliver said. “Just remember that you weren’t born with a woman. You don’t always need them.”

“I enjoy being single,” Harry murmured.

“Course you do. And now I’m going to make us some crumpets in celebration okay?”

“Crumpets are rubbish.” Harry’s eyes were closed now.

“Shut up Harry,” Oliver got up and headed to the kitchen while Harry fell into Oliver’s spot. “You love my cooking.”

“Has this potion kicked in yet?” Harry mumbled sleepily as Oliver returned with a large plate of steaming hot buttered crumpets and jam.

“I don't know,” Oliver jokingly seated himself down on Harry’s head.


Oliver laughed at Harry’s muffled groan as he began struggling underneath him. He took a bite out of one of the crumpets and smeared his mouth with butter. “MMM… Delicious.” He said.

“Very funny Oliver, let me up.” Harry continued to struggle.

“I think I have a fart coming,” Oliver teased.

“AAAAARGH…. NOOOO…” Harry began to struggle like mad underneath Oliver. Shaking himself wildly. He was about to pull himself out but Oliver applied his body weight and pinned him down. “NOOOOO…” Harry was going crazy while Oliver was laughing his head off. He eventually got up.

Harry bounced up beside him. His hair was standing on end and his face was red. Then he chuckled.

“Come on,” Oliver said. “You know I wouldn’t fart on you.”

Harry narrowed his eyes. “I couldn’t be sure.”

“What… and ruin the taste of these delectable crumpets.”

“Two things alright?” Harry told his brother. “Your crumpets aren’t delectable and you can’t taste farts.”

“Okay well, number two you might be right on. We can test that whenever you want. But number one you’re definitely wrong.”

Harry took a crumpet from the plate and stuffed the entire thing in his mouth. He then began to chew it frantically, his face was puffy and his cheeks were bulging with food. Trickles of hot melted butter ran down his mouth and large crumbs slipped from his lips falling down his chin onto the sofa.

“God your so messy,” Oliver rolled his eyes.

“When am not?” Harry said through mouthfuls of food and more spilled out. “And I must admit I was wrong. These crumpets are bloody amazing.”

Oliver grinned and nodded his head proudly. “I told you.” He said.

They both leaned back on the sofa and snacked on the crumpets together.

“This is a nice change from yesterday,” Harry said finally. “Actually this is a nice change from usual.”

Oliver put his arm round him and the two sat very close together. “I know it must have been hard,” he said.

“No really it was fine.”

“Course it was.”

“Nah, when you’ve got the best brother in the whole world, you don’t need girls or girlfriends. Or prostitutes.”

“I see, I just take their place is that it. I’m all of them rolled into one?”

“You sure are. You’re the best brother after all.”

“What about Jack?”

“Ah, he’s second best. Tying in there with Ben.”

“But I’m the best eh?”

“You’re the best.” And with that Harry fell fast asleep with his head resting on Oliver’s stomach. After a little while Oliver’s eyes also closed and the plate of crumpet slid from his lap and onto the floor. They both stayed in that position until morning.  







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