The Difference between you & I

Skylar's struggle with anorexia and self multination has gotten worse throughout these past few years. Skylar's start off with his junior year is introduced with a new jock in school. Roman Monroe.
Skylar becomes head over heals for this boy, but will things take a turn for the worse or for the better?


This is boyxboy. So it will contain sexual scenes.
Yes, they will be graphic. (Reason why I have made this Yellow) But girls on this site are like twelve and writing the same shit & making it Green, so.

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4. Chapter 4.

Surprise!! Yes, I did this before my hiatus ended. I felt as if I left many of you unsatisfied and disenchanted. I decided to write as much as I could to release another chapter. I will not give up on my first story. Yes, I will still write during my Christmas break!

Hoping for the positive feedback! 

 

Wednesday; another tiring day at school. Two more days until this week ends, stay strong, kid. Remember: same shit, different day, right?

  Skylar scoffed at the idea as he walked home from school. Roman hadn’t been to school, so the day was lonelier than usual, somehow longer as well. No secretly smiling through passing periods or softly sweeping each other’s fingertips as they ran into each other. The mystery just wasn’t there.

 

As he finally reached home, Skylar automatically skipped lunch. He never ate once he got home. He sticked to water, apples and sometimes orange juice. He knew of course, that starving wasn’t the correct thing to do, but every time he took a bite out of anything else, he became more anxious, as if he’d be, Skylar the fat ass again. 

The worries of course, were always there when his mom offered dinner out. He always forced himself to eat, but Skylar had his ways of getting through with it. Every night mom took him out, Skylar grew nervous with each bit he took, so once they landed home, Skylar would automatically force himself to hurl in his restroom. This didn’t necessarily make him feel better though... He knew it wasn’t supposed to be this way.

****

 

“Spam, spam..” click click Skylar scrolled down is email, throwing each email down to the ‘Spam’ folder.

 

“Jonathan Quinn? The fuck is this...Dad? In January of this year, hell! Ten months?!” 

click

 "Skylar... For all I’ve ever asked was for you to grow up safe. I love you, unconditionally... Never forget that, but the choice you made were uncalled for. God doesn’t accept people like you, I incest you find away to find yourself a lovely girl. There’s plenty out there. You’re confused, that’s why I still have hope and savior for you, son. Little league wan’t the best when you were nine, but it gets better... I don’t exactly know what I think of you anymore. Yes, my thoughts in you have changed, but no, I do not hate you. I love you. You’re just not worth the time, honestly. I hope your mom knows what to do with you. I cannot live in a house with a homosexual... I am more than disappointed in you. I hope your mom can deal with you with your illness, she knows what is best. Yes, it’s an illness and believe me, it can be cured, I’ve seen it happen on TV and magazines. We’re Catholics, Skylar. God loves you, but not your sin. I sin as well... It was wrong for me to hit you, it was. I just couldn't control the anger in me when you told me the terrible news. When you find yourself a beautiful girl, call me. We’ll definitely restart. Me, your mom, and you. You bet! Hopefully you read this email when you can.

Dad, (714-949-6912)"

Skylar read the last numbers as the reflection of his laptop screen hit his glassy eyes.  He slowly closed the laptop lid and closed his eyes. Tears streamed down his cheek, he was shaking, not because he was in total pain, but because he was hurt, angry. He clenched his fist and groaned.

“I FUCKING HATE YOU," he yelled. 

He stood up and kicked his table. He sighed one more time, and pulled his hair slowly as he maniacally laughed.

            “I love you unconditionally... Fucking liar... Called me a faggot before..”

His laugh became a soft sob.

“...before you left.”

 Skylar scrambled through his clothing drawer.

Blade, blade...

Skylar found his object. A sharp, small, pencil sharpener blade. Tears streamed down his cheek as he shut his eyes tight. Trembling couldn't describe the movement his body was making. The cold blade hit his warm, tender thigh. Intersecting with another of his scars, making the blood stream longer. He hit the blade on other sides of his thigh until his tears and blood became dry.

"God damn..."

 Skylar rubbed his eyes softly with his small palms and placed the blade back inside the drawer. He didn't clean the blood off his thigh, he was exhausted.He was too tired for anything. He turned off the lights and wrapped himself in comfort of his blankets on his bed.

Sometimes I feel like only you understand, bed. You're there for my comfort and you never leave. 

Skylar smiled softly as his thoughts soon stirred into Roman.

