Careless -Complete-

You were my best friend. We did everything together. You were my first laugh, my first trouble, my first time. Then you left when I needed you most. So Liam, please tell me why you're back. I want us to be the same but how can that be? We can't because back then we were careless...and I'm a mother now.
Warning: Mature scenes and language.

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9. Confused

“Baby, what are you doing?” I giggle. “I’m trying to bread you hair!” I laughed and brought him so he was in front of me. “Its braid” I smiled. “And no, you’re not braiding it. Last time you tried, you knotted it!” He fake pouted and stuck out his tongue.

The sun was setting on the beach and we all decided to light up a bonfire and stay for another hour or two.  We brought out marshmallows and skewed them so they could roast. I was having a fun time. Despite how Liam and Sophia were sitting right across from me in our little circle. I tried to ignore them and focus my attention on something else. Like Harry and Zayn who were sitting either side of me or my son playing with my hair.

“You’d love her” Zayn said. I had come to know that Zayn had a significant other. Well, fiancé if I should say. Her name’s Perrie and by the sounds of it, she’s a great girl. “Would I ever be able to meet her?” I asked while dusting sand out of my son’s hair. If I’m going to be around these guys I’m gonna at least need a girl around.

When Li and I were younger, it was always just the two of us. No girl or problems. When he left, I didn’t make many friends after that. The only girl my age I actually talk to is the hostess from work. I don’t even call her by her real name! I don’t even know it! Oh wait, it’s Marta…never mind.

He smiled at my request, “We’ve got about another week here so I guess I can make arrangements for her to be here.”

My smile dropped. Another week? What the hell? Why would he do this? Come back when he damn well knows he’s leaving again.

I plastered a smile. “That’d be great.”

Now was definitely a reason to be depressed. I was planning to tell Liam about Jamie but I need more time. A week definitely isn’t enough.

“You look sad again” Jamie whispered. I sighed, “I’m fine” I said with a small smile. “Now give me kisses and whiskes.” (Kisses and whiskers).

He came close to me and gave me a kiss on the nose before rubbing it against mine. I did the same. We both softly laughed and he wrapped his little arms around my neck, hugging me. I looked to the side and caught Harry staring at us adoringly. He tinges and looks away.

The light from the flame illuminates his face and makes his eyes a different shade of green.

So beautiful.

***

“You sure you can do this?” I ask Liam as he steps through the door of my flat. Tonight was Harry and I’s date. Liam offered to watch Jamie for me while I was out. Sort of like a ‘sorry’ about what happened at the beach. “Yeah, it’s not like I’ve let a child die before” he jokes but I have no smile on my face.

“Li, this is serious. We’re talking about my son here.”

I see a shadow flash over his eyes but don’t think of it.

“Just messing with you. Anything you want to go over before you have to go?”

“I’ll tell you in a little while; I have to finish getting ready. Jamie!” I call throughout the flat. “Coming!” he yelled and I heard his little pitter patter sound on the carpet floor.

“Liam’s here!” “Already?! I haven’t even set up all my toys” he says and finally emerges from his room. I hear Liam lightly chuckle.

“Need a drink? Tea?” I ask him. “That’d be great.” “You still like it with honey and a splash of milk?” He nods while smiling fondly at my realization. “Alright, I’ll be back” I say and exit to the kitchen.

It took me about ten minutes to make two mug fulls of tea. I walked to the living room where I heard Liam and Jamie play. I stopped at the entrance and watched them. They seemed to not have noticed me, as they were having a good time.

They both were on the floor with Jamie’s toys and that same effing hulk toy I stepped on the other day. I never thought I’d see this day. The day Liam was sitting on the floor playing with our son and enjoying himself. I know Jamie really likes him. He should, they act just alike.

I felt as if I’d start to tear up so I shook my head of my thoughts and brought the tea to Liam. “Thanks” he smiled and set it on the coffee table.

I went to the bathroom to get ready. I showered, straightened my hair and put on a decent outfit. The outfit consist of army green skinny jeans, white button up, and brown sandals. I braided a front piece of my hair and clipped it to the side. I applied some light makeup and tinted lip gloss because I'm mental when it comes to putting it on so light is right.

I stepped out of the bathroom and went to the living room to check up on Liam and Jamie. "How do I look?" I asked, straightening my shirt. "Pretty" Jamie chirps. Liam warmly smiles, "You look lovely." I feel heat rise on my cheeks. "Thanks" I smile.

"Anything you want me to know?" he asks. "Oh right! Well, he's two so he can't do much but watch tv and play with his toys. If he's hungry there's left overs in the fridge. AND if he wants a snack read the label because he's allergic to soy. AL-LER-GIC. I can't stretch that enough." He nods. Just then the bell rings. I leave them to play and go to open the door.

