Harry & Pepper.

a series of one shots involving Harry and Pepper.

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5. Say Goodbye.

"C'mon Babe! You’re leaving tomorrow, come out with us."

"I'm not in the mood, Harry. Go have fun with the boys; I'll still be here when you get back." Harry just wasn't giving up, the same conversation starting about 20 minutes prior.

"Pleeaaassseeeee! It won't be the same without you there." Harry's pleads were ringing upon deaf ears, right until he pulled me by the waist, our bodies so close that only our clothes were between us. Delicate pecks were placed upon my jaw, right up to my ear. "I love you." I smiled, knowing he was using those words in persuasion. My hands travelled to his neck as he tried to use his lips to strengthen his argument.

"I love you too." He smiled against my lips, fingertips pressing deeper into my hips as he kissed me harder. I placed a hand on his chest, increasing the distance between our bodies slightly. "But I'm still not coming out with you." I smiled, pecking Harry's lips one last time before turning around to continue with what I was doing before Harry's interruption.

"Noooo." Harry whined before wrapping his arms around my waist from behind. "I'm just gonna have to change your mind then, aren't I."

"Harry." I warned, but it was no use. Harry had already flipped me onto his shoulder and thrown me down onto the bed.

"So, we can do this the easy way… or the hard way." I laughed as he hovered over me, pinning my body to the bed. "You can say that you're coming out with me and the boys…" His breathe tickled the skin of my neck, making my body tense beneath the boy. The feeling of his lips turning upwards told me he knew the affect he was having on me. "Or I'll have to take matters into my own hands."

Teeth nipped at my skin, my hands finding their way to the hem of his t-shirt. As he blew his air over my skin, forming goose bumps, I knew I couldn't wait any longer. Harry's t-shirt was lifted swiftly above his head, his lips pressing a forceful kiss onto mine as soon as he was shirtless. His hips descended onto mine, all of his weight on his forearms beside my head. I gasped, my breath caught in Harry's mouth, when I felt the large bulge pressing onto my right thigh. He chuckled, knowing what I was thinking about.

"That's how much I want you right now." My teeth tugged hard on his bottom lip as Harry moaned, slowly grinding his hips into mine again.

"Pepper." He breathed, tugging at my top. A small nod of my head gave him the permission he needed, my t-shirt landing on top of his on the floor. Our lips reattached almost instantly, my legs hooking around Harry's waist in the process. He hummed against my mouth as I wound my fingers in his curls, tugging gently as his tongue fought mine. His strength over powered mine when I tried to pull him back down to me, his lips leaving mine momentarily. He gazed down on me, bringing his bottom lip between his teeth.

"You're so fucking beautiful." His harsh tone made the words sound so much sexier; his body lowering as he sprinkled delicate kisses to my exposed chest, right up to the edges of my bra.

"I'll come with you." I knew I had to say something before anything else happened. I didn't know if I was ready for that just yet, especially with the fact that in 24 hours we wouldn't be seeing each other for 16 weeks. "One drink though, that's it." He frowned, as though he was upset with my words.

"I don't want to go out anymore. I'm quite happy here… on top of you." He smiled at the last words, knowing it would provoke the reaction it did, a slap across his arm.

"Come on, I wanna say goodbye to the boys properly. One drink."

"One drink." I kissed him one more time, before shuffling from underneath him and running to the bathroom.

"I call showering first." I laughed to myself, knowing that because I had already turned the lock that he wouldn't be able to fight me off.

"Why don't I just join you?"

"Piss off, Harry."

 

***

 

We stayed true to our word. One drink, a laugh with the boys and the rest of the team, which mainly consisted of stupid stories of my time with them as well as them taking the piss out of me, but I still loved them. Harry made it very clear to me he didn't want to be there, his constant attempts at stroking my thigh and grabbing my bum telling me he would rather be at home continuing our earlier activities. And that's exactly what we were doing right now. My hands struggling to undo Harry's jacket as he kicked the front door shut, a single hand being taken from under my thighs to slide the chain across. His lips were forced back against mine as soon as his task was completed, pushing my body onto the new cabinet in the hallway , which held the new landline, so he could rid me of my coat with ease. Well, I guess I'll have to buy Harry yet another new phone for his house, the one that had been bought only a few weeks prior ending up with the same fate as its ancestor.

