In Your Shadow

Not only are Taylor and Louis twins, they're also best friends.
But with Louis getting even more perfect everyday, will Taylor manage to escape his shadow?
Or will she always be known as just 'Louis' twin sister'?


61Likes
197Comments
3887Views
AA

4. The Interrogation(s)

It is official. I am the most awkward person on this planet.

 

Apparently during the night, when I was sharing a room with the sexy Irish mofo and the others, I sleep-rambled about holes. Just when I thought that everyone would have forgotten about it... but apparently my subconscious mind hadn’t because 'I went on about it for around half an hour and no one could get to sleep.' Well, that's what Louis told me anyway. He also told me that I'd mumbled about curly hair during my sleep, which has now given him the crazy idea that I'm obsessed with Harry. I mean, is he crazy? I don't like Harry! And anyway, I can't like Harry! He's Lou's best friend, so he's practically my brother. I think Louis should take a nap and re-evaluate all of his thoughts about me liking Harry. How many times have I even said 'Harry'?

 

Another thing that didn't help with the whole 'trying to be normal and datable' thing was that it took both Louis and Harry to get me out of bed. They literally had to grab onto both of my legs and drag me as I desperately tried to cling onto my mattress. I'm sure it was quite a sight.

 

I just hate waking up and I always have done. As I have said plenty of times, I love both my bed and my dream world a lot more than the real world. Because who would prefer a world where you're an awkward, creepy girl than a world where you can be whatever you want to be? In my dream world I can be a professional pianist, or a well know and loved actress or an Olympic athlete! The last one isn't ever going to happen because I'm the least sporty person on this planet, but the point is: I can be anything that I want to be but in the real world I'm not even close to my dream. But hey, there is one positive of waking up, and that's breakfast.

 

Breakfast is a beautiful thing and I want to marry whoever decided that it's the most important meal of the day. At breakfast there are so many choices. Do I have pancakes covered in golden syrup or waffles covered in chocolate sauce? Do I have toast with butter or jam, or do I have a croissant instead? It's a hard decision I face every morning but whatever option I choose tastes like heaven.

 

“You're seriously going to eat all of that?” Zayn says, causing all eyes to fall on both me and my two plates full of food.

“Yes? You don't expect me to choose between waffles and pancakes do you?!” Okay when I said that whatever I choose tastes like heaven, it's true...mainly because I choose both.

“I just don't understand how you can eat all that and still look like... not erm fat.”

“It's all thanks to the fast metabolism I was blessed with, I think.” I say while tucking into my third waffle.

 

I suddenly become very self-conscious as all of the boys are still staring at me. I swear that's happened a lot recently... and not in a good way. They aren't looking at me because I'm a supermodel or whatever; they're looking at me because they probably can't believe that someone can be that weird.

 

“Will you all just stop looking at me?!”

 

I recieve a chorus of mumbled 'sorrys' in response which makes another silence settle between us, but this time it is an awkward silence. Hooray.

 

“Can I 'av a sip of your juice?” says the Irish beast.

 

Hold on. He wants a sip of my juice? A sip of my juice? If he takes a sip of my juice his saliva is going to go into my juice and then.... WE WILL HAVE PRACTICALLY KISSED. Our DNA is going to flow together in my glass of orange juice.

 

“S-sure.” I stammer out.

 

I watch as he gently places his lips around the rim of my glass and slowly tilts his head back as the juice pours into his mouth. His adam's apple bobs as he swallows and I find myself completely mesmerized.

 

“Taylor? You okay?” Trust Harry to burst my bubble.

“Yeah? Why wouldn't I be?” I laugh nervously before avoiding eye contact of everyone who is sat at the table and instead solely focus on stuffing my breakfast into my mouth.

“You were just star-”

“Yes, I was staring at you. I like your curly hair, okay?” I speak with my mouth full. How attractive.

 

What is Harry doing?! He nearly revealed my love for the blonde Irishman to the whole table! My quick thinking saved the day, though.

