Theatre of parodies

Your beloved Dexholders are acting out in a series of parodies of movies and even parody of the parody in one-shot styles chapters. Cussing and violence warning. Please do review upon reading. There will be laughter, Romance, drama, and randomness.


7. Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away…..

Star Wars

Episode 3: Revenge of the Sith

THE CLONE WARS rages on as two huge massive armies are at it each other! Oh, I remember you didn't watch the clone wars series by cartoon network which it is owned by Disney. Also, for those known the director from X-men first class will directed Episode 7 while two more are underway.

Wait, you didn't know that two clone wars was made. One was before this film was made which it was awesome because the creator who made Samurai jack and Powerpuff girls. Spoiler, for this last story the shipping is luckyshipping. I made your dreams come true in this story. Also mention, the director wanted to make it longer and dramatic. So, expected OOCness in this story.

Also if you watch the 1st clone wars series, you already knew that the CIS has kidnapped Chancellor Sird, but really the Dark lady of the Sith, who also plan this from the beginning. She need this war for power. After she was "Kiddnapped", the Jedi sent Red and Blue to save the Chancellor…..

After the intro ends, large warships are engage in an epic scale naval battle. As broadside battles do occur and fighter squadrons are dogfighting. Showing two Jedi starfigthers are going to the chaos of battle. One is red and Blue. A Venator class Republic ship destroyed a CIS cruiser with single shot as it was destroyed. More V-wings come out of the hangers which they attacked Droid Fighters. Space Clone Marines are attacking a CIS Trade Federation battleship.

Red: This is the ship where the Chancellor. The one crawling with Droids.

Blue: Oh, this is going to be easy.

At the ship, Droid are there chilling.

Droid Fighter: [GET up you idiots. Republic Fighters!]

They got up and start to attack them.

Blue: Oddball, do you copy?

Oddball (radio): Yes, Red leader?

Blue: Form your squadron with us.

Oddball: Yes, red leader. Set your foils to attack position.

Showing Lance clones in their ARC fighters forming up to them. They set their wings to attack position.

Red: This where the fun begins.

Blue: let us to pass.

The dogfights begins as Lance clone pilots are shooting down large scores of Droid fighters, but slowly being killed by Droid fighters who hold advantage of superior numbers. One of the Droids spotted our Jedi Heroes.

Droid: OH, HELL NO!

It fires four missiles at them.

Red: Missiles! Pull up!

Blue: They overshoot us.

Missiles are coming at them. They split up. Red taken care of them easily, but Blue is having problems.

Blue: That's why I hate flying! And flying is for droids!

The missiles has fired the worse thing can ever happen to a pilot.

Blue: Red, do you see it?

Red: I see them. Buzz Droids.

Buzz Droid: What's up! Motherf&^%ers. We're going to &^%* you up!

They begin to dismantle Blue's ship. They even killed his droid. Red is behind Blue.

Blue: Red, go without me.

Red fires his laser at Blue's ship.

Blue: Red! What you are doing?

Red: Taking off those buzz droids.

Blue: Just go, There's nothing you could do!

Red: I ain't leaving you to die in space.

Red comes up to Blue as he squishes the buzz droids, but one of them enters Red's ship and encounters R2.

Dia: Um, who are you?

Buzz Droid: I am here to kill you!

Dia: I got a joke.

Buzz Droid: Wait?

Dia: Is that your queen?

Buzz Droid: Where?

R2 shocked the Buzz Droid to death.

Blue: Nice work, R2.

Red: General Grievous' ship dead ahead.

Dia: WAIT! What about the shields!?

Blue: R2 is right, the shields are up!

Red: My bad.

Red takes down the shields which they gotten in. They wipe out the droids who were guarding the hanger. R2 finds a panel and shows to go.

Blue: The Chancellor is right in the top. I sense a trap.

Red: What's your plan?

Blue: Sprang the trap.

Dia: Can I come?

Blue: Stay with the ships.

Red: R2, use this.

Meanwhile, at the bridge reveals General Grievous himself?

Koga: Grrr.

He coughs.

Koga: What's the situation, captain?

Carr: Two Jedi landed in the ship and heading to the top floor.

Koga: Just as Count Pyrce, predicted.

He weezes. At the elevators, Red and Blue encounters Droid Destroyers and more droids. R2 have trouble with Super Battle Droids until he killed them. At the top of the tower….

