Loved You First

"Was it possible that all the signs, I had convinced myself were just my imagination, actually were real?

I just couldn't help but wonder how long she'd had feelings for him, even if they were subconcious.
I was sure that I loved her first, but at this point I actually didn't know who she loved first."

A few slightly sexual references (not smut, I don't do that)
A few slightly violent scenes
Use of strong language at times
SELF-HARM references in a couple of chapters


10. 'C'mon C'mon'

Chapter six

”C’mon C’mon”

At 11pm, we were all gathered in the suite, discussing where to go. Well actually the boys were discussing, while I just sat and checked them all out in the “going out” clothes, and they all looked very hot, but I couldn’t stop looking at Louis. He was wearing black pants, a white shirt, with red shoes and a red wristwatch, matching my outfit like he had said, and it was just so cute.

I was really happy to have a friend like Louis, always making my smile and laugh. Of course Zayn did to, but that was in a different way; Zayn made me smile because he was so sweet towards me and charming, whereas Louis was always so cute and funny with me.

I noticed Zayn looking back and forth between me and Louis, and I wondered if he was jealous of our semi-matching outfits. He had definitely acted jealous earlier, about me being in Lou’s room, and I found it weird, because Lou and I had become good friends, and it hadn’t been a problem before. Besides me and Zayn weren’t anything official yet. We had only been on one dinner ”date” that first week, and I didn’t think that he actually really like me in that way. Until today of course. I couldn’t help but feeling a little happy, that he had acted jealous earlier.

At 11.15, we had succeeded in getting out of the hotel, unnoticed we hoped, and were heading to this new place, I couldn’t even remember the name of. They said it was pretty exclusive, and only the famous, the rich or people with good contacts to get in, so it wasn’t a likely place to meet some crazy stalker. Unless, of course she was one of the above, but none of us wanted to think about that, we just wanted to have a fun night out. But with Liam that wasn’t totally possible.

On the way there, Liam told us that while in the club we should be at least two people at all times, and we would all meet at the bar at 3am to go home. Hardly anyone was listening to him though, as we were all too excited. Arriving at the club, it was no problem getting in, as they knew the doorman, and I even felt slightly bad just jumping the queue, but I wasn’t going to complain.

It took only ten minutes, for us all to get lost from each other, but at least I had stuck together with Liam, hoping the others had stayed together. We were sitting in a booth, in awkward silence. Of all the boys, I was least close to Liam, and I didn’t really know how to start a conversation over the loud music, so I just sat sipping my drink, while he played with his phone.

Ten minutes later, I finally saw Harry and Louis walking towards us, and I was relieved, until I noticed what Harry had on the tray in his hands. Shots.


Louis’ p.o.v.

Five minutes after entering the club, Harry and I headed straight to the bar, not even noticing where the others went. To be honest, I didn’t really want to leave Mag, but I didn’t want to see her dancing or something with Zayn.

Harry and I sat with our beers at the bar, and I noticed him looking at me weirdly, so I gave him a questioning look. He leaned in so I could hear him,

“Louis, I know.”

“You know what?” I asked slightly nervous.

“I know how you feel about Mag.”

What? How could he know, I had been good at hiding my true feelings. He could see the shock in my face, and continued,

“You really shouldn’t be so surprised. If you think about it, you’ll realize how I know about your feelings.”

First I didn’t know what he meant, but then it hit me. Of course! I should have thought of it earlier.

“But why are you telling me this Harry? I mean, why here and why now?”

He shrugged answering,

“I’m not sure, but I just want you to be careful Lou. I don’t want anyone getting hurt. And you know I don’t only mean you or Zayn.”

He looked me deep in the eyes, and I knew who he meant.

“But we’ll talk more later, or tomorrow. Now we party.” He said with a smirk, ordering a bunch of shots, while I searched for the others. I was happy, when we found Liam and Mag, and I grinned widely as we approached them.

