I'm sorry! I wish you were still here to tell you I love you (Niall fanfic)

Laura and her sister Anais(anna-ees)move to London with their friend Yessika. They met the boys at their concert where Niall and laura instantly fall in love. So Niall and Laura have been dating for a year now. They were truly a happy funny and loving couple. But what happens when a tragic accident splits the couple apart!?

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12. chapter 12

A few months later....

Niall's P.O.V

After a few months to myself, I finally have the strength to go visit Laura's grave. I get out the shower and start to dress. I take a quick look at myself in the mirror and fix my hair, I turn and grab my keys and my guitar. I head down stairs and into the kitchen and quickly eat a bowl of cereal. Anais walks in, sees me and looks away while making a cup of tea. Her eyes are red and puffy, I wonder why, she's been okay the passed few weeks. I put my bowl in the sink and walk out, I hear her start to cry and walk back in.

"Are you okay?" I ask.

"Yeah, I'm fine" she says sniffling.

"Okay turn around and show me that you're fine" I say knowing perfectly well she's not fine.

"Niall r-really I'm f-fine, don't worry about me" Her voice shaking.

"Anais turn around" I sternly say.

"S-See I-I'm fine" She tries to smile but fails. I walk over to her and hold her tightly as she cries even more.

"What's wrong?" I ask her she cries more "Is it Laura?" She shakes her head. "Then what is it?"

"Y-You" she says.

"Me? What about me?" I asks confused. She pulls away and takes a few deep breaths and calms herself down a little.

"I feel like I've lost you, you've been really distant lately and I get that you need your space and all, I really do but I also need my best friend. You've been mad at me for god knows why.I've already lost Laura and the thought of losing you, I just couldn't handle it anymore, I broke down" she says showing me her arm full of cuts.

"You promised me Anais!" I shout grabbing her arm.

"Yeah well you promised me too! You promised you'd always be there for me,but you weren't!" She shout tears rushing down her face.

"I'm so sorry that I wasn't there for you" I say holding her tight. "I know saying sorry isn't enough but I promise to be there more,okay?" I say wiping her tears away.She nods. "I need you to do something for me, I need you to go tell Liam"

"Wait no,why?" she asks confused.

"We both know he deserves to know" I say.

"O-Okay, I'll tell him" she says looking down.

"Don't worry everything will be okay but I have to go" I say picking up my guitar.

"Where are you going?"

"To go visit Laura"

"Do you want me to go with you?"

"No I have to do this by myself"

"Okay, say hi to her for me"

"I definitely will" I say walking out.

..............

I arrived at the cemetery, luckily it stopped raining when I got here. I take a deep breath and get out of the car and open the backseat to grab my guitar and the flowers I brought for her. It takes a few minutes to get to her grave and when I finally do, I kneel down and clean off her stone and put the new flowers in.

"It's been a while since we've talked hasn't it" I say while tuning my guitar."I hope you're doing okay" I say hoping for a response, but I get nothing.

I let out a sigh"I came here not only to visit you but I think it would be best if I started to move on, I hope you understand. I also came to sing you a song because I still remember always singing you to sleep or when you would get upset with me."

Say Something-A Great Big World

"Say something, I'm giving up on you

I'll be the one, if you want me to

Anywhere I would've followed you

Say something, I'm giving up on you

And I am feeling so small

It was over my head

I know nothing at all

And I will stumble and fall

I'm still learning to love

Just starting to crawl

Say something, I'm giving up on you

I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you

Anywhere I would've followed you

Say something, I'm giving up on you

And I will swallow my pride

You're the one that I love

And I'm saying goodbye

Say something, I'm giving up on you

And I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you

And anywhere I would've followed you (Oh-oh-oh-oh)

Say something, I'm giving up on you

Say something, I'm giving up on you

Say something..."

I hear crying behind me, I turn and around and see Laura sitting there.

"I'm so sorry for hurting Laura, that was never my intension. That decision I had made to sleep with Yessika instead of telling you what happened was the stupidest decision I had ever made." I say tears starting to fill my eyes.