Roman... You're the only one who knows. You're the only one. Its funny how it almost feels like I'm cheating on Claire. I don’t know why I feel so damn calm about you knowing. As if I trust you, without completely knowing you. But that's not even my situation... Why did you take it so, calmly?

 

All Skylar knew about Roman was that he was best friends with his worst enemies, in football, and amazingly sweet deep down, he knew it. Skylar just hated the fact that Roman only watched when Rob and his friends messed around with him. It made him feel taken advantaged of. Although nothing had happened since their kiss, Skylar just felt used, and he also felt like he had been exposed. Worries came when he noticed that he didn’t know Roman. Roman could’ve easy told Rob about what he saw! Jesus Christ! 

Keep calm... Breathe. He couldn’t have! If he’s smart, I’m guessing he should’ve thought that if he said something, I could’ve exposed him.

Please don’t let him bring me down, I trust him. I don’t know why, but I do. I’m never easy on trusting people, but there’s something about him that just feels so right and I don’t want to be wrong. 

****

Lunch was almost always equaled to Roman. It was the time where I could space off into space and my entire mind would be focused on only him.

“Aye, boy! Big news!” Claire exclaimed.

Angelo smiled uncertain, but nodded in response. 

“So?” 

“I asked her out, she said yes!” She exclaimed. 

“Megan? Wow, that’s good! Happy for you beeb.” 

Skylar smiled calmly as he sat with Megan and the group of Claire’s lunch group. 

He really was happy for the both, Claire was a person who was always away from the group. She liked being deserted, so, seeing her with someone made Skylar happy. Claire needed to be around someone who made her heart melt.

“Ugh, ew,” Megan said in disgust as she read the school newspaper. 

“What up?” Skylar questioned.

“Laila Sprouse, the hot cheerleader, she disgusts me.”

“Okay, that made little to no sense,” Skylar laughed. 

“Her personality, it’s snobby and... just rude,” Claire stated.

“Really? I never encountered her, ever. I just see her around, and agreed, she’s a babe, but I’m not surprised. It goes with the stereotype, typical cheerleader.”

Megan scoffed, “Must already be giving head to the entire football team. Or, she’s dating one... Or has a thing for one!”

Skylar chuckled nervously... Roman was in the football team.

As the bell finally rung, Skylar gave his goodbyes to Claire’s friends and calmly walked to sixth period. He couldn’t help, but to over think the idea of Roman dating a girl. 

It was bound to happen, Roman took a lot popularity Rob carried. He took over and moved into quarterback, spacing Rob out and making move into lineman.

Angelo took a seat and waited patiently for Roman. When the tardy bell rung, the door pushed open, Roman was tardy.

“Tardy Roman, that’s your second, next one will be sent into administration.”

“Sorry ma’am!” 

Roman chuckled and smirked at Skylar in the back, which made him melt. 

“Yeah, yeah. Drop off your girlfriend earlier, or with other classes, just don’t be late to my class, I will not tolerate it.”

The class laughed and of course, Skylar wanted to do everything but that, although he chuckled. He was stronger than that. It was just a joke... A simple comment, right?

****

After school, Skylar hung out with Claire at the mall. She wanted to buy something for Megan, and of course, he was there for her company. As they entered into Urban Outfitters, Skylar went his own way, searching something for himself.  As he turned to see Claire, he noticed the one and only, Laila Sprouce, in the arms of his affinity. She was holding onto him just the way he always wanted to.

Skylar automatically turned back to his direction, furious.

How fucking cliche of this to happen, it was really bound to happen, it’s for the image, it has to be.

Skylar speed walked to Claire and tugged her arm.

“Can we go?” 

Claire gave him an odd look, confused.

“What the hell, why?” Claire was about to narrow her eyes on him until her eyes stumbled upon Laila and Roman. And of course, she smiled.

“You’re jealous,” she giggled and playfully hit Skylar on his shoulder.

“Man, you haven’t even done anything with him,” she exclaimed.

 Skylar frowned and looked down at their feet and looked at her again. They had a minuet stare until she finally decided to put the dress back on the rack and rolled her eyes.

****

“Why didn’t you tell me?!”

Skylar picked at his ice-cream cup and shrugged.

“I don’t know... Maybe I’ve been too busy thinking about being his. Lusting, loving, all of the above. I’m sorry Claire. I should’ve told you. I know you would’ve told me if something like that occurred to you.” 

“I’m actually over it, I’m just not over the dick move he made. He kissed you, literally gets your hopes up, then does this?” 

“It’s for the image, I know it...”

Claire scoffed and rolled her eyes.

“So it’s fair?”

“No.”

 

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