She's too young: The painful truth

What if everything everyone warned you about, was true? What if it was too late to turn back? And what if the painful truth let you drop to the floor, wishing everything was the same again? Would you give it a second chance?


8. Wrecked life. Keeping safe.

Weeks passed by quickly. Late July set in and the leaves turned a bright orange. I managed to ignore Hanna and Louis for nearly four weeks now. It was a world record, and the prize was absolutely nothing.

I oddly felt worse than I already was. But the smile on my face told otherwise. I was passing my classes with perfect scores so far. And Professor Sims was harder than ever on me. The second I'd snap the slightest attitude I was quickly put in check. I began to grow eager for winter break and the end of this semester. That was three months away. I dreaded the wait.

It was mid afternoon on Friday when my mom called me. It was hot and I laid uncomfortably on my bed. I was apprehensive to answer the phone at first. But it was nice to hear from home.

"How are things?" She asked nonchalantly.

"Things are okay.. Just busy with homework and countless exams." My complaining reminded me that I had an early pre-final tomorrow morning. The professors here were tough. And though semesters were ending in three months, they wanted to make extra sure we were prepared for our final exams. It was quite helpful actually. I had no room to complain.

"Make any friends?" By friends she strictly meant female pals. I was eighteen years old and she still tried to keep me away from boys. Hilarious.

"Actually, I've just been hanging around myself lately. It's nicer that way." I poorly convinced myself that loneliness was a luxury.

"Oh Ellie. You need to stop being so antisocial."

I hadn't mentioned to her the fact that Louis was taking classes here. And that I was roomed with his girlfriend. And that this was all a sick coincidental plan that earth created to try and tear me down. Antisocial wasn't what was wrong with me. It was far worse.

"I know mom." I replied, clearly annoyed.

"Well anyways. Have you spoke to your father?"

My father. I hadn't thought about him since I got here. Suddenly I wondered if something was wrong. Mom never asked about him. I chewed on the beds of my fingernails and mumbled no into the phone simultaneously.

"Martha is having the baby next week.. I thought you should know. He is going to be your half brother after all."

"By blood he's my half brother and by terms he's nothing to me. That goes for Martha as well. Just because her and dad are married doesn't mean I want any part of them." I was aggravated. Obviously I wasn't going to be happy with the situation. My dad cheated on my mother with her own sister, broke both of their hearts, and knocked up another woman in the long run. I was unhappy with him.

"Oh Ellie. Don't act like that. What if it were Nicky, or Lily or Sara? You wouldn't treat them like that." I don't know why she was taking dad's side, and I don't know why she was so calm.

"I love them. You know that."

"And you'll love your new sibling." Mom confirmed. I sighed.

There was a long pause before mom spoke the bad news I felt was coming.

"Michelle is being released from her mental facility next week as well. I just want you to be aware." Her voice was shaky. Chills formed on my arms.

"What? Why?" I shouted.

"Martha signed release forms. She won't do you any harm, El."

"Mom she tried to kill me. Do you understand that? I literally drove a dagger through my stomach because of her. And now because she endured a few years of therapy she supposedly won't harm me? Are you serious? She's crazy!" I was yelling now. I was nearly sure Hanna could hear me from the other room. I didn't care.

"Ellie the restraining order is still up. She doesn't even know where you are, anyhow. Stop stressing. I have to go. I have a business meeting in ten minutes. I love you. Goodbye."

I had no say so in anything and my life was a wreck. I thought that a call from home would make me feel a bit better, and instead it caused me to feel a million times worse. I needed to hit someone. Or something. I wanted to pull all my hair out and scream as loud as I could. But I bit my lip and held it all in because that's what people with strength do. After five minutes of rapid and violent thoughts, Hanna took it upon herself to invite herself into my room without consent. I said nothing.

"Bad phone call?" She asked carefully. I shrugged.

"Why are you so mad? You've been ignoring me for weeks." She leaned against the doorframe.

"I don't know. Maybe I've been living through hell and my life is a complete wreck. Or, maybe I'm only asking for attention. It's your call." I threw her the ultimate bitch pitch.

"Maybe you are asking for attention. But it's none of my business. I just want to make sure you're okay."

"Well I'm not okay, Hanna. If you wanted to know." I was sitting up now, glaring her straight in the eye.

"I just feel bad for you. You don't even have friends. It's kind of sad." Hanna's lack of smarts made me sick to my stomach. She tried to sound like she actually cared. I didn't buy her bullshit still. She was fake. She was wrong.

"What's kind of sad is the fact that you pick on the poor new girl. You make her feel like home the first day. And the next you talk shit about her behind her back. That's sad, Hanna."

Her eyes dropped with guilt.

"Ellie I-"

"Don't. I don't care what you have to say." I spat. I didn't care how rude I was being. She was rude. And I was in the worst of moods and right now wasn't the time to backhand a sympathy plead. Hanna was a fake person. She was plastic, cold and hard. I guess she eventually got the hint because she drooped her head and left my room slowly.

I groaned with aggravation. Outside the room I heard Louis open the door to our dorm, his footsteps leading to Hanna's room and the door closed after several minutes. I couldn't stand being here when he was. So I escaped.

Fortunately the elevators were up and running again, and we were consent to ride at our own risk incase of other complications. I took the risk and used the elevators anyways. It saved more than five minutes of walking up and down the complicated and steep stairwell. If the elevators broke down it'd be my luck. But so far nothing had happened.

When I was out on the campus, I immediately spotted the boy I ran into weeks ago through the rain. I learned his name was Liam. He met me half way through the grass, waving with a smile on his face.

"Hey Ellie." He nudged my shoulder. I noticed it was a habit of his. I laughed a little.

"Seems like every time Tommo visits your dorm you make an escape." He chuckled.

"Just want to give them privacy." I lied.

"Yeah seriously.. So anyway, there's a party going on tonight at my dorm. Want to come?"

This was the first time I ever got invited to a party. Let alone by a guy who was actually cute. I felt gritty and excited. I played cool. "Yeah sure I'll see if I can make it."

"Alright. So maybe I'll see you." He waved goodbye, jogging to a group of guys playing football in the quad. I thought about it for a moment. Liam and Louis were roommates. Louis claimed that Liam was no good for me. Louis was an asshole. And evidently so was Liam. I was invited to a frat party. Frat parties were where people got drunk and hooked up. I didn't drink- except for the occasional wine and champaign held at dinner parties. And I certainly didn't hook up with anybody. Louis was the only person I'd ever kissed, let alone slept with. I wasn't that naive. Liam I'm sure had good intentions inviting me to his soirée. But I had intentions too. And they were to stay home and read Ethan Frome while the rest of the campus was put at risk for transmitted diseases and alcohol poisoning. My bed sounded like a nice place to be tonight. And I couldn't be more excited for Louis to exit the premises soon enough. If making friends meant putting myself and my dignity in trouble and danger, my dorm was the best place to be safe. I wasn't trying to play any death games tonight. Riding the broken elevator was a risk enough.

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