This wasn't supposed to happen. I was truthful when saying I didn't think I was ready, the long distance that was going to be between us for the next few months almost creating a barrier against anything of this nature in my mind. It was only a gentle kiss, shared between us as Harry pulled up outside the house, that led to this, neither of us wanting to part lips. Harry even picked me up and carried me out of his car door so he wouldn't have to stop kissing me. "Stay with me." The words spilt from my parted lips, Harry's teeth nipping at my neck as he unbuttoned my shirt as quickly as he could.

"Forever." Harry's breathy whisper sent shivers down spine, the clothing being thrown off my shoulders before Harry scooped me back up under my thighs.

"Don't forget about me when I'm gone." Harry didn't seem fazed by this little conversation, his moving lips contrasting my still ones because of my thoughts.

"Pepper. I love you. You're on my mind every second of every day. I'm not going to forget about you. I promise." My eyes were fixed in Harry's above me, his arms letting my drop to the soft confines of his sheets as he spoke. My grin matched his, spread further across my face as I jabbed the indent in his cheek. He batted my hand away playfully, leaning down to push his lips onto mine.

"I love you too." Swiftly removing his shirt from his torso, my hands traced patterns across Harry's bare back, occasionally scratching with my nails as Harry peeled my jeans off of my legs, lips still moving in sync. His hands stroking up my legs as he made his way to the button of his jeans, but I couldn't leave him to do it all by himself. Using my feet as an aid, Harry's jeans joined mine on the floor, a smirk on both of our mouths. I knew what was coming, but that didn't stop a gasp from escaping when Harry hooked his fingers under the band of my underwear.

"It's alright." He stopped his movements, sitting up on his calves to look at me. "I'm not going to do anything if you don't want me to." His hands moved from my underwear, holding up his weight either side of my head as he leant down, lips brushing. "I'm not going to fuck this up again."

His whisper made my heart flutter, the words holding so much meaning to me. Short pecks were dotted all over my face making me laugh, Harry's smile being felt against my skin. I stretched my arms out to the side, finding Harry's hands and sliding my fingers between his. He sat back on his legs once again, eyes fixed on mine as I moved Harry's hands around, kissing each finger as I played about with them in my hands. I found his hands fascinating, had done since the very first day I met him. I would always find him watching me whenever I would play with them, almost as if he found what I did amusing. His whole body tensing around my legs when I moved his hands back down to the band of my underwear was noticeable. My confident look didn't falter, a smile on my lips as I drew circles on the back of Harry's hands with my thumbs.

"Are you sure?" It amazed me that Harry was all up for this less than a minute ago, and one little gasp from my lips completely changed his view on the activity. I nodded, using all of my force to tug Harry back down to me, planting a heavy kiss on his lips. Desperate for his touch. "I'll be gentle, Pepper." I smiled up at him as he leant over me to the bedside table, a chuckle escaping his lips as I pressed a kiss to the underside of his arm. Digging around in the drawer, a silver packet was held between his fingers. Harry smiled at my briefly, gently kissing my pouted lips before adding the contraception to his body.

 

Sex with Harry was nothing like I imagined. What I had expected to sharp, quick thrusts were slow and pleasurable. He even waited before moving his hips, giving me a chance to adjust to his size before starting. Kisses were pressed to my lips in attempt to distract me from the initial pain, but once that had disappeared, I began to enjoy it as much as Harry obviously was. I pushed back the damp curls that had stuck to his forehead, sweat dripping down his chest as I dragged my nails across his back. My back arched as I felt myself reaching my high, the profanities spilling from Harry's mouth telling me he was in the same predicament. One particular deep thrust caused me to go over the edge, crying out in pleasure as Harry hit just the right spot for me to let myself go. The feeling inside of me told me Harry had to, his thrusts from then on slowing even further and becoming sloppy. Once he had regained enough energy, he rolled off of me and layed beside me. The sheet Harry had pulled over us before we started had become tangled with our naked bodies. I rolled onto my stomach, head facing Harry as he lay on his back, panting heavily.

