My Life As A Mirror

My life certainly sucks, if you think yours sucks more then mine, then your in for a rude awakening.

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1. Chapter 1

Being mirror sucks, all you do is sit on a wall all day, and show people themselves. Pointless, I know. Being a mirror in a public toilet sucks even more, I get drawn on, kissed, danced in front of, smashed and once this weird kid licked me.

I am definitely NOT one of those pampered home mirrors, that get looked after, cleaned every weekend. No, us public mirrors are much tougher then those stuck up home mirrors.

Do you know how many times I've had to listen to people groan, followed by a splash. Or the tinkle of a man peeing in the urinal directly in front of me.

Women only come in here occasionally, mostly by accident when they run out of the room blushing, hoping no-one saw them. But sometimes girls will come in here with guys, yeah, I know, children use this bathroom. Besides it's unsanitary.

I get moved into the girls bathroom sometimes, after I've finished being cleaned. Then I have to listen to hours of girls going on about some girl that "stole" her latest boyfriend. Sometimes they come up real close to me, and I have to look into their eyes. As they apply thick layers of make-up. Hoping they look "natural" HAH! Fat chance cake-face. Then I get fat girls come in and complain about their life. Well get off the couch and put down the potato chips love, 'cause if you don't take a hold of your life then those roles ain't going nowhere.

Though those girls are always a lot nicer then some of the other girls, wearing short skirts and tank tops.

They always ask a friend; 'Does this shirt show off my-insert term of choice-?'

They always reply; 'No,  I think it doesn't show off enough.'

I always want to scream at them to put a shirt on go back home and re think your life entirely.

At the next cleaning I get moved to the guys bathroom, where I have to watch meat heads flex and admire there own abs. Sickening.

But not as sickening when a little boy vomited in the sink right in front of me, it stunk like cheerio's and orange juice for MONTHS!

Anyway my job isn't all bad, at night they lock us up, and we sneak off our wall and have a party with the mirrors in the bathroom next to us.

Once, one of the mirrors in the bathroom next to ours, smashed itself, so the girls had to share a bathroom with the men, probably the worst few days of my life, guys trying to pee in the urinals while girls trying to do there make-up without accidently spying a man's junk in the mirror (though there were those that did look every time a desirable guy walked through the door).

Well, anyway, as you can see from my sucky life, being a mirror does suck and next time you do something stupid in the mirror, think about who might be watching.

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