 

“Aha! I knew you liked Harry!” Lou exclaims loudly while pointing his index finger right at me. Did no one ever tell him that it is rude to point? And once again, all eyes are on me... including Niall's.

“I- erm no, his hair...and the juice and it's rude to point!” Okay, I don't know if anyone even understood that because I know that I didn't.

“Wait, what?”

 

Aha! Maybe confusing them all is the best way to get off the topic...

 

“Panic attack...waffles....Irishman... toad in the hole.” I ramble.

“Oh my god!” Lou exclaims for the second time today. It's only 7:02am and he's already exclaimed twice... he needs to calm down.

“What?”

“What?”

“Wait, what?”

“What are you what-ing at?”

“You.”

“What?”

“Let's talk in the kitchen.”

 

I grab onto Louis' arm and drag him into the kitchen where we can have a conversation consisting of only the word 'what' without having four pairs of eyes judging us.

 

“Okay, what were you 'oh my god-ing' at?”

“Oh! So that's what you were what-ing at!”

“Well, yeah...”

“I've figured it out! You don't only like Haz but you love lil' Nialler as well!”

 

Wait. Stop. Drop. Roll. Evacuate.

 

How on earth did Louis figure out that I liked Niall from my random ramble?! Okay, he is a bit off with the whole 'liking Haz' thing but he managed to figure out that I liked Niall? HOW?

 

“How did you figure that out?!”

“Aha! So I was right, you do like Haz and Nialler!” Yep, he exclaimed again.

“No... sort of... no! I don't like Harold!”

“Then why are you blushing and denying it?” Louis wears a 'I'm right and you're wrong' smirk, and it annoys the peanut butter out of me.

“Wha- I am not blushing! And I'm denying it because it's not true!” I am getting so frustrated that my voice is starting to do that annoying thing where it goes really high and squeaky.

“Tay, I'm your twin... I can see right through you!”

“Yeah right...” I mumble but Louis doesn't seem to hear me.

 

He returns back to his guests who, for some reason, are all still sat in an awkward silence. I thought that the fact that I have left the room would cause the awkward silence to leave with me, but apparently not.

 

It's comical really; Louis saying that he can see right through me, when in fact I've been hiding something from him for seven years. He may think that he knows me like the back of his hand but he really doesn't.

 

I've never told him about how lonely I feel or how I feel that I don't fit into our family at all. I've never told him that at the age of eleven, I saved up a lot of money so that I could take all of my piano exams. Or the fact that I am actually grade 8 at piano and that I had an interview for the Royal Academy of Music. I know it's not his fault that he doesn't know because I have practically hidden it from him. But if he can really see through me, like he says he can, he should have surely found out all of this by now.

 

I wish that I could confide in him and have that one person that really does know everything about me, but it's never going to happen. I'm too scared of letting people see the real me because if they don't like the weird girl that I am, then who's going to be there for me when I really need them?

 

Instead of going back to finish off my breakfast, I go upstairs to get dressed for school. There is something about my previous thoughts that make me completely lose my appetite and that's not like me at all.

 

At my school, all sixth formers have to dress smartly, probably because they want to avoid having chavs roaming the school in matching tracksuits, so I pull on my cream blouse and a pair of dark skinny jeans before placing a pair of black plimsolls on my feet. I then grab my beatles satchel (because I literally take it everywhere) and go out the door, not wanting to wait for my brother or his friends. (Outfit: http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=59588175 )

 

I hate walking into school with my brother or the other boys because literally every pair of eyes follow you. I think it's something to do with my brother being loved by most girls in our year... And me being my awkward self; I always end up doing something stupid when everyone is looking, hence why I am avoiding that embarrassment.

 

It has always been a problem, having a brother like Lou, because back in year seven, most girls became 'friends' with me because they wanted to come round to my house so that they could stare at Louis eating a banana or to catch a glimpse of him shirtless after a shower. Neither of which ever happened, because Louis hates bananas and he always gets changed straight after having his shower. Sucks for them.