Blue: Lady Chancellor?

Sird: Pryce!

Pryce comes in with two Super battle Droids.

Blue: This time, we do it together.

Red: I was about to say that.

Pryce jumps off.

Sird: Get help, you're no match. He's a Sith Lord.

Blue: My lady, Sith Lords are our specialty.

Pyrce: Your swords, please. I hope we don't make a mess front of the lady Chancellor.

Blue: You won't get away this time, Pryce.

They drew out lightsabers. They clash for a moment.

Pryce: I'm been looking forward for this.

Red: My power has been double the last time we meet.

Pryce: Good. Double the pride, Double the fall.

They continue to clashed, but Pryce pushes off Blue to battle Red. Blue runs up as he cut down two super battle droids. Pryce was about to be overwhelm, he kicks Red and force push Blue into the corner with intent of crushing him. Red attacks Pryce, but Pryce noticed something.

Pryce: You have hate, you have anger. But you don't use them.

Red attacks Pryce with swift and aggressive moves against Pryce as he manages to cut off his hands. Now, Red has two lightsabers pose at Pryce.

Sird: Good, Red. Excellent, Red. Kill him. Kill Him.

Pryce is shocked to hear. Red looks at Pryce with pity.

Red: I can't do it! He's unarmed.

Pryce is glad to hear that.

Sird: DO IT!

Red halts for a moment. He somehow is battling with himself. He got two sides saying to do it or not to do it. At a split second, he cuts Pryce's head. He shows regret.

Sird: You did well, Red. He was too dangerous to be alive.

Red: Yes, but he was unarmed prisoner. I shouldn't done that. It's not the Jedi way.

Sird: It's only natural. He cut your arm and You wanted Revenge. Now, we must hurry before more droids arrive.

As they leave, Red grabs Blue.

Sird: We must leave before it's too late.

Red: he's alive.

Sird: Leave him or we will never make it.

Red: His fate will be same as ours.

At the naval war, the CIS ship they are engages a broadside battle which it is been heavily damaged. But our heroes are in the hallways escapes except….

Battle Droid: Sir, they are hallway 8.

Koga: Activated Ray Shields!

The Ray shields are on.

Red: Ray shields!

Blue: When did this? We're smarter than this?

Red: Let's wait for R2 to come and turn them off.

The door open.

Dia: OH, CRAP! Ouch!

Red: See, no problem.

Yeah, more droids came.

Super Battle Droid: Don't move!

R2 shocks him.

Super Battle Droid: OUCH! BITCH, please!

He kicks R2 down.

Blue: Do you have a plan b?

Red sighs. They had been taken to the bridge.

Koga: Oh, General Blue. I have been waiting for you. So much for the recuse.

He grabs the lightsabers.

Koga: And Red! I thought your reputation will be little be older!

Red: General Grievous. You're shorter than I expected.

Koga: Jedi scum!

Blue: Please, Red. We got a job to do.

Koga: your lightsabers will add to my collection.

Blue: OH, I don't know about it. And This time you won't escape.

Red: R2!


In the panic, Blue and Red grabs the Lightsaber and wipe out Grievous' magna guards in matter of seconds. But Grievous escapes and the ship is about to crash. Also Red save the day by landing the ship in the planet's surface and indeed it was a happy landing.

They all go to the Senate building. Blue went back to the jedi temple, but Red stays until he spots someone. Green.

Green: Oh, Red! I waited so long.

Red: Oh, Green. It feels we been separated for a lifetime.

Green: Oh, I need to tell you something. I'm having your child.

Red: That's wonderful.

Green: What your Jedi life?

Red: I decided to give up on that after the war.

They make out (A lot of luckyshippers cheer for that.) Meanwhile, Grievous fled to Utapau as he contract Lady Sidious.

Koga: Yes, my lady.

Sird: I suggest you move the CIS leaders to Musfar.

Koga: It will be done.

Sird: The end of the war is near.

Koga: but the loss of Pryce?

Sird: His death was a necessary one. I already one. Young and Fresh.

Koga: Ok, I won't comment on that.

Sird: you better. I been waiting for this for over 10 years.

Koga: Wait, what you mean 10 years.

Sird: Forgot what I said and do as I say.

Koga: As you wish.

Back to Red and Green, Red has gotten nightmares about Green dying in childbirth. He goes to the Jedi Temple to ask Yoda.