She smiles,"I appreciate your apology but I'm not mad at you anymore, I realized I had hurt you more than you had hurt me. At first when I left I was really sad for leaving you but then I got angry when I remembered what happened so I had made it a goal for myself to make you feel the pain I felt when I found you with Yessika by haunting you and causing you to drink and hurt yourself. I'm so so sorry for making you do those things. I'm sorry for hurting you Niall" she says tears pouring down her face. She grabbed my hand and put it on her cheek.

"I've really missed your touch" she says holding my hand close.

"I've really missed yours too" I say rubbing her cheek with my thumb.More tears fall from her eyes." What's wrong?" I ask

"Its just that I won't be able to feel your touch again" she says getting up.

"What? Why?" I start to get up

"You said you wanted to move on, so soon you will find someone and forget about me" she says with tears in her eyes.

"That's not true, I will never forget about you. I love you and only you. Yes I will probably find someone and love them but I will never love them the way I love you. That will never change." I say trying to comfort her,but it's true I can't love anyone as much as I love her.

"Promise you'll come visit?" She says holding out her pinky.

"I pinky promise I will" I smile while holding her pinky with mine. "I love you Laura" I say tears starting to fill my eyes.

"I love you too Niall" she says crying and disappears.

I get back to my car and close the door, tears start pouring down my face as I come to a realization that she's really gone and I finally got to say goodbye to her.

........

I arrived home and walked in and up to the bathroom. I can't move on, not after how Laura reacted. I have to be with her and only her. I will soon be with you Laura. I put a arbor blade and a bottle pills on the counter and looked at the mirror.

"Niall what are you doing?" Laura asks.

"I'm coming to be with you" I say taking the blade.

"Niall stop!" She shouts as she smacks the blade from my hands.

"Remember you telling me you wanted to move on? What happened?"

"I lied! I don't want to move on, don't you see how miserable I am with out you?!" I say taking as many pills that could fit in my mouth and swallowing them.

"I'm going to go get help" she says."I got Anais"

"Niall open the door!" Anais shouts outside the door.

"Niall let her in you can't be with me!" Laura says with fear in her eyes

"Go away! I want to die!" I shout taking the blade and cutting.

Anais's P.O.V

"Anais, it's Niall please hurry"

"Laura?"

"Yes it's me"

"H-how? Where are you?"

"No time to explain, Niall's in trouble please come!"I could hear the urgency in her voice.

"What's wrong with Niall!?"

"He's trying to kill himself"

"What! Where is he!?"

"In my bathroom"

I rushed over to the bathroom and turned the knob, dammit it's locked.

"Niall open the door!" I shout

"Go away! I want to die!" He shouts. I see blood coming from inside.

"Niall please! Open the fucking door!" I shout tears falling down my face. I try breaking down the door but nothing happens. I pull out my phone and called the ambulance. I hear him scream.

"Niall stop! Do remember this morning? You promised you would be here for me! You promised dammit!" I shout crying.

"I'm sorry" he says softly.

"Niall wake up!" I say and try breaking down the door again and finally I get in and see him passed out with both of his wrist cut open. I run to him and grab the first aid kit and start to wrap his wrist with gauze, I see pills on the floor

"Dammit Niall" I say as I stick my fingers down his throat."Spit them out Niall" I do it once more and throws up the pills and starts coughing.

"I'm sorry Anais" he says and passes out. I hear the paramedics come up stairs, they pick him up and took him into the ambulance. I got in with him and rushed to the hospital.

.............

We arrived at the hospital and rushed him in. The nurse held me back and told me to wait and that she would let me know what happens. I sat at the waiting room and started to cry.

"Babe what happened?" Liam comes in with everyone."and why are covered in blood?"

"N-Niall t-tried t-to..." I couldn't say it. How could I say that my best friend tried to commit suicide. I looked up at them and seemed like they understood and started to cry. Liam hugged me as we both cried.

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