Throw my blades away for you

Alexia(alex) is stunned by the turn of events that happen. Her dad has as a stroke, and a few months later her mom kills herself. She lives with her 20 year old sister Talia who is nver there when she needs her. Alex cuts her wrist, and suicide does disturb the thoughts in her head.Then when she meets a romantic caring boy who gives her a reason to live.
MY FIRST FANFIC NO JUDGING

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1. Can't take the pain

I dig the edge of the knife opening my right wrist, letting my red blood stain the bathroom's white ceramic.I wince and cringe my cinnamonn eyes. I do this whenver I think about my parents or my lonelyness to get the pain out of my chest and somewhere else. I need to take my mind off it I tell myself whenver i don't have the guts. " Alex? Alex where are you?" My sister Talia calls.

"Aex?" She opens the door and screams at the top of her lungs. Talia stares at my wrists in disbelief. "What happended??!!" she asked in a paniced voice. My sister never payed enough attention to me to notice my scarred forearms, so this question never came up. I can't tell her i have been doing this to myself or she might call 911 or something crazy like that. I mean why live when nowone cares about you? " I uh.. I was running with a knife.. and uh i fell so uh.. I came to wash it.." I lied. " Well, we have to go to the hospital or something," She says. The hospital? No way. I know I'll be fine I've done this a million times. "No Talia I'm fine, It dosen't even hurt,"

"No we're going your my responsibility and I want you to go and get stitches," Oh now she actually cares about me. " Great job, did you finnally realise that they weren't only your parents?" I ask. By now I've already gotten up and ready to storm away. "What are you talking about?" Talia asks pretending not to know what I'm talking about. "Oh don't act stupid, just saying your not the only one that misses them. I miss them too you know." I  avoid her deep brown

eyes and stare at the blood stain on the floor instead. I don't look but i know she's crying , and hear her sniffing. "Alex.. I just.. I don't know anymore.. I just miss them" She inbetween sniffs. Oh my God of course you miss her! I feel like saying but insttead i tell her: "Ok well.." Talia runs down the hall sobbing like crazy. Drama queen. I wipe the blood stain but it won't dissapear, I scrub and scrub but nothing. My arms suddendly feels sore. I turn to leave and slip on the wet tile. "Ow" I whisper to myself. I lie splattered on the floor. To lazy to get up. Eventually, I get up in pain but who cares anyway. I go to my bedroom passing Talia's room. I put my ear to door and listen. She's still sobbing. Does she know I exist? Do I have to stab myself to get her attention? I go in my room and lie down on my miniscule bed. I turn to check the time. 9:00. I wonder if I go running, just disapear, will she look for me. Will she even notice? I think and think about everything. Eventually, I fall asleep but wake up around 3:00 because of my usual nightmare.

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