Harry's there with a white top and dark jeans, brown boots that he seems to wear very often and a cheeky smile on his face. "Hi" I whisper, suddenly feeling shy by his presence. "Hi" he says back, sounding just as me. "Hello!" Jamie appears next to me. Harry and I break our trance and snap our heads to the little guy stood by me. "Hey Jamie" Harry says, kneeling down a bit to get closer to his height. "Let's cut the chat, Styles" he says and both Harry and my eyes widen. "Have her home by ten or...or...um" he puts his finger to his chin and turns back into the house, "what was it after that?" he asks. I hear Li 'whisper' something. "Liam!" I exclaim, taking one of Jamie's toys on the floor and chucking it at him.

He laughed as he dodged the stuffed toy. I kneel down to Jamie, "Say you're sorry" I whisper to him with a stern look on my face. He turns to Harry who has an amused expression on his face. "Sorry....Liam made me!" Harry laughs, "It's alright. I'll be sure to have her here by ten" he jokes.

I kiss Jamie on the cheek and say bye, closing the door behind me and then facing Harry. "Sorry about him" I giggle. "No, no he's fine. Just watching over his mum." "He's two" I say with a joking expression. "Liam might corrupt him" he laughs, "the way of Payne."

Trust me, he's got it down pack.

Liam's POV:

Only thirty minutes after Ed left Jamie said he was tired. I put him to bed with a 'sippy cup' full of water and my ipod on reply of 'Look after you'. I used to sing it to Ed and I guess it really worked because Jamie fell asleep in no time.

I went back to the living room and was on my phone when I saw the tapes. I didn't mean to snoop or anything, I was just curious. I went to the stack and looked through them.

'My message to you 11/18/10'

'Those sick days 6/12/10'

'My belly 8/22/10'

I decided to watch 'Those sick days' because it was closer to the date that I left.

I played the tape and sat on the couch to watch it.

"Hey Eden." I heard her dads voice again from behind the camera. She was in bed and had the covers pulled over her head. "Go away." "No, you have school today." "I'm not going." Her dad, Isaac, sighed, "Look, you haven't since last week. It's Monday, a new week, let's go."

"I don't like school anymore!" she screamed through the covers. Her dad rubbed her back over the blanket. "I know you're upset about Liam but this can't interfere with your school life." "Shut up dad." "You're so moody these days."

She abruptly shot out of the covers and ran away. Her dad cautiously walked to the bathroom where she had hid out. He opened the door and the camera showed Ed sitting against the wall super pale, wiping her mouth. She began to cry, "I'm not going to school."

Her dad set the camera down on the counter, angling it so it was on Eden. He walked to her, kneeled down and hugged her. She cried into his chest, "What's wrong with me?" "Shh, nothing's wrong love."

He stood up with his daughter in his arms and walked towards the camera. It cut off.

I instantly felt sad. I wish I could've been there for her.

The camera turned back on and it was Ed sitting up on her bed. It didn't even look like her. More like a ghost representation of my best friend. It replaced her with a lifeless form.

"So I'm home again" she spoke.

"I feel like crap and I don't even know how I'm gonna tell my parents." She shamefully shook her head with and ironic smile. "I'm pregnant. Pregnant!" she exclaimed. "I'm sure my dad's going to watch this and flip. I'm more scared of my moms reaction. Ugh, I'm screwed."

I wanted to cry for her...I did. Her eyes teared.

"I wonder what Liam would think" she mumbled with her head hung low.

What would I think?

"I mean, it's been two months since he left and I still cry like it happened yesterday."

Two months?! She was pregnant only two month after I left. By who?! She never really liked any guys from our school. She was always with me. I don't get it.

Eden's POV:

"...or act like you didn't see it." Harry joked. I laughed. He was telling me about the fans as we walked along the quiet park. It was dark and no signs of paparazzi. We already ate and decided to walk a bit before heading back to my place. "That's so awkward" I giggled. We were currently on the subject about how fans write fictional stories about the boys. "I know, sometimes they're Larry Stylinson ones." I gave him a confused look. "Me and Louis" he hinted. It took me a good five seconds to realize. "Ohhh...ew." He laughed.

We were having a good time but something has been eating away at me. I wanted to ask but what if his answer left me broken. I did like Harry. He showed me a great time without judging me because of my kid. "So...um" I started. "you guys are leaving?" I asked. His smile slightly dropped and his hand that was entwined with mine, tensed. His smile was now sad and remorseful. "Uh, yeah in a few days."