 

When all of the girls realised that they would barely see Lou at all, and instead would have to listen to me rambling on about how I didn't know whether it was weird or not that I could lick my elbow, they never came round again.... or spoke to me in fact. One girl carried on speaking to me, though, but I really wish she hadn't.

 

Jasmine. Even her name makes my blood boil. I'm pretty sure she's a relative of the devil... maybe a niece or a daughter, in fact. Her stupid hair is always perfect and she always wears really nice clothes. She doesn't fall over thin air or scare away boys. She is literally the exact opposite of me. Oh and did I mention that she happens to be Louis' girlfriend?

 

She comes round at least once a week and I have to sit there pretending that I'm not imagining her face covered in make-up melting off. And to make matter worse, for some reason my whole family loves her and I know that they all wish that she could take my place.

 

Jasmine's so pretty isn't she, Taylor? Why don't you look like her?” One of the many comments I receive from my six year old sister, Lily, whenever Jasmine breathes.

Jasmine got all A*s in her GCSEs... why couldn't you have worked as hard as her? It's probably because you spend more time tucked up in bed than doing anything productive.” That's probably my favourite comment from my mum. I think it shows how well she knows me.

 

Louis knows that I hate her but he doesn't know why, and I never want him to find out. I prefer pretending that I like Jasmine than having my whole family know about my hatred for her because if they found out, the first question they would ask is 'why?' and that's something that I don't want to tell them. Telling them why I hate Jasmine will give them another reason to be ashamed of me... because people like Louis don't get harassed by stupid, pretty girls and it will be another reason that I'm not as perfect as him.

 

I'm walking down the street with my beatles satchel swinging to and fro, when I hear a voice calling my name.... a deep voice.

 

Oh god, someone isn't going to kidnap me are they?! I should have waited for Lou and the boys and walked with them. Did I even bring my pepper spray so I at least have a chance to run away after burning the kidnapper's eyes?

 

I start to walk faster as the voice gets nearer and nearer.

 

“Taylor! Slow down!” The voice whines.

 

I feel a strong hand grip onto my shoulder before being turned around. I shut my eyes and brace myself before opening them to reveal... not a kidnapper. Instead, I see a breathless Harry. Well, that's a relief.

 

“Did you not hear me shouting you?!” He says while trying to catch his breath.

“Erm... no.” I lie.

“I know you heard me.” Damn it. I think whenever I lie my eyes go really wide as if I'm a deer caught in headlights... “Don't you want to walk with me or something?” He winks at me but I can see some sort of anxiousness in his eyes.

“No it's just... you know you're you and I'm sure you don't want to walk with me because I'm me.”

 

Harry looks genuinely confused by my reply, as if he isn't aware of the fact that I am super awkward or that most people avoided me like the plague. And can I just point out that I said 'super' in that sentence and that pretty much confirms why no one should be seen with me. Ever.

 

“But I do want to walk with you...” Is he being serious? He looks serious. “even though you're you.” He adds on with a wink.

“Really?”

“Of course!” He playfully places his arm round my shoulder and keeps it there for the rest of the walk.

 

~*~

 

School goes quite quickly, actually, and I even manage to avoid Jasmine which is a massive bonus. Now all I want to do is go home and change into my pyjamas and eat some food before having a nap. But it's a Monday and that means that I have a two hour slot in the music block.

 

If I want to pass my audition, I'm going to need all the practice I can get so I shouldn't complain about it but some days I just don't feel up to it. I think the cause of those days is the fact that I still have the self doubt inside of me telling me that I'm not good enough for RAM so what's the point in even trying? But the image of me playing a grand piano to a crowd full of awestruck people keeps me going, and I would never forgive myself if I didn't try my absolute hardest to achieve my dream.

