The Very Thought of You

Isolde Algieri, is an Irish-Italian girl from a wealthy family, who has been unlucky in the love department. She's A-list actress who is trying to move on with her life, after going through a painful divorce from another actor Mark Cornwell. Tristan Cavanaugh, a rock n roll princess who is the lead singer of a rock band that is taking over the world, her life is filled with sex, women, and drugs. Tristan has done everything in her power to forget about Isolde, the only girl she's truly ever loved. But when Mark keeps re-entering Isolde's life she begins having thoughts about taking him back, just so she doesn't have to be lonely. That plan quickly goes out the window, when Tristan reappears back in her life. So when Tristan appears on Isolde's doorstep, sparks begin to fly between the former lovers. Soon they begin a passionate relationship that will change their lives forever.

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1. The Loss of Love

Love is the irresistible desire to be desired irresistibly. --Robert Frost

 

A rainy night in New York City, 2014

Isolde Algieri was staring out of her loft window, trying to figure out why she was always getting hurt in her relationship. Whenever she was in a bad mood, her mind would always take her back to Mark, which she didn't really like. She could also say that whenever she was in a good mood, she thought Tristan, her angel. Before she should try to get in touch with her. OMG,I can't believe I'm thinking about jumping her bones, I only been divorced three months I must be really horny,she thought. She couldn't help but to reflect on her life with her actor ex-husband Mark Cornwell, who she met on a movie set. The first time she saw him, there was an instant attaction between them, that Mark proposed to her, after only knowing her for 30 minutes. That made her like him even more. He was very handsome and charmismatic, that Isolde couldn't resist him any longer. Before she knew it, she and Mark became lovers. In the beginning their relationship was very hot, that their couldn't keep their hands off each other. I'm such a failure, I couldn't even make my marriage work, maybe I should give up, love has hasn't worked out for me.Isolde said aloud to herself. Maybe something was wrong with her, she thought to herself. Maybe she wasn't cut out for lifelong romance.

She walked walked over to her couch and took a seat. Isolde could'nt believe that she was divorced, it only seem like yesterday, that she and Mark were discussing having kids, and now she's a divorced woman, who doesn't know where her life is going. Mark's betrayal was very painful for her, finding him in bed with one of his many mistresses, had hurt her so much, that she lost faith in love. What really hurt her the most, was that Mark had been having affairs the entire time that they were married. It was if their whole marriage was a lie. Mark begged for forgiveness, but Isolde decided she could'nt trust him anymore, the pain he caused was to great. The only time she could do was to file for divorce, a divorce that the great Mark Cornwell did not want. He wanted to save the marriage, he believed that they could get pass his many infidelities. She knew she couldn't forget the pain he had caused her. Isolde knew deep inside her, that she couldn't go back to him, even though she still loved him and that made her mad as hell. That asshole didn't deserve her love.

But Isolde was through with Mark and the shit that came with him, she decided she didn't want to stay with a man that could do that to her. She wanted someone who would value, love, and be faithful to her. That life is behind her, even though Mark is still trying to get her back. Isolde couldn't help but smile to herself, it's funny how life doesn't also go the way you planned. All this thinking about the lost of love, has her thinking about her first love, the charming and sexy Tristan Cavanaugh, the girl who broke her heart. The only woman that Isolde never forget, even when she was married to Mark, thoughts and dreams of Tristan never left her. She often thought she was betraying Mark, by thinking about her ex-lover. Their relationship was very epic, their lovemaking was out of this world. They would always finish each other sentences. During that time, her relationship with Tristan was one of the happiest moments in her life. She loved just being around Tristan, I was no one existed except them. She could talk to Tristan for hours and never get bored. She couldn't do that with Mark, he was always preoccupied with other things (mainly his mistresses). Tristan was always there for her, whenever she needed her. Even after all this time her feelings for Tristan never faded. Some things never change. 

The knock at the door took Isolde by surprise, she wasn't expecting anyone at this time at night. She walked over to the door and opened it slowly, revealing her ex-husband standing there with his puppy eyed face.

"Mark what are you doing here. I thought I told you I never wanted to see you again. I have nothing to say to you."

"Please Isolde can I come in, I really need to talk to you."

"Fine Mark, but make it quick." Isolde motions Mark to come into the loft. Mark walks over to the couch and takes a seat. Isolde walks over to her lazy boy chair and took a sit.

"Mark, why are you here? Our divorce has been final for three months now, so I don't know what you could possibly want to talk about. I honestly believe there is nothing between us, and it will never be."

"I'm here Isolde because I miss you like crazy. I know I fucked up, but if you give me another chance, I promise I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you." I know I hurt you, I'm truly sorry. I have no excuse for what I did, what I did to you and our marriage. I didn't value what we had together, and I will regret that for the rest of my life."