Fifteen minutes, and five shots each later, Harry, Mag and I were laughing loudly at some stupid joke. We were definitely getting tipsy, and I remembered Mag mentioning that she was a light weight in the car. I couldn’t let her drink anymore, two drinks and five shots should be enough, and I had to protect her.

Like always when drinking, I got the urge to dance, to every upbeat song, so I instantly got up and took Mag’s hand. Friends could dance, it wouldn’t be bad.

“Lou, what are you doing?” Mag asked, pulling her hand back.

“What do you think silly, I want to dance with you, I love this song!” I didn’t even know what song was playing.

“No no no Lou, I really can’t dance!”

“That’s what all good dancers say!” I replied, rolling my eyes. She stayed put, so I looked her in the eyes, took her hands in mine, and started singing, just loud enough for her to hear, as I pulled her closer.

“C'mon c'mon

 Move a little closer now

 C'mon c'mon

Ain't no way you're walking out

C'mon c'mon

Show me what you're all about

Yeah I've been watching you all night

 There's something in your eyes

 Saying c'mon c'mon

And dance with me baby


The music is so loud

 I wanna be yours now

 So c'mon c'mon

 And dance with me baby”

Maggie had wide eyes, clearly shocked, so I took the opportunity, and without hesitation, I pulled her quickly to the dance floor, where she couldn’t escape surrounded by people. She just rolled her eyes, laughed at me and soon we were dancing together.

I don’t know how long we were dancing, what time it was, or where the others were but I didn’t care. We just kept on dancing to song after song. I was dancing with a girl I liked for the first time in years.

There was something different in her eyes, when she looked at me. At least that’s what I thought, but it could have been the alcohol deceiving me. I pulled her closer, looking in her sparkling eyes, and got lost in them. There was no one around, no lights, no music, no moving bodies, just her eyes looking in mine, making my heart race faster than a champion horse.

And then something wonderful happened. Like in a movie, everything moved in slow motion. Her moving closer, our fingers entwining and the second our lips met in the softest, but most passionate kiss, I’d ever experienced. I didn’t know who initiated the kiss, but it must have been me, because five seconds later Maggie pulled away, looking at me confusedly. Before I could stop her, she was lost in the crowd.

Those five seconds had felt like an eternity in my heart. Technically it wasn’t anything special, it was the type of kiss you might quickly give your friend, but I had felt this passion which made it different from a friendly kiss. Because of the feelings I had for her, it felt like so much more, and it could have been the alcohol deceiving my eyes, but the moment before the kiss, I was almost sure she had leant her face towards mine.


Maggie’s p.o.v.

I kissed him. He kissed me. I and Louis kissed. But it didn’t make any sense. Louis and I were just friends, I didn’t like in that way. Did I? NO! I liked Zayn, now I was finally sure. I had been in doubt about my feelings for him, but now I was sure, I was in love with Zayn, and there was no point in denying it anymore. It wasn’t just a boy band crush, I knew that now. I wasn’t in love with Zayn, member of One Direction. I was in love with Zayn Malik, one the sweetest, most caring, charming, romantic and sympathetic person I knew, and now I had to find him and tell him.

The club was a lot more packed now, then when we had got there, and I’m sure I saw a few celebrities, but I didn’t even care. I had to find Zayn. I hadn’t seen him, since we got here, and I actually missed him. I took my phone out of my clutch to check the time. 2AM. There was another hour until we were meeting at the bar, and I had to find him before that. I had come to the conclusion that Louis kissed me in the heat of the moment, and I didn’t want to dwell anymore on it. It meant nothing.

In my search for Zayn, I decided I would go to the booth, hope one of the boys were there, and ask them about Zayn’s whereabouts.

I was about ten meters from the booth, but with the sea of people in between, it might as well have been fifty. I could hardly see who was sitting there. I finally caught a glimpse of Liam, and he was talking to… Zayn! Perfect! I started making my way through the crowd, but halfway there, someone stepped in front of me. At first I tried to move past them, but whoever it was, was blocking my way. I was about to say something, but then I looked at the person in front of me.