Emerald: SO, what visions are you having?

Red: Um, death.

Emerald: You or someone else close to you.

Red: Someone else.

Emerald: Well, I don't what to say that you must be careful what you vision. It can lead to the dark side.

Red: Then what I must do?

Emerald: Train yourself to let go!

Red: That's it.

Emerald: how's hard is that? I mean anybody can do it.

After that session, Red finds Blue.

Blue: Red, things are going very well. Master Falkner has taken his troops to Boz Pity.

Red: Anything wrong?

Blue: The senator was asked to vote more powers to the Chancellor.

Red: Would this give us to end this war?

Blue: I don't like this.

Meanwhile at the Chancellor's office…

Sird: I hope you can be trusted.

Red: What I don't understand?

Sird: I need your help. I am appointing you to be my personal representative to the Jedi Council.

Red: Me? A master? They won't allowed it.

Sird: Oh, they will. They need you. More than ever.

At the Jedi Council

Emerald: Who give her the right to put you in here?

Brock: Sigh, we can accept you. But we cannot give you the rank of master.

Red: What? Wait, how you cannot be a master and be on the council.

Brock: Take a seat, Red.

Red: Sorry.

They discuss about the war. Emerald volunteers to go to the Wookie planet. After the meeting…

Red: That's stupid. Putting me in the council without ranking me….

Blue: Calm down. Being on the council is a great honor for your age. The fact that the Chancellor is meddling with Jedi affairs which we don't likeher to do .Also the council asked me to report all her deals.

Red: That's treason.

Blue: We at war, Red.

Red: She's not bad person.

Blue: Red, use your feelings. Something is not right. She was supposed to be out of office years ago when her term is expired.

Red: Why you asking to do this?

Blue: Because I'm not, Red. The Council is.

But after that meeting ends, at night at the Opera premiering the upcoming film, Phantom of the Opera

Red: Needed to see me, Chancellor?

Sird: Yes, I have good news. Our Clone scouts units has found Grievous in the Utapu system.

Red: At last, we can capture that monster and end that war.

Sird: I'm worried the Jedi Council.

Red: Why?

Sird: They are about to betray me.

Red: I don't think….

Sird: Red, use your feelings. They asked to do something that to feel guilty.

Red: I don't know what to say.

Sird: I have a story that a dark lord of the sith can create life and save the one he care about from dying.

Red: Wait? He can save people from death?

Sird: Except he was killed by his own apprentice.

Red: How to know this power:

Sird: Not form a Jedi.

On the Wookie planet…

Lance Clone Trooper: Get Red Unit 5 over here.

At the treetop as the hologram of the Jedi Council are discussing abou Grievous's whereabouts. The meeting ends for Blue to conduct the campaign.

Sapphire: RUBY! Where the hell are you!

Emerald: sigh, nagging couple you are.

Lance Clone trooper: Sir, the droids started their generators.

Emerald: So, the battle begins.

The big epic battle begins. Red and Blue say good byes while Red went back home to Green.

Green: Red, what's wrong?

Red: Blue, came here.

Green: Yeah, he's worrying about you.

Red: I feel distrusted by the Jedi Council.

Green: They trust you with their lives.

Red: Maybe I'm not a Jedi to be. I want more! But I shouldn't.

Green: Don't think that way.

Red: I found a way to save you.

Green: Red?

It cuts to Blue arrived to Utapau where he meets the locals who warned him of CIS are here. He uses his fighter to tell his army to come. Blue uses a local transportation to the CIS base. He overhears them.

Koga: You will be safe there!

Will: Safe?!

Karen: We like to question your ability to keep us safe unlike your failure to capture the Chancellor.

Koga: Don't ever speak to that again. Your ship is waiting.

Blue waits for the CIS leaders to leave to sneak up to Grievous.

Blue: Hello there!

Koga: Ah, Blue. How nice to drop in? Kill him.

Grievous orders his guards to attack him which they got wipeout in matter of a second.

Koga: I have to do everything by myself.

Blue: your move.

Koga: You fool! I was trained by jedi arts by Count Pryce.

He shows four lightsabers to each hand.

Koga: Attack! Blue Oak.

They begin their duel which Grievous uses unorthodox moves against Blue, but due the tv series he fought against him has new tricks against him. He cut two hands until the Republic Army arrives to begin a classical large scale battle.