"I can't believe you just gave me that and are going to leave me on my own for 4 months." His head fell to face me, smile large on his face. "I'm going to be so sexually frustrated it's unreal."

"But it means when you come back, it will mean more to you." I pushed myself up onto my elbows, hovering over Harry and placing a gentle kiss on his nose. His eyes drooped, head rising up from the pillows to meet my lips before falling back down.

"Let's sleep, Beautiful. We've got a big day tomorrow." I nodded, rolling over to face away from him, his arm taking its usual place over my waist and pulling me into his body. I could feel his lips behind my ear. "Unless you fancy round 2? Because I'm all up for that."

I knew that a smug grin would be plastered across his lips as I chuckled.

"Good night Harry."

 

***

 

I sat with Harry and the boys in their dressing room backstage at the arena. I didn't have any work left to do, everything else was down to my uncle seeing as he was back and had no further need to me on tour. I had been offered a job as secondary sound engineer (a posh name for my uncle's assistant) but I declined, knowing there was other work back at home that I could be doing. Uncle David even offered to not go back to his job until the tour was over, allowing me to do the time that was originally planned for me, but I didn't accept that either. That would be stealing my uncle's job from him, and I couldn't do that. He had worked too hard to get to where he was.

The boy's support acts were currently on stage, doing their pre-tour sound check before the first show tomorrow. Harry and the other boys had refused to let me leave until they were done even though I didn't' have anything to do, saying they all wanted to be with me for as long as possible.

It is extraordinary the relationships I had created with the whole crew in 2 months, the ones built with One Direction and their band being the strongest. Harry's fingers ran through my hair, my body resting between his legs as we sat on a sofa playing Uno with the other boys. Josh, Sandy, Jon and Dan had had to go work on stage for a bit, so it was just the 6 of us, Harry insisting to be on my team as we played.

"Go for the blue 7 next." His whispers sent shivers down my spine but I quickly shook them away to place the card on the table.

"Uno."

"How do you always win?!" Zayn shouted, throwing his pile of cards on the floor as he stormed over to the fridge. He always was the sorest loser.

"They're ninjas, Zayn. You should know that by now." Niall chuckled, following the boy towards the food source. I smiled at their conversation, turning my head slightly to have my lips caught in Harry's. It took my completely by surprise, having to put my arms out behind me to stop myself from falling over the edge of the sofa. But I failed, Harry's arm catching my waist before I fell backwards onto the floor. I clutched onto his shirt, pulling myself back up to meet him.

"Are you finished?" Harry just chuckled at my 'near death' experience. I bit his nose softly in response, and he pretended to be in pain even though I knew he wasn't. Our gazes locked, the laughter dying instantly between us. Harry leant down slowly, as if he was testing me to see if I would pull back, or challenging me to see if I would close the gap between our lips. A smirk played on his lips as he saw my head move at the same pace as his. We were interrupted when our lips were barely a centimetre apart, a click causing our heads to turn towards the sound. Liam and Louis were looking straight at us, a mixture of innocence and guilt spreading across both of their faces. I was about to question their expressions when I noticed Liam's phone in his hand, and I knew exactly what they had been doing.

"Give me that phone right now, Liam." I jumped out of Harry's grip, but Liam was too quick, jumping over the back of his own sofa before I could even get past the table. When I finally caught up to him, I launched myself onto his back, my ankles locked around his waist as I reached forward to attempt to grasp the phone out of his hands.

"Lou, catch." The phone was thrown to Liam's band mate, his arms wrapping around me to prevent me from getting down. All the while, Harry lent against the counter, one foot crossed over the opposite ankle as he took bites out of an apple. He made no attempt to help me in my quest, instead laughing at my actions.

"Thanks for the help here, Harry. Couldn’t do this without you." Sarcasm dripped from my mouth as I bit down on Liam's neck. Not in a sensual way, but in such force that his grip would leave my body to help soothe the pain.

"You're welcome, Beautiful." A cheeky wink was given before Harry directed his words to Louis.

"Here, g'is it." He held out his free hand to catch Liam's phone, continuing to take bites from his apple as he scrolled through what I presumed to be the pictures Liam and Louis had just taken of us. I scowled at him, lifting myself up onto the counter beside him. I peered over his shoulder, taking a look at the screen.

