Fake smiles

Fake smiles can hide so much. Simply hiding your pain from everyone else with a quick lift of the corners of your mouth. The worst part isn't not showing what you feel to other people. It's that no one notices when you do. No one does. Never. They assume because you aren't crying all the time, or quiet, or wear long sleeves and wear black everyday everything is perfect. But it's not. Nothing about you is. It's just the opposite.


5. Broken

Fake smiles:




This chapter may be triggering. Please never do what she does in it. There is always a reason. You all have your flaws sure, but you are still beautiful the way you are <3 xx


Lauren POV:

Greasy fried chicken. Green beans coated in butter. Bread full of carbs. And Cokes.

All that just for dinner. And I can't even make up an excuse to not eat. Just great... The only sound is Sydney talking to Ethan, her imaginary friend. "Yes, this is our new house for now." She informs him.

Skylar starts bragging about all the colleges sending her letters to apply. Greg is going back to his college next week. He is twenty one, and been going there for three years. I get left alone with the new family and my stuck up family.

Very slowly dinner gets finished, and I do my chores. Finally! I scurry up to my room and go into the bathroom. That was the most food I've had in years. I strip off my clothes until I am in my underwear and stand in front of the mirror.

I knew I wasn't perfectly thin but I never thought I was fat. But now that's all I see when I look into the mirror.


Eww how am I so ugly? Look at my nose! Gross I look like a whale.. but there is a way to fix that.. No! I promised myself I would never do it.. but promises are meant to be broken..

So I do it.

I did the thing I swore I'd never do. I made myself throw up. I feel better though.. what's so wrong with it? Why shouldn't I do it? No one would care..

I take off my underwear and hop in the shower. While washing up I see something it. My razor. My heaven.  I grab the one thing that keeps me sane and slash it across my wrist. Blood gushes out, just to be met by the running water rinsing it away.

I hop out, dry up and out on pajamas. Slipping into bed I realize something.

I am broken.

And no one can fix me..








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