Koga: army or not, you must realize you are doom!

Blue: I don't think so.

Blue force pushes him and they begin a chase scene. At the Chancellor's office

Red: My lady, I have news that Blue has engaged General Grievous.

Sird: I hope for the best for Blue. Red, I must speak you about something.

Red: Yes, my lady.

Sird: They didn't put you a master because they fear that your power cannot be controlled.

Red: How you know this?

Sird: I know everything even the nature of the dark side.

Red: You know the Dark side?

Sird: Yes, but unlike the Jedi I can achive a power greater than any Jedi. I can prove it to save your wife from certain death.

Red: What did you say?

Sird: Listen to me, I beg you.

Red: So, You're the DARK LADY!

Sird: So, this comes to be. Are you kill me?

Red: I certain do it!

Sird: Good, Hate and anger will make you focus. Then the only makes you no better than me I will say.

Red: I'm going to turn you over to the Council.

Sird: Wise choice. But heave my words, to learn the dark side to save Green.

At the battlefront, Blue catch up with Grievous. They have their final battle until Blue kill Grievous with a blaster thus the end of Grievous. Red tells Brock about Sird which Brock ordered Red to stay until they return. Red stays for a bit until he goes to the Chancellor's office.

Brock with Morty, Bugsy, Stevan arrive at Sird's office. They come to arrest her, but she wasn't going down without a fight. She drew out her red lightsaber as she killed Morty, Bugsy, and Stevan. Now left, Brock vs. Sird which Brock was able to best her in lightsaber combat. Until Red came in.

Sird: Red, I told you it will come to this! The Jedi are taking over.

Brock: The oppression of the Sith will never return. You have lost.

Sird: No NO! You will die!

Lighitng comes out of her hands.

Sird: He's the traitor. I have power to save the one thing you love.

Brock: Don't listen to her!

But the lighting stops which wear her out.

Brock: I'm going to end this!

Red: You can't! She must stand trial!

Brock: We can't do that! She's too dangerous to stay alive.

Red: I need her!

Brock raises his lightsaber to strike her down.


Red cuts Brock's hand until Sird uses her lighting powers to push Brock into his death fall.

Red: What I done?

Sird: Good, you are fulfilling your destiny, Red.

Red: Green. I can't live without her.

Sird: The Dark side is strong with you. But we will work together, we can save her.

Red: I plegde myself to your teachings.

Sird: Good, I will call you Darth…..Giovanni.

Red: yes, master.

Sird: Rise! Since you weren't in their plot, then they are pose the very threat to us.

Red: I agree. Their next move is the Senate.

Sird: Every Jedi including your Friend, Blue Oak is the enemy of the Republic. Do must to done. No mercy! After that, Go to Muststar and kill all the CIS leaders including Will and Karen.

Red: yes, master.

Sird: At long last, the Sith can rule the Galaxy once more and we will have…peace.

Red leds the 501st Legion to attack the Jedi Temple. At other battlefronts, Blue returns to his men.

Blue: Cody, tell your men to go to the higher levels.

Lance Clone trooper: Very good, sir. Oh, I think you need this.

Blue: Thanks, let's have a move on! We got a battle to win.

Blue moves out until Cody got a message coming Sird.

Sird: Commander Cody, Execute Order 66.

Lance Clone Trooper: As you wish, my lady. BLAST HIM!

The Order 66 has begun. At a battlefront somewhere….

Blaine: Come on!

The clone troopers come up to him as they shot him at point blank range without have clear chance. At Fecluia, where Misty leading the Clone battalion until she was shot in the back by the very thing she commanded. More Jedi were killed in the process. At the Wookie world, the droid army are losing until…..

Lance Clone Trooper: It will be done, my lady.

They prepare to kill Yoda, but Yoda killed before they do so.

Sapphire: What's going on?

Ruby: What happen?

Emerald: Trouble I sense. Can you get me out of here?

Sapphire: sure thing. Come on!

They get Yoda out of here as they got him to his escape ship. At the Jedi Temple where students and teachers are getting shot down. Outside, a car happens to drive and lands on the landing pad.

Crystal's Mom: What's going on?

Lance Clone trooper: There has been a rebellion, madam. Don't worry, the situation is under control. Sorry, Madam. I'm afraid you have to leave.

Crystal's Mom: So it is.