"Some of these are actually really cute." Harry whispered so only I would be able to hear his soppy remark. I pushed him away, him chuckling as I did so.

"I hate you, Liam." I walked off as both he and Louis tried to tackle me in a hug, my best shot at trying to seem pissed off at them. They all knew of my pure hatred to taking unexpected pictures. I can’t deny, some of the shots of me and Harry did make us look like a perfect couple, but that didn’t take away the fact that Liam and Louis went against one of my unwritten rules.

"You love us really." Louis said, both he and Liam wrapping their arms around my side as Louis wetly kissed my cheek.

 

***

 

"Alright boys, you're good for today. See you for the show tomorrow." Cheers came from all of the boys, all except Harry. I had said my goodbyes to most of the crew, along with Josh, Jon, Sandy and Dan, whilst the boys were doing the technical run through for tomorrow. Harry came over, arms circling my waist as he brought me into his chest.

"What can I do to make you stay? To make you come on tour with us? You know there's always a job here. Everyone loves you."

"You know I have to go Harry." It seemed silent around us, like nobody else was in the room. I tightened my grip around Harry's neck. "Maybe some time apart will do us some good, anyway."

I was pushed away, tears brimming in Harry's eyes as he held me away from him. "Wait, what? Are you breaking up with me?! Please, Pepper. Don’t say you breaking up with me."

I was shocked at Harry's sudden outburst, realising that the way I had said things made Harry's worries seem reasonable.

"No! Harry, I'm not breaking up with you." Harry's features softened, the tears in his eyes falling down his cheeks as he tried to process his words. "I'm just saying, we were kinda forced upon each other. We've been living together since the day we met, don't you think we just need a bit of time on our own for a little while."

"But I don't want some time on my own. I want to be with you every second of every day for the rest of my life, Pepper. I love you. Can you not see that?"

"I know you do Harry. C'mon, let me go say bye to the boys and then we can go."

"I'll be in the car." Harry's reply was blunt, almost harsh, as he pushed past me and slammed the door open. I knew he was upset, but it wasn't like I wasn't going to see him ever again. There was no need for all of this anger.

I turned to find every pair of eyes in the room on me. I forced a smile, trying to make my last few moments with everyone for a while the best.

 

I ran to jump on Liam's back, him obviously not expecting the sudden impact as he grasped the underside of my thighs, a grunt leaving his mouth. Everybody else had gone back to their previous conversations.

"I'm gonna miss you, Li." I smiled into his neck, placing a massive, sloppy kiss there. He groaned trying to wipe the saliva away with his shoulder, but failing miserably.

"Be good, yeah." I grinned, knowing he was referring to the many times I had been roped into pranking him by the boys. Liam hated them, but was all up for pranks when the target was another member of the crew.

"When am I ever not good, Liam?" I could see his eyebrow arch in disbelief. I jumped down, gave him a quick but tight hug, and went to plan how to shock the other three.

 

I crept up behind Niall, a finger pushed to my lips to tell the person Niall was talking to not to voice my presence. As soon as I got close enough, I directed my fingers to Niall's sides, pushing into his skin. What I can only describe as the most high-pitched scream that has ever been made by a man came from Niall's mouth. He squirmed out of my hold as I fell to the floor, laughter uncontrollable.

"I'm never talking to you ever again." Niall stated once I had regained myself. He knew I knew where his weak spots were, and I knew he hated it when I used them to my advantage.

"That's never gonna happen, Niall. We both know you love my cooking too much to stop talking to me." He pouted, knowing my argument was true, and ran back over to me, squeezing my into a tight hug.

 

I moved onto Zayn, walking into his open arms.

"I love how out of everyone here, you're the most normal, yet you're still totally insane." I mumbled into his chest. Pulling away, I found him using a couple of strands of my hair as a pretend moustache against his lips. I grinned, my point being proven.

"I'm gonna miss you, Pep." Zayn put on an over-dramatic sad face, pretending to cry in the process.

