Can You Be Trusted?!

Second book to: If You Really Cared--------

Carter still hasn't found the meaning of her life. She's still learning to trust the five boys she has always known as bullies. Now that her family is all dead, in jail, or hates her guts she has to turn to someone. Who will it be?

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3. Chapter 3

Carter's POV

"Could you speak for us?" he asks. "What?!" I practically holler at him.

 "Sweetie, your the only direct family alive of Kyle's... Could you share some memories for us? Maybe some traditions your family shared?" the sermon giver, I don't know his name, asks again.

"Yea she can." Logan answers before I have a chance. I glare at him.

"Great!" the preacher smiles and walks away.

"What the hell?!" I scowl at him. "Carter they were going to make you anyway," he rubs my upper arms from behind and warms me. I lean back against him. "Fine," I give in.

"But." I turn to face him and he looks into my eyes. "If I get to teary, will you come up to me? Stay with me?" I ask and he nods.

"Anything for you!" he kisses my forehead. I blush and take his hand. "We best take our seats.." I say and he leads me through the doors into the room. I'm surprised at the flowers that line the walls. I never knew this many people cared. I read through some of them and showed Logan the one from Jacob.

"So sorry for our loss," Logan reads the tag attached to it out loud. "Our?" I laugh at how stupid it sounds. "It's a message for me," I say.

"Somehow, he knows I know about us being brother and sister or he's just trying to get to me..." I say.

"Probably the second... I mean he is in jail isn't he?" Logan asks. I just nod and pull his hand as we take our seats at the very front of the room. Charlotte takes the seat beside me and we wait for the sermon to begin.

Amazing Grace begins to play and I'm embraced by Logan's familiar arms. I reply the hug and yet we never pull away. We stay embraced until the preacher calls me to stage. His arms release me and I'm wrapped in snow. The cold frost eats at my skin. My legs are forced to move and the wooden feel on my fingers burn holes in my skin. I grip the podium tightly I stare ahead at the miles of white, snow, and sadness. My life flashes before my eyes and the hole in my throat grows bigger allowing even less oxygen to come through.

I gulp. The pat at my back from someone pulls me back into reality and I stare ahead at the faces staring back at me. Glaring. Waiting for me to mess up. Waiting to beat me. Hurt me. Break me. I find Charlotte and Logan looking back with different eyes than the others. Charlottes gives a thumbs up and Logan winks at me before giving me a reassuring nod.

I re-plant my feet and search my mind for a memory of Kyle. One that I can share, not something about the times he saved me from Joseph or beat up someone for picking on me. The thought comes to me that he has lied too. All my life he must have known something about our real family. He had to. That's why all that happened with Jacob. I swipe these thoughts away and concentrate on the crowd before me.

"Well, he was my brother... I guess we had a lot of memories made together," I try to laugh.

"I always remember the time he gave me the unicorn pillow pet I still have today," I remember that I left the unicorn at Louis's.

"He got it in America... I remember I was twelve," some of the crowd smiles but the others act as if they're dummies and make no facial expressions at all.

"He had told me that anytime he wasn't there that I could just sleep with that and he be back before I knew it," I tell only part of the story and smile at the thought. But this time I cant keep the tears from showing at the brim of my eyes. A few aws came from the crowd and I looked down and fiddled with my fingers. I look up to see them. All dressed very nice. Taking their seats in the very back row and he notices I'm looking directly at him. Louis. He sits by Harry, Niall, then Zayn, and Liam.

I gulp and look back to Logan. The tears come faster. I realize that if the boys wouldn't have shown up I might be able to pass over the memories of Jacob, and Joseph, Kyle's death.

"I remember when one night I had woken from a nightmare, I climbed in bed with Kyle. Like a normal brother who would normally get mad, he didn't..." someone laughs but I pay no attention.

"I told him I couldn't sleep so he pops popcorn, makes us smoothies, gets some pancakes and syrup and brings them back to his room. We watched movies and ate, until I finally fell asleep in his arms." some more aws came from the crowd and only more tears come from me. I look at Logan as if begging for him to be by my side.

In moments I feel his presence beside me and I sigh. I intertwine our fingers and look back to the crowd.

"My brother, Kyle, was always the type of person you could trust. He always had laughs and then he could be serious." I wipe the tears away and speak without thinking.

"And for that I am truly grateful because if it wasn't for him I could have never, and I know a lot of people say this, but I mean I could have never made it through the first seventeen years of my life and all the things it's brought along with it," I finish. I keep my eyes off of the section where the boys sit. Logan leads me off stage and we take our seats be Charlotte and she hugs me.

"Here..." she hands me a tissue box and I take one helplessly. Logan takes one too and helps by gently rubbing away any excess mascara or makeup. Good thing the mascara Mrs. Jane put on me was waterproof.

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