She was shorter than me, but her very high heels made us equal. Her reddish brown hair looked flaming red when the spotlight hit it. Her eyes were piercing green, and would have been beautiful if it wasn’t for the fact, that they were crazy eyes.

I stood there facing this girl, hoping it wasn’t who I thought, but unable to move or speak. This girl was blocking my sight of the boys, and they wouldn’t be able to see me through the crowd. Then the girl finally spoke in a chilling voice,

“I know who you are. “ It was that type of voice that at first sounded normal, until you listened closer, and noticed this psycho tone in it.

“You’re the girl taking up all my Harry’s time. But in case you didn’t know he’s mine.”

I had to pull myself together,

“How did you…”

“Find you?” she smirked, “yeah, I know he’s been avoiding me, probably because of you, but I have my methods. You really think I’m gonna let a few guards and a guest list get between me and my boyfriend? Well honey, you’re wrong! Especially if you think I’m gonna let some little tourist bitch take him away from me!”

I felt rage building up in me, and stepped closer as I said,

“Well you know what? You’re crazy! I’m not after Harry, and even if I was, he’s not your boyfriend, he doesn’t even know you, you freaking psycho!”

I had hardly finished my sentence, before she answered,

“Yeah you’re right I am crazy! I’m a crazy bitch, which is why you should be smart enough to stay away from Harry and the boys! Harry and I are meant to be, and I don’t care what I have to do to make him remember that!”

She stepped up to my face and actually towered a little over me,

“But I definitely won’t let a little nobody get in my way!”

I was about to say something, but she looked at something behind me, and said cheerfully,

“Oh look, there’s my baby now.” I quickly turned around searching for Harry, but he wasn’t there. And when I turned around, neither was she. Shit! She got away!

I pushed eagerly through the crowd and finally got to the booth only to find Zayn, Niall and Liam, but no Harry. Zayn smiled at my arrival, but that quickly faded when he saw the look on my face.

“Babe, what’s wrong?” he asked worried.

“The stalker. She’s here.” Was all I managed to get out, but it was enough. They all stood up, scanning the room, asking where she was. I pulled myself together, explained what happened and how she got away.

“How are we gonna find her? There are plenty of red haired girls with glittering dresses and heels in here, and she might not even be here anymore!” Niall said, looking madly around the place.

“Forget her! “ Liam said sternly, “right now, we have to find Harry before she does!”


Zayn’s p.o.v.

We had split up in two pairs to find Harry, so I was walking alongside Mag, looking closely at every curly haired boy. I could tell that she was a bit shook up be being face to face with a psycho, and I wished I had stayed close to her all night.

I had rushed to the bathroom, when we got there, and after being in the bar with Niall, and dancing a little, it had been an hour before we found Liam and Harry in a booth, who told me Mas was out dancing with Louis. Louis again. I had become jealous instantly but remembered what Harry had said, and realized there was no problem with friends dancing.

Now I was very upset, because Louis hadn’t looked after her. We all knew we had to be careful these days, and if he was dancing with her, why had she been alone when she met the stalker?

Finally I saw Louis, and wanted to yell at him for not looking after her, but I stopped myself. Finding Harry was more important now.

“Lou, have you seen Harry?” I asked quickly, before we had even reached him, shouting over the music.

“Don’t worry! I was just with him, when Liam and Niall found us and explained everything. They’re at the toilets now. Are you alright?” He asked turning to Mag, and she just nodded, avoiding eye contact with him. I wondered why.

Five minutes later Harry, Liam and Niall joined us, and we decided to go outside and talk.

“What are we gonna do? How are we gonna find her in there?” I asked nodding towards the club.

“We’re not.” Harry said, and we all looked at him, shocked,

“Right now, we’re going back to the hotel. Tomorrow we’re gonna get that bitch. I know how, and I know who she is.”

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