You're Not Alone (Niall Horan/One Direction)

Mia Alexandra, prefers to be called Alex because she got bullied because of her unusual name, now she doesn't just get bullied because of her name. No her life was ruined by her father, he got arrested and put in prison for murder. Her family left her on her own when she needed them the most. Her two best friends turned against her and started bullying her. Will she be pushed to complete destruction? When One Direction turn up at her school, will she let them in and allow them to fix her?

Contains: bullying, self harm and suicide attempts but it also contains crazy moments, sleepovers and love

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9. The truth about me

- chapter 8 -

"ok, I'm going to start from the beginning, you need to know the truth about me and also I need to know if you are going to leave me because of what has happened because you think I'm the same. Well remember this one thing I'm not!" I took a deep breath and calmed my nerves before I told them everything that could potentially ruin my friendship with them. 

"It all started when I was 12, my father started going out and he did dangerous things with a group of his so-called friends, he started trafficking drugs and selling them, he would beat people up if they even dared to look at him in what he thought was the wrong way. When I was 13, on my birthday actually, we got a knock on the door, I answered it thinking it was my aunties and uncles that were on the other side of the door, it wasn't. It was the police, they asked to see my mother as they had to tell her something important, this important thing they had to tell her was that my father had been arrested for murder, I guess someone talked back to him and he didn't like it, he had to go to court but they told us that there was no way he would be found not guilty, the evidence was too strong for him to plead not guilty. A week before the trial the newspapers got hold of the story, at the same time my father had also been found guilty for not only murder but for the drugs as well. After that my whole life changed, everyone ignored me, my best friends, Charlotte and Laura left me for weeks, then after the Christmas break my life was officially ruined, they had transformed into monsters, dressed in clothes that barely covered their bodies, they started to use the power that popularity gave them to verbally and emotionally bully me." I shuddered at the memories and I felt something wet slip down my cheeks, tears. I was crying. Oh God why do I keep crying in front of them. 

"you don't have to carry on if it's too painful." Liam said, he's so kind like Niall. I have to say all the boys are incredibly nice and easy to get on with! 

"No, it's ok. I need to tell you," I spoke as clearly as I could but my voice kept breaking.

"Anyway, on my 14th birthday, a year after my father got arrested, my mother started to abuse me, verbally, emotionally and physically, all because of what day it was. My birthdays were never the same after this, in fact everyday was never the same, I'd hear abuse at school and then come home to hear it there even have pain inflicted on me by my own mother, it was hell. I still have the scars, even though the physical ones will heal the mental scars will never leave me. I got called so many names, I knew most of them weren't true but they still hurt, I decided I could do something about my weight, so I stopped eating completely, my mum didn't care if I got food or not so it was easy. I became anorexic, that's why I collapsed on your first day, well that and stress. After a while my whole family started to fall apart, my aunties and uncles started to disappear, there were more arguments than ever, more abuse thrown out. It's like when I love someone they seem to leave me, leaving a big,gaping whole in the middle of my heart. We all used to be so close. It's almost as if my love is l poisonous and everybody stays away from me. I haven't seen my cousins for two years, this is getting out of hand, I was put in hospital millions of times due to stress, it got so bad they had to give me medication. This resulted in me getting called druggie and told I was going  the same direction as my father this went on for years, it still is. In the recent weeks Charlotte and Laura has started 'recruiting' the boys to beat me up, they are usually ones who are the most violent, it all got to much for me to handle and I started cutting, by doing this I broke the promise to myself to never start, but I needed to release all the hurt and pain that there was." I took a deep breath for the next part, because this could ruin everything I had with these boys.

 "A few days ago, I made a suicide attempt, because of all of this, I had had enough of everything I believed there was no point in my existence anymore, no need for me to be here anymore, I didn't want this life. If it wasn't for Niall I would be dead now, he saved me, all of you did, I'm so grateful that I met you guys. I understand if you don't want anymore to do with me but I had no idea what my father was really like and I hope you understand that I'm not like him at all. Please don't judge and leave me like everyone else."I was now choking on my sobs so much I could hardly breathe, it was silent for a long time as the boys were taking in what I had told them, I was scared and nervous to know what they were thinking and if they wanted anything to do with me. I know Niall has stuck with me but will his band mates.

Finally the silence was broken by Harry, "We will not leave you because of something that you had no part of, none of this is your fault, it's just a shame that the world is full of judgemental  people. As for bullies, I don't know how they can call people ugly and whores when they need to find a mirror to look in that won't crack because they are the ugly ones. Cutting isn't a sign of weakness it is a sign of pain and it also shows how strong you were. We are lucky that Niall saved you on that day, we care about you, we don't judge you, we won't leave you until you want us to and even then we will always be there when you call. People do care about you, you don't need to be strong anymore because we will be strong for you. As for your family we can't fix that but I'm sure if you give them time and everything will get back to normal and I'm sure deep down they love and care for you very much too, they just don't know how to express it at this present moment. Don't give up on us yet, love because we won't give up on you" 

I sat there with tears of happiness and relief poring down my face, as I was pulled into a group hug, I knew I would have to tell Zayn and Louis but it may be slightly easier because I have more support behind me.

This may be my chance at a better and happier life! 


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