"You were the life and soul this place, and nothing's ever gonna be the same without you." His over-dramatic face and voice was still there as I raised an eyebrow at him, causing us both to break out into laughter. Zayn pulled me into another hug, my lips quickly pressing to my cheek as I pulled back.

 

For the first time today, it wasn't me to be saying goodbye. Instead of just walking over to me normally, Louis decided to be unique, running towards me and knocking me flat out. He landed on top of me, earning a loud grunt from the both of us.

"Don't leave us Pepper!"

I giggled, lifting Louis head to face me from being pressed against my chest.

"I'll miss you too, Lou."

"Of course you'll miss me, everyone misses me." A wide grin spread across Louis' face, almost ear to ear. He stood up off of me, holding out his hand to help me up. As soon as I was on my feet, Louis arms wrapped around my waist, lifting me off of the ground slightly; my cheek pressed to his as I whispered in his ear.

"Look after him for me, Lou. Make sure he doesn't do anything stupid, please."

"Of course." Tightening my grip on his neck, I gave him a quick peck on the cheek before him and Niall lead me outside to an awaiting Harry.

 

It was only at this moment when the tears started to fall, realisation that I wouldn’t be seeing the people who had become my family, who I had spent basically every waking moment with, for another 4 months finally dawning on me. Harry stayed in the car as I said my final goodbye to the boys, unlocking the door as I reached it.

"Be good. Don’t kill anyone. Don’t kill yourselves. Do amazing tomorrow night and at all your other shows, yeah?"

"Yes mum."

I scowled at the boys, but couldn’t help but laugh when I realised some of my final words did sound like those of a nagging mother.

"And look after Harry, for me."

"Only if you come back soon, Pepper. Just because you're with Harry doesn't mean we all haven't learnt to love you."

Wise words from the Irish one, as Harry would often say.

"Niall, you don't have to learn to love me. My loveable-ness comes naturally." I grinned and hooked my arms around both of the boys' necks, kissing their cheeks in turn.

"I really am gonna miss you guys."

"Go. Harry's waiting." Louis kissed my cheek gently as he spoke, Niall following as they both pulled away.

"I'm gonna Skype you all every night."

"Don't make me carry you into that car, Pepper."

I turned, taking those few steps to the car door, before spinning back around.

"Tell everybody I'm gonna miss them and I love them."

"Pepper!" Their voices were stern as they spoke in unison. I put my hands up in surrender, sliding into the car and waving at the boys one last time before they walked away.

When I turned around, Harry's eyes refused to meet mine. As I slid my hand to meet his, I look at him all over. His face looks dead straight out of the windscreen; eyes look as though they are focused on something that isn't even there. Tear stains can be seen upon his cheeks; he has obviously been crying, but there are no tears currently falling. One hand keeps a tight grip on the steering wheel, knuckles white with the pressure he is applying to the plastic. The other is poised upon the key in the ignition, as though he is just about to turn on the engine. I pry his hand away from the steering wheel, sliding my fingers between his and squeezing gently as I bring them to my lips.

"Harry. I love you."

"Then why are you leaving me?!" His words make me jump, the anger laced in them mixed with the sudden noise.

"Please, Harry. Don't start. You know I have to." I sigh, dropping our entwined hands to my lap. Harry quickly realises the position of them and pulls his away, the actions leaving me hurt slightly.

"No. You don't have to. You've been offered more than one job to stay with us on tour. You're good at your job, and everybody loves you here. Yet you still choose to spend 4 months without me instead of with me. So no Pepper, you don't have to leave." His eyes burned into me, his anger shown through both his voice and his facial expressions. He sighed, turning back to the position he was previously in and running his hands through his hair.

"What if was the other way round? What if I hadn't been offered a second job? You would still have to go on tour and I wouldn’t be in a position to ask you to stay. I'd have to learn to live without you for a while, so why can't you do the same?!" It was my turn to get pissed off now. He had no right to be acting the way he was.

"That's different."

"No it's not. You're going to be busy with the boys, and I've got stuff to do back home. It's not like we're breaking up, is it?" Harry didn't reply, instead glancing at me out of the corner of his eye. I think he thought I wouldn't notice. Well, he was wrong.

"Just drive me home."

