worthless but lovable

* i am re writing it so sorry if chapters are missing*

jess feels lonely she never had a boyfriend or never even kissed with somebody but that was all about to change on the night she decided to end it all... a boy comes a long it isn't just a boy its the towns bad boy she is afraid to fall and to be broken..... but isn't she broken enough? so why not have fun... (a justin bieber fanfic)

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5. punishment

chapter 4

 

jess’s point of view

when i woke up i fell this horrible pain in my wrist but i decided to ignore it. I turned arouns and saw that justin was still fast asleep. He looked kinda cute like this.. Wait i can not think such things. I am not allowed to fall in love. Not as if he would ever love me back. Everyone was just pretending to care about me. i got out of the warm bed. What am i going to do? Maybe i could make breakfast. Ughh i could aslo try to escape but i do not know my way around here. My mood swings are really annoying at one moment i want to kill myself and a few minutes later i’m fine again. i walked down the stairs and into the kitchen.

As i looked around i saw the gun justin had left on the table. What if i just..? i could still end it. I sat down at the table. Maybe i could find my pills before he woke up. I started looking in a few of the cabinets. After a good ten minutes i decided to give up. When is sat back down the gun was still laying in front of me. well this might be my only option.

Justin’s point of view

I woke up looking next to me and the beautifull brunette that fell a sleep next to me was gone. I turned around thinking she probably went to the bathroom. Wait.. what if she had another plan. I jumped out of bed and ran down stairs. When i reached the kitchen i saw he sitting at the table with the gun placed against her head. NOOO seriously why is she doing this? Think justin… “what are you doing?” well you can see what she is doing you smart ass. Sometimes i could be really dumb. “i am ending it” her voice sounded shaky and a little tear ran over her cheek. Ugh i was beginning to feel angry with her. “no you are fucking not, give me the gun.” I walked towards her and harsly took the gun from her. “you are not trying this again.” i promised to punish her if she did something stupid. Well she deserves it. “you are in big trouble” she looked at me with angry eyes. “and what are you fucking going to do to me?” is she not afraid of me? “i’ll show you” i walked towards her and grabbed both her arms pulling her up stairs with me. “get on the bed, you are never going to do something like that again!!”  

jess’s point of view 

i sat down afraid of what would happen. He came closer smashing me down on the bed. Oh no. “please don’t do this. I promise i will never try to do something like that ever again.” he stopped for a moment, my shirt already removed from my body. After what felt like 10  minutes wich was acctually only a minute. He started to remover more clothing. “well go ahead rape me. i am not fucking sorry. You do not know what it feels like to hate yourself so much that you want to die. You do knot know how it feels to hurt yourself on the outside to kill the pain on the inside. So go ahead and make my life more miserable.” 

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