Isolde could feel the anger in her bottom up to the surface. Mark had the nerve to come over here and ask forgiveness. That made her angry beyond belief. How dare he do this to her, she was doing fine before he showed up tonight. Isolde couldn't help but stare into eyes, those beautiful eyes that once made her heart melt. Out of nowhere, Isolde could feel her barriers coming down, before she knew, tears were running down her face. Mark reacted quickly to the tears running down her face. Before she knew it, Mark pulled her into his arms.

"I'm so sorry baby I didn't mean to make you cry." Mark begin showering her with kisses all over her face. She could feel her pulse race. Isolde was lost for words. She couldn't that this man still had power to affect her like this. She pushed out of his arms. She didn't want to be held by him, she didn't need him, not now or ever.

"Please don't cry Izzie, please don't cry."

"Mark I want you to leave right now. You have no right to come here and ask for another chance.I hate you so much right now. Why don't you go to one of your whores. Maybe one of them can help you with your missing me problem. Cause I sure as hell don't want you in my bed anymore. You know what, I never loved you. I was only in lust with you. The only person I love in this world is Tristan. Everytime we had sex, I thought of you (which was mostly true). So in retrospect you did me a favor, it gave me an excuse to get out of the marriage. I can't even stand to look at you right now."

"You really don't mean that. I refuse to believe that our marriage was some big lie." Mark said with pain in his voice. He could just pretend that he didn't hear her declaration, that she only said that to hurt him which she had succeeded in doing. 

"You really have some nerve Mark acting like some innocent party, you were the one that was sleeping with anything with a fucking vagina. I'm so glad that we never had any children, because I would hate having you in my life forever." 

"You really do mean that, don't you." Mark asked.

Isolde shook her head to answer Mark's question. She could feel a powerful strength come over her, no more was she going to bite her tongue anymore. All that that pint up anger was making its presence known. Mark flinched as if she had hit him. She could see tears form in his eyes, she had struck a nerve. She had hurt his feelings, like he had hurt her. Mark began walking towards her, she quickly motioned him with her hands to stop. But he kept coming. She needed him to go right now. She didn't want to fall apart in front of him. She didn't want show her weakness, she wouldn't give him the pleasure.

"I deserved that. The only thing I can't say is I'm very sorry. I just wanted to tell you, that I still love you, and I always will. Okay, I'll leave, but I can call you sometimes. I would really like for us to start over as friends and maybe we work our way up to being together again."

Isolde didn't know what guess to say. Mark just didn't get it, and she knew he never would. She knew she had to say anything he wanted to hear so he would leave.

"Sure, but I can't promise you anything. It might take me a while to let my guard down."

"I understand." Mark mumured, almost in the low whisper, that she almost couldn't hear him. It pained him to see the hurt in Isolde's eyes. He knew that he was the cause of that hurt and pain.

Mark walked over to her and have a gentle hug that still affected her. He gave a kiss on her forehead. She walked him over to the door and let him out. She let out a sigh of relief as she closed the door. Isolde was again alone, going through emotions that Mark had triggered in her. She hated that he still had power over her, but she knew she couldn't cave. She wasn't going to let him hurt her again. Isolde walked over to light switch to dim the lights. She made her way to her bedroom. She lifted the bed cover and slid under the covers. Before long she drifted off to dreamland, where she could run the safe arms of her beloved Tristan.

*****

The rain continued to pour heavily down on the residents of New York City. The rainy night reminded Tristan of her favorite graphic and steampunk novels. The streets were crowded with people coming and going. As the night covered NYC, and as strangers passed her by, Tristan was reminded of a happliy time, where she and Isolde walk the streets of New York hand in hand. They would visit all their favorite places, and then head back to Tristan's parents penthouse for some afternoon delight. Tristan couldn't help but some smile at the way they would tear off each others like wild animals. They just couldn't get enough of one another. Tristan was so nervous that her hands were shaking so bad. She didn't know what reaction she was going to get when she finally saw Isolde for the first time in several years. How would Isolde react to seeing her. The last time they were together, Tristan had broken up with Isolde, because she felt they were heading down different paths. It was better that she ended then, because it would hurt so much later. As she continued to make her way to Isolde's apartment, Tristan had an intense feeling that her life was going to change. The feeling made Tristan walk even faster until she made it Isolde's apartment complex. She hurried into the building and took the stairs to the eight floor, her heart was beating so fast, that it felt like it might burst. She finally reached Isolde's apartment. She was so out of breath, because of the running she had done, that she had to sit down for a minute. The moment of truth had finally arrived. She knocked on the door two times. Tristan hear a voice in the apartment. Before she could knock for a fourth time, Isolde opened the door, was shocked and amazed to find Tristan, who was wearing a KISS t-shirt and grey skinny jeans standing outside her door. There was definitely some magic in the air on this rainy night. Isolde was quite certain of that. But she never imagine seeing her first love standing at her front door.

She thought it was Mark coming back to plead his case again. She could deal with that, but not seeing Tristan, who could be a figure of her wild imagination. The she would ask herself, why she was thinking of Tristan right now. Was she that desperate in finding someone, rather than being alone.

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