These Bruises

"Que sera, you'll never guess who I saw."
I was loved. I was hurt. That was repeated when I left you. But there are two other people who I love. As a single mom with two little kids in California, my life got better. It was six years. Six years since I last saw you. Six years since those little talks. Now you can see that these bruises that I've been hiding for those six long years mean. (Second book in Little Talks duology)


25. Meanings

~Britta POV

I stare into my old mirror, looking at myself. I'm wearing my dress that I wore the night of the employee talent show on the cruise, before I changed into my Taylor Swift inspired outfit. The ends of my hair were in tight curls and my red keds were slipped onto my feet.

A ton of memories came back. And they weren't the bad ones this time. They were actually the ones I would allow back into my mind. As I look into the mirror, I don't feel 24 anymore in the dress.

I feel 18.

The 18 year old Britta Carter.

The 18 year old Britta Carter with red ombré.

The 18 year old Britta Carter with red ombré and just lost her virginity...

Okay you get my point I feel young. End of story.

My phone goes off and "Carry On My Wayward Son" by Kansas plays. It's signifying that Molly is calling. I pick up my phone and hit answer. "Hello?"

"Is my ringtone still 'Carry On My Wayward Son'?" She asks.

I roll my eyes and giggle a little, "Yes it is."

"Okay, cool. Can I just tell you something that Mark just gave me!?" Damn, she sounds excited.

"What is it?"

"Mark got me...guess what it is?!"

I just take a random guess out of the blue and go with "an autograph from Zayn Malik of One Direction?" and end with laughing.

She wasn't laughing on the other end. "Holy fuck, are you serious?!"

"I'm dead serious! Mark was at my apartment holding a piece of paper and it was signed! He said that Zayn was in his cab one day to Underville and they had a chat and he knows my name! Don't you know how big of a fan I was back then?! I thought Mark was pulling some shit on me!"

I start laughing at her story. And of course, that's when Zayn is standing in my doorway. "Hold on, Molly." I walk to Zayn and give him my phone. He looks at me like I'm crazy and puts the phone to his ear.


That's when Molly starts fangirling. I've never heard Molly fangirl during the two years I've known her.

Zayn slowly hands me my phone back, and I just hang up on Molly. "I'll call her later."

"Who the hell was that?" He asks.

"Molly Parker. You met her brother, Mark?"

It takes him a few seconds to realize. "Oh, yeah! She"

I chuckle. "This is the first time I heard her be that excited!"

We had a fun chuckle fest, which then turned into a tickle fest for no freaking reason and we ended up on my floor tickling and laughing like my kids who are probably playing with their grandparents. I'm still wondering what my mom thought about being a grandmother at only forty.

And then funny thing happened:

Zayn and I became one of those scenes in a romantic movie where the couple is having fun and then they make out suddenly.

I was lying on the floor and he was on top of me. I swear I almost peed myself when he finally stopped and we were breathing heavily. He then just jerked down towards me and moved his lips over mine.

It was sweet and passionate and technically everything I'd expect when me and Zayn kissed when we were a couple. I missed those days. We would hold hands on the sky deck, those small kisses that we would give and receive, everything was good.

But after the cruise, my life went from hell to Heaven, and then surprise I'm back in hell. But with Zayn back now, two years after the Charlie incident, I feel like Heaven is slowly coming back.

We continued to kiss and he was almost going to the zipper on my dress when I stopped him. "Not now, we have a dinner to go to." I remind him.

His eyes widen in realization. "Riiiiggghhhtt." He exaggerates. He gets off of me and straightens out his shirt as I straighten my dress. Hair falls over my face, but he pushes it behind my ear. "Pick up where we left off when we get home?" He says.

He's married, and expecting.

This right now is an affair going on.

A pretty big one.

Once a big time pop star married to another pop star seeing a commoner.

Should I say no?

If I don't, Perrie could get suspicious and stuff.

"I don't think that's a good idea." I finally answer.

But I end with a wink.

Meaning yes.

[this is a filler chapter. Not much going on until a few chapters later where all hell breaks loose!

I did amazing on midterms! I got A on Language Arts, A in French, A in Honors Geometry, A- in Honors World History, B in Honors Science, and an A in Symphonic Band! Now I got scheduling tomorrow. I'm probably going to sign up for apush (AP US History) and Honors Biology. I may do Honors Algebra 2 or something. I'm not sure what the next class is for language arts at my school, and I may do French 2 Honors. I'm talking about my sophomore year and I'm halfway through being a freshman. Why?

Songs for this chapter are:

Carry On My Wayward Son-Kansas (and no I don't watch Supernatural)

Crush-David Archuleta

I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Big things are going to happen. And by big I mean BIG!


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