 

***

 

I don't know when I fell asleep but when I woke up I had the worst ache in my neck ever. I rubbed my eyes, stretching my back a bit before sitting up straight in my chair. A crash as I moved told me that my phone had fallen down the side of my seat.

Harry was driving in silence and waited until I had fully woken up before reaching out to rest his hand on my thigh, like he always would whenever we were in a car together. We hadn't spoken before I fell asleep, not making any contact with each other at all, so this surprised me.

"Have you calmed down now?"

"Yeah. I'm sorry I over-reacted. I just love you so much and I'm finding it hard to come to terms with the fact I'm gonna have to live without touching you or kissing you for four months." I accepted his apology, showing my acceptance by sliding my hand in his.

The rest of the journey wasn't long, only about 20 minutes of so, and neither of us spoke. I didn’t know what to say, so instead showed my love for the boy by placing delicate kisses all over his hands and playing with his fingers like I always would.

 

Neither of us made an effort to move when Harry pulled up opposite my house. I smiled slightly when I saw my small, grey car sitting in the drive way- it had been a while since I had driven that thing- and made a mental note to thank Uncle David for driving it back from London for me. A miniscule sigh of relief left my lips when I realised none of the other cars that our family owned were in the driveway, knowing that I would have some time on my own to grieve the separation of me and my boyfriend. It would be such a shock to the system, having had Harry there beside me at almost every moment of the day to having our only option to talk to him being through a screen. It was going to be hard.

I was snapped back from my thoughts by Harry's voice.

"Pepper?" I focused my eyes to him, surprised that he was standing next to the opened passenger door with his hand held out for me, instead of sitting beside me like he was. The look on his face told me everything, his voice being normal but his eyes showing his true expression. They were cold, empty. As if their usual colour never existed. As if there was nothing going on behind them.

"Are you coming?

"Uh, I… yeah." My voice was timid as I took hold of Harry's hand as an aid to exit his car. That contact was immediately dropped; his moving to the small of my back as he guided me up the path to the front door, mine frantically searching through my bag for my front door keys. I stuck them in the key hole, turning to face Harry before I entered the house.

"So…"

"Goodbye, Pepper." Harry's lips pressed to mine, no movement involved. Just 3 seconds of contact between us. I attempted to deepen the kiss, but he brought my hand back down to my side when I tried to take hold of his neck. I even tried to bring him in for another kiss when he pulled away, but he had turned and walked away before I could do so.

Was that it? We weren't going to see each other in person for 123 days and that was it? He had been so upset less than 5 hours before at my choice to not stay with him, and a measly peck was what we had left it on?

"Harry?" My voice cracked as I questioned Harry's actions, tears almost falling from my cheeks as he turned to my voice. He stood at the end of the path, face changing expressions probably a thousand times in less than a second. It looked as though he was questioning himself.

After what seemed like a lifetime, but in reality was only around 10 seconds, he sprinted towards me. Hands cupped my face as he forced his lips to mine, no hesitation in the addition of passion and love. My fingers locked around his neck, his moving down to my waist to pull my body closer. The kiss slowed, oxygen entering our body when our mouths parted occasionally. Lips brushed continuously, foreheads pressed together.

"Why did I have to fall so goddamn in love with you, eh?" A chuckle fell from Harry's mouth as he spoke. I left him to answer the question himself as I pushed my lips back onto his.

"If I don't leave now, I don’t think I ever will." I nodded, understanding of his situation. All of my want to have Harry to stay with me had to be pushed aside. I couldn't make him cancel the tour for my own needs. As I ran my hands down his arms, a thought flashed through my mind. What if I took the job offer? It meant I could stay with Harry, we could be together still. But then I remembered the job I already had lined up for me. I couldn’t cancel on them at such short notice.

So many things I couldn’t do.

"I really do love you, Pepper. Nothing will ever change that." I reciprocated his words, kissing him one final time before he left again to his car. My body stayed frozen, watching him as his eyes never left mine whilst he entered his car. I watched him drive out of sight.

 

"I love you." I whispered. Nobody was around so no one could hear me, but I didn’t care. I turned on my feet, falling through the newly opened door and fell to the floor in the hallway. My knees came to my chest, and I cried. 123 days to go.

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