I shook my head. "Why would you take me out if you knew you were leaving?" I whispered, ashamed of myself for not knowing any sooner. "Honestly, I would've regretted not asking you if I had the chance. You seem like a great girl and I wanted to get to know you better."

I forced a smile, "It just sucks to know that you'll be leaving soon."

And Liam...again.

"I had a great time tonight...thank you" I smiled. We were stood in front of my door, saying our goodbye's for the night. "No, thank you. I'm glad you let me take you out. We should get together again before I leave" he half smiled. I nodded, "Definitely."

He wrapped his arms around me in a hug. I did the same, placing my arms around his shoulders. His smell was heavenly and his warmth left me vulnerable, as I was accustomed to coldness for so long. He gently caressed my back with his rather large hand, touching me as if no one has before. It's been forever.

We slowly pull apart with our arms still around the other. I saw his eyes flicker from mine to my lips and I found myself shortly doing the same. I felt his palm rest against my cheek as we both leaned in.

I shouldn't do this. Knowing that he's leaving should stop me before I get emotionally attached. It's too late. I already am. I do like Harry. He's very sweet but inappropriate when he wants to be.

Why do I feel this way in such a short period of time?

Because you haven't had a guy this close to you since Liam my conscience tells me.

Subtly his lips are on mine and the feeling is so alien. I lightly fist the fabric of his shirt that lays over his shoulders. I feel his hands lie on the small of my back, bringing me closer as if I'd run before the sensation ceased. I felt it in his kiss too. The confusion felt in our heated state. It was so...different. A good different.

All too soon the kiss ends with the opening of a door. My door.

We both turn our heads and there's Liam with wide eyes. "Sorry...I just heard something and...never mind" he stammered and closed the door.

I laughed as I turned back to Harry, glad to see that he was doing the same. "We're surely doing that again" he smirked. "How about now?" I whispered with a smile playing on my lips. He raised and eyebrow but none the less, leaned down and kissed my once again.

I stepped into my flat with red cheeks. Oh why did Liam have to intrude? Now it's gonna be awkward.

I step into the living room and see him watching my tapes. The hell?

"What are you doing?" I snap. "Watching TV" he replies with no emotion. "Watching TV" I mimic. "Why are you watching my stuff?" I pace to the telly and pop out the VHS.

My eyes widen at the stack of watched VHS'. "How many did you watch?" I squeak.

"Enough." "What?" "Nothing. I'm gonna go. Jamie's in there sleep" he says pointing to his room.

This isn't Liam!

He's being so indifferent.

"Who are you?" I whisper, looking directly into his eyes. "Who am I? Who are you? You've changed!" he yelled. "I'm a mother and YOU left!" I can get so much louder. "You keep getting upset over me leaving! Get over it! OK I left so what?"

If only he knew how much I needed him. How much Jamie needs him.

"You don't know the half of it" I hissed. "I don't care to know."

I want to cry so hard. I want to kick, slap, scream and kiss him all at the same time. Damn you Liam!

"Get out."

He freezes, "Wha?"

"Get. Out." A few tears fall from my face. "Leave! Damn it Liam! Get the hell out!" I grab his wrist and open the door, shoving him out. He turned back to me, shocked.

"Ed...I."

"You think I wanted a kid at seventeen? And be judged by the only person I had left?"

He gave me a confused look.

"You, Liam...you. I have no one else! Yet, here you are giving me a look that says 'you whore' and 'how could you'. Like I haven't seen it before" I sarcastically said. "I love Jamie to death but I'd take it back just to not do what I did on that one stupid night."

"Eden..."

"I...I don't want to see you again" I whispered.

"Please..."

"Leave."

I closed the door and locked it with tears streaming down my face. I walk to my room and remove my make up. I change into my pajamas and check on Jamie. He's up, trying to read a book. I smile. He can't read but he tries to understand the pictures.

"Hey baby." He looks up and beams. "Mommy!" he exclaims and jumps off the bed and into my arms. I've never been away from him for this long. He's always by my side. "I missed you" I said and left kisses all over his face. "Me too!"

I laid with him in his bed and began to read him the book. My phone vibrated.

Harry: That kiss was...amazing. Hopefully we can do it again. Goodnight Eden xx

I smiled and set it back down. I looked down and saw that Jamie was asleep. I grabbed Clark, the stuffed bear that Liam got me so long ago, and placed it next to him. I stepped out of the bed and walked to the living room where I found myself watching all the tapes for the millionth time and crying like it all happened yesterday.

A/n: What did Liam watch?!?! Suggestions?

-Mone'

 

 

 

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