Theatre of parodies

Your beloved Dexholders are acting out in a series of parodies of movies and even parody of the parody in one-shot styles chapters. Cussing and violence warning. Please do review upon reading. There will be laughter, Romance, drama, and randomness.


6. Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones

"A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away…"

Star Wars

Episode 2: Attack of the Clones

In these dark times, the galaxy is at…..Oh, hell no! Do I have do this again for another 4 for films? I hate this job. Why I have explain what's going on? Have no one read the expansion books after the first film?

Also I heard that George Lucas sold Lucasfilms because a bunch of piss fanboys over the first film to Disney. I don't like fanatic fanboys either to shippers. I only do the shipping for those who want to.

Anyway, this film plotline will be short due unpopular it was back in the days because the so-called originals that fanboys claim it's better than the prequels. Are you high?

Oh, the whole story short. A bunch of planets are leaving the Republic because the "Republic" doesn't care of their system. Wow, doesn't sound United States today about Government size and don't letting the Government to help the people.

Anyways, they call themselves the Separatists and the Republic has called a special session to create a armed forces. After a 1000 years of peace, they want a army. But no, there are idiots don't understand it's just they puppets to Darth Sird, who plan this from the beginning.

After the intro ends, into planet Coruscant. Green, now a senator of Naboo is heading to the Senate to oppose the War Creation bill.

Green: Oh, clothes!

I said, you oppose it!

Green: Fine. I think we can talk this over. You know those cartoony misunderstanding.

But earlier, She was nearly killed in a assassination attempt. The Jedi decided to sent Blue and Red to guard Green from their killer. At Night,

Lorelei: I hit the ship, but they used a decoy.

Lance: Then we have try something else. Use them. Be careful, they're poison. My client is impatient. There will no mistakes this time.

Well, the big chase scene begins when it fails while Blue and Red catched the Assassin.

Blue: Who were about to kill?

Lorelei: A senator from Naboo.

Blue: Who sent you?

Lorelei: Ain't telling nothing!

Red: OK, who sent you? Tell us, Now!

Lorelei: Alright, there's a bounty hunter called…..

A dart hit her while the bounty hunter runs away. She dies as Blue took the dart off. They report the news to the Jedi Council. Red is assign to protect Green while Blue is sent on a mission to find out. While Red is away, Blue after intense research founds the planet where it came from.

Blue: So, this is Kamino, huh?

He was guided to the Ruler of this planet.

Agatha: I hope you're please that all 200,000 battalion units are ready to go while a million more underway.

Blue: What you mean? What unit?

Agatha: Is Master Sifo-Dyas part of the jedi Council is he not?

Blue: To be frank, he is killed 10 years ago.

Agatha: Oh, so sorry to hear. I was hoping to be glad for the army we built.

Blue: For who?

Agatha: For the Republic. Let me show you.

She guides Blue to the cloning facility to see entire armies of Lance clones. Doing the inspection, he was told of a bounty hunter named Lance. They meet with Lance with his clone son. After they meet them, Lance decides to leave with his son. But Blue caught them leaving except they got away. After a brief fight scene, he followed them into the planet Geonosis.

But Blue reaches deeper into the industry plant, he also finds a massive droid army in the works.

Pyrce: We must have Commence Alliance into our group.

Will: What about Green? Is she dead, yet?

Karen: We won't sign the deal until we get her head.

Pyrce: I'm a man of my word. Patience, my friends.

Blue discovers the plot of Count Pyrce with Trade Federation, but he got caught. He was able to get the message to Red and Green who happen to gotten too close with each other. I mean too close. They brought R2D2 and 3CPO along. They tried to save Blue, but failed badly. Moments before that…

Blue: Count Pyrce? I beginning to see the patten here.

Pryce: This is madness. It's gone too far.

Blue: Why are you doing this?

Pryce: Short story is that the Senator is corrupt by Darth Sidious. But the Jedi have their vision clouded. Join me to destroy them.

Blue: Fat chance.

They decided to kill them at the Arena. Everything was going fine until…..

Pryce: Master Windu, how nice to join us?

Brock: This party is over.

Every Jedi present is there to save the day.

Pryce: Brave, but stupid. You're outnumber over times.

Brock: I don't think so.

Pryce: Will see?

Reveals as they unleash the entire Droid army where the epic fight begins. Meanwhile at the battlefield,

Dia: Sigh, Why I must do this?

Pearl: R2! Get this thing off me!

Showing a super battle droid is ontop of him.

Dia: I gotta do this.

Pearl: What you're doing? My head!

Pop! R2 drags it to his original body. And repairs him. At the battle, the Jedi are surrounded by droids until the cavalry arrives with Lance Clones. They save them until the real Ultimate battle begins as two armies clashed with other in a epic scale.

Will: How the hell they got an army that huge?

Pryce: This isn't possible? How the Jedi can acquire this army so quicky?

Will: Send all droids into battle!

Karen smacks him in the head.

Pryce: No, that's not will be needed! Get your ships ready.

They leave. But Pryce grabs a hologram showing the…..Death Star. The battle favors the Republic as they mow down Droid units into bits. Red, Blue, and Green's gunship caught Pryce in their sights which Green accidently fall down, but Blue don't want Red's personal feelings get in the way. They found Pryce in his hanger.

Red: You're going to pay for the Jedi you killed today.

Blue: We will take this slow. You go to right while I take….

Red: I take it now!

Blue: NO, wait!

Pryce using his lighting powers to disable Red and fights Blue which he was wounded by Pryce's lightsaber until Red intervene. But he lost his arm in the process. Until someone appears…

Emerald: So, you have join the Dark side. Did you?

Pryce: Bitch, I'm more than that.

They do a force power contest which no one can overtake until they epic lightsaber fight. But Pryce escapes with attempt to kill Red and Blue while Emerald save them. The Clone Wars has just begun as the 3 years like in real life will follow.

Unknown to the heroes, Pryce goes to one planet where the Jedi didn't know is Coruscant. Pryce meets the Dark Lady of the Sith. Darth Sird.

Sird: is everything according to plan?

Pryce: Yes, war has begun.

Sird: I will use this way to gain me one thing. Unlimited Power!

Author notes: This is the shortest chapter I can do. The next one is more than the other 2 because Episode 3 is the best one out of the three come out and then the Episodes 4,5, and 6 are coming. I hope you enjoy this. Review…or else! After the 3rd Episode, it will bring you by Pokémon Association. But in real life, it's a video game. Except in video games, Pokémon are not robots nor slaves, friends and partners. We don't want extremes like Team Plasma or Team Rocket. We can share together.


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