When she was going back to the car, she witness a young Jedi got killed front of her eyes as she drives away. Blue manages to escapes from the Clone troopers and drives away with Grievous's fighter. He was contracted by Organa. TO Red and Green.

Green: Oh, Red! What's going on? I see smoke on the Jedi Temple.

Red: The Jedi were launching a coup against the Chancellor.

Green: That's horrible! What are you going to do?

Red: I will not betray the Republic. Our loyalties belongs to the Chancellor. Also the CIS are gathering in Mustatar. I'm going to end this war.

While Red and Green are talking..

Pearl: Is he under a lot of stress?

Dia: Well, he is.

After that, Red left as Blue and Yoda return to the Jedi Temple to recoded the message for Jedi to stay away. But they learn Red's turning to the Dark Side. Blue went to Green to know where he is. But Red already killed the CIS leadership. Blue sneak into Green's ship to the planet where Red is. Red notices Green's ship to face not only her, but Blue as well. They begun to fight, but meanwhile…..

Emerald: Hello, Empress?

Sird: Master Yoda, you survive? But NO matter, you will experience the full power of the darkside!

She threw electric lighting at Yoda.

Sird: Ha Ha ha hahahaahaha. I waited too long for this! My little shorty!

Emerald: What did you say?

Sird: At last the Jedi are no more.

Emerald: No one ever dared called me…..SHOTRY!

He force pushed her.

Emerald: I got to end this.

They drew out lightsabers out just like Red and Blue in a lightsaber combat as well. As for Sird and Yoda are battling each other with everything they got, but it was too deem unavoidable to Sird's force powers to avoid the senate chairs. He tried to hold one of her Electric force powers against her. But the reaction was strong for both of them to hold. It was Yoda lost the fight to Sird as Troopers arrive the scene. But Yoda escapes. Sird has told one of the troopers to prepare a ship for her.

At the lava planet, Red and Blue continue to battle each other as the whole facility was going down. They continue to duke out as one tried to outbest each other in brutal fight. Blue notice that Red is not Red anymore, but something else more evil.

Blue: Red, I failed you. I failed you.

Red: I shouldn't know the Jedi are going to take over.

Blue: Red! Sird is evil!

Red: In my point of view, the Jedi are evil!

Blue: Then you are lost!

Red: This the end for you, my friend.

Blue and Red clashed until Blue jumped.

Blue: It's over, I have the high ground.

Red: You underestimated me!

Blue: Don't do it!

Red jumps to Blue until he crops off Red's legs. Red rolls down to the Cliff near the lava. Blue grabs Red's lightsaber.

Blue: You were the chosen one! It said to bring balance to the force, not leave it to darkness. I love you as a brother.

Blue left Red to suffer as the lava burn him. Blue takes Green's ship as until Sird came.

Lance Clone Trooper: Mam, this way!

Sird: There he is. He's alive. Bring a medical crew, right now!

Lance Clone Trooper: Yes, mam. Let's go!

At the same thing, they repair Red and Green gives birth to twins whom she named Luke (silver) and Leia (Crystal) as at the same time, the rise of Darth Giovanni.

Sird: Giovanni, can you hear me?

Giovanni: Yes, mistress. Where is Green? Is she okay?

Sird: Can I tell you the good news.

Giovanni: ?

Sird: You got new limbs and arms, but the bad news is… your anger, you killed her.

Giovanni: No! She was alived, I felt it!

He goes on a rampage which he looks at the Droid.

Droid: Please don't kill m…

The droid is killed.


At the ship

Emerald: We must split the twins where the Dark Lord can't sense them.

Crystal's mother: I will take the girl. I always wanted a daughter.

Blue: Then I will take the boy to relatives he has in Tantoonie.

They all agreed what to do. Leia is taken to Alderean with her new adoption mother and Luke is Tantoonie with his uncle (Bill) and aunt (Daisy). Meanwhile Giovanni and Sird are building the….DEATH STAR! Along with Moff Tankin (Archer) to oversee the construction. Thus ends the prequel trilogy. NOW TO THE BEST PARTS, Epiosde 4 to 6.

Author's Notes: Damn, 16 pages long I been writing. Now we will go all in intermission for those take part in this. For our next cast will be prepared for this. It has been long for our prequel trilogy. I hope you enjoy this. Remember, Review it after you read it.

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