The Cuts On My Wrist

STOP BULLYING!!!!
Hey everyone. This is a collection of people's stories about being bullied or bullying and also some advice and quotes and little things like that are included to help stomp out bullying. Please read and help us stop The bullying... every little bit counts to a better future. If would like to be heard please email me at rebecca.herkess@education.nsw.gov.au and you can have a voice as well:) WARNING. This story may be a little depressing to those who are like me, and are bullied.

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31. I need to clear my head

So Its me Amber. This is a bit about bullying but it's my story in More detail plus a few other things. 

So basically I am not like the girls at my school- They wear so much makeup and roll up their shorts and wear clothes two sizes two small. That's not me so therefore I am not pretty to them. 
Basically last year I started feeling worthless. It started like this-
I was hanging out with my group of friends and one of the girls I didn't mind but I wasn't best friends or anything was hanging with us. She seemed nice. we were talking about how pretty the girls at school were and she turned around and said to me. "Oh don't worry Most ugly people get prettier when they get older" and thats what made me change. 
I started wearing so much makeup and became like those other girls I even got one of those snotty popular girl attitude some of the girls had. My friend mentioned that I had changed so I got rid of the attitude and just wore a lot of makeup. 

My friends started to hang out with other people a few months later. I had gotten replaced. I soon had no one I could go to. I lost one of my best friends how was like my big sister. she was the sweetest girl ever. But I don't know what happened she just stopped talking to me and when I tried to talk to her she would have a go at me for no reason so I stopped talking to her. I soon tried to make new friends but failed. I wasn't a popular pretty girl therefore no one really wanted to be my friend. 

I felt like self harming. I was scared that I was going to so I hid anything that I could use to do that. I stayed away from scissors and Knifes and any sharp object for a while afraid I would start. Instead I started to write up a diary. Each entry was each day. I wrote in my diary every single day as things seemed to get worse. 

Soon there was just one guy who would keep picking on me. He picked out everyone of my flaws. I put on a fake smile and carried on even though it broke me inside. I cried myself to sleep every night and acted strong everyday. Each day he broke me more and more. I dreaded even going to school. One day things started getting worse. The name calling got worse and he started trying to break my stuff. One day he became successful with that. I went an reported him so something could be done but they did nothing. He came up to me one day and said stuff to me and that was it... I had broken down. My so called best friend even took his side. I felt alone. My brother and his friend actually came down and helped me. 

I never felt safe going to school since no one did anything to stop this kid. Even now sometimes I still feel like self harming but I know about the butterfly project and stuff to help me. 

I still hate everything about myself and I still feel alone...

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My story in more detail. 
No matter what I do for some people like being there when they need me they are never their for me. No one gets me anymore. I can't talk to anyone about my problems because they don't understand. This is why I am doing so much about bullying because I want to help you all who feel this way. You are not alone even though (like me) you feel that way...

Thanks my little Butterflies xx

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