Diana

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  • Published: 21 Sep 2013
  • Updated: 25 Jun 2014
  • Status: Complete
~A girl once told me to be careful when trying to fix a broken person For you may cut yourself on their shattered pieces~

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13. This Broken Skin Can't Hold Me Forever

Diana's POV

 

He continued to look at me while I had my epiphany. He opened my eyes and turned the tables  around completely with which I praise him for.

 

Everything came crashing down and I started to cry in hysterics. I dropped the blade from my hand and felt a pair of strong arms wrap around my shoulders. I embraced back and let my sobs suffocate into Liam's shoulder. Almost every one of our encounters had ended up this way and I can't help but feel that it's my fault. Because it is.

 

We stayed like that until my breathing was normal and my flow of tears subdued. I kept my head rested on his shoulder while he gently swayed us back and forth. I had forgotten what it felt like to feel loved, something so gentle and subtle. I wouldn't miss it for the world. If it wasn't for him, I would have lived my life oblivious to the fact that something so precious still even existed.

 

Ever since I had met Liam his presence alone has made me rethink entirely of what my identity is. Before I use to think that my scars defined who I am. But then he showed me ways to look at myself in a different perspective. He showed me that it's not always what happened in our past that defines us, but how we handled it.

 

By now we were both laying on the couch just enjoying each others company. I had tried thinking of many ways as to thank Liam for everything he has done to me. I just feel bad because I know we can never be together. I want to, but we just can't. He could be just doing this out of pity. Or maybe he really does have a heart of gold. Either way, if we would ever be together I would feel that my assumptions and thoughts would get the better of our relationship and get in the way, preventing us from showing any proper affection.

 

"Some of my friends had invited me to dinner with them. They're bringing their girlfriends and I just wanted to know if you'd like to be my date?"

 

I was laying sideways on his chest and I could feel the vibrations of his voice the whole time he spoke. I looked straight ahead pondering my answer. Should I go? What if his friends don't like me? What if I embarrass him with just me being there? The thing about Liam is that he thinks that I am this strong, independent, and careless girl.

 

If only he knew.

 

I may come off that way but deep down I still get insecure, I still have my doubts, I still over think every bad decision I ever made. I'm human. I've just been keeping this image up for him because I'm afraid that he'll see the real me and think that I'm weak and not worth his time. But the more and more I spend my time with him, the weaker I become and the farther my walls come down.

 

I want to be that strong person that Liam has in his mind. I want to not care what other people think of me. I want to feel loved and not be judged. I want to scream at the top of my lungs and shout who I really am. I want to be myself and not care if people would accept it or not. I want to be that.

 

But I've come to realize that the only way to be that is to let go of what happened and move on. This broken skin can't hold me forever.

 

"Sure Liam, I'd love to."

 

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