The Mermaid Project

Hi my name is Kai.
I am 16 years old.
I was selected for the mermaid project.
It sounded exciting at first, but now...I don't know who I am.

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15. Tears

 I started to think about my parents and what they would think of me if they knew. What they would say if they saw this. I kept telling myself it was right but deep inside I knew it was wrong. I knew this had to stop. Tears filled my eyes. I was so confused. I wanted him so badly, but this was not the way. 
"No." I mummbled. My voice was week. If he heard me, he had ignored it. 
"No! Stop!" I screamed. He stopped and looked at me.
"What's wrong?" He looked at me. His mesmerizing look, his beautiful eyes. 
"Stop." I cried. I tried pushing him off of me but he was too heavy. He moved away so that I could get off. 
"This is wrong." I said while turning away from his gaze. I stepped off the bed.
"But Kai--"
"No!" I cut him off. I didn't want to hear his sweet talk, his sweet words.
"What we just did..." I was reduced to tears just thinking about it. I had loved it, but I could never have it. Not with him.
"What we just did was illegal!" I screamed at him.
"You of all people should know that!" I added. He worked for the govornment, yet he had just commited a federal crime. 
"This...can't ever happen." My eyes were weary from tears. How was I the wiser one in the sittuation? Shouldn't he have known better?
"Kai, I love you!" He screamed as I neered the door. I liked him. A lot. But I had realised that it wasn't love. If it was, I had blocked it out. I knew better. If he really loved me, he wouldn't have dome this! I thought of Jake. He would never have done this to me. If Jake was 20 he wouldn't have kissed me. I knew who I belonged with.
"Anything we had. It's gone. Just forget about me!" I screamed back. It was what was best. I grabbed my dress and covered my front with it. 
"Goodbye Dr. Sidonikov." I said as I stepped out of the room.

I quickly ran to the elivator. My eyes blurred with tears. I pressed the button about 20 times before it finally opened. I ran in and fell to my knees. My tears had drenched my face and chest. 
"Ohmygosh!" I heard a familiar voice say.
"Kai, are you ok." It was deep and kind. Deep and caring. 
"Jake." I whispered. He crouched down next to me and heald my dress. 
"Here." He said, handing it to me while facing away. He hadn't even tried to see me naked. He hadn't even flinched about it. He had a perfect chance and he didn't take advantage of it. He didn't take advantage of me. I slipped it on. I must have looked terrible. Tear stains covering my eyes and my ugly face when I was crying. I didn't want Jake to see me like this.

"I'm sorry Jake." I kept saying. I felt so bad. So guilty. What I did was wrong and I needed to apologize. I needed to let him know that I wanted him, not Jessie. That I was gullible stuborn amd stupid. I didn't deserve Jake to be there for me, but no matter what, he was there for me.

I kept facing away because I didn't want him to see my face. He put one hand on my shoulder. 
"Kai, it's ok. I'm here." He said quietly. I was once again reduced to tears and zi turned around and burried my face in his chest. Surly I was soking it, but he didn't seem to mind. He wrapped his arms around my back and started rubbing circles on my back. 
"I'm sorry." I whispered into his chest.
"I forgive you." He said. I was shocked. If he knew what I had done, he would be so kind. He would push me away. Tell me I was a slut. Thatwas what I deserved, not a loving embrace. 
He walked me to my room. I would let go of his shirt and I struggled to walk. I was tripping over my own feet and my eyes were tired from all the tears. Finaly, he opened the door to my room and lead me inside.

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