 

I enter the practically deserted music block and go into the same practice room I go in every time. It's the room where I played my very first notes and somehow the room comforts me. It pushes away all the self doubt and reminds me of how far I've come with my piano playing.

 

I sit down at the dusty piano and place my hands softly on the keys. The first chords of John Lennon's 'Imagine' start to fill the room and I slowly begin singing the meaningful lyrics.

 

“You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one” I sing softly, finishing the song.

 

I then move on to my second warm up piece, which is Queen's 'Love of My Life'. I let the music take over as my hands move freely up and down the piano. Each note I play and sing causes the same feeling to erupt inside of me. The feeling where I feel as if I am home; as if nothing else in the world matters.

 

Once I am fully warmed up, I play through all three of my audition pieces; Beethoven's Rondo Sonata in C minor, J.S. Bach's Prelude in F minor and Bedrich Smetana's Polka de Salon. I play each one several times, making sure that every single note is perfect.

 

After I realise that I've gone over my two hour slot time, I gather my books into my bag, quietly leave the music block and head home.

 

~*~

 

I walk into the strangely peaceful house. It is strangely peaceful because I was pretty much expecting my whole family to be stood by the door, ready to interrogate me on my whereabouts. But no one is stood waiting. In fact, it is so quiet that it seems like no one is even home which is amazing because it means I can avoid an interrogation and have a really long nap.

 

My bed is calling me as I run up the stairs and I can't wait to just dive in it and to not resurface for a couple of hours. But knowing my luck, I do have an interrogation waiting for me.

 

Where have you been?”

“Nice to see you too.” I fake smile. “And can I ask what you're doing in my house?”

“Lou insisted that I came over.” she smirks at me as I grit my teeth in annoyance.

“And where might he be?”

He's out with Harry getting some food.” She suddenly seems really bored of the conversation even though it has practically just begun.

“Oo! What are they getting?” I had somehow forgotten that I haven’t eaten for a few hours before the word 'food' was mentioned.

Who cares? It's probably full of fat and I'm not going to touch it.” She stands up from where she had been sat on my bed. My bed. “So where has little Taylor been? Has she been doing something that she isn't supposed to do? I'm sure Lou would be so disappointed to hear about you and your drug addiction...”

 

Wait, what? My drug addiction?! I've never even touched a drug! Well not a naughty drug. I've seen the way that Lindsey Lohan has turned out and I never want to go down the same road as her. What is Jasmine even talking about?!

 

“What? I don't do drugs!”

“I know, but Louis won't know that when I tell him.” She smiles evilly at me as my mouth hangs open - another one of my attractive habits.

“What is your problem?”

“Me? I don't have a problem, sweetie. I'm not the one doing drugs, am I? So what are you hiding from Louis? He never shuts up about how suspicious you've been and it means that I'm being deprived from my making out sessions, so you better tell him whatever it is or I'll make sure he knows something a lot worse.”

 

Ew. Did she say 'making out sessions'? I haven't even had my first kiss and Louis is 'making out' with the devil's daughter or niece (I still haven't decided which one)?! EW.

 

“I just...” I stop in thought, trying to think of a better excuse than the Nandos one that I used last time. “I go to my friend's house.” Jasmine just laughs at my lame excuse.

Honey, you don't have any friends. Just spit it out! I'm sure it's not even interesting anyway, so I have no idea why Louis is so desperate to find out what you're hiding.”

“I-”

“HELLOOO!” Louis and Harry both shout as they burst through the door.

“Tay? When did you get home?” Louis smiles but I can see the confusion in his eyes.

“Oh I've been home a while...” I lie.

 

An awkward silence falls between the four of us as I desperately pray that Jasmine won't say anything. But then again, she is the daughter (or niece) of the devil so she probably will.

 

“Can we eat?” Jasmine beaks the silence. “I'm starving!”

“Y-yeah, sure.”

 

Lou goes downstairs with Jasmine and I collapse onto my bed with relief. My secret is safe... for now. But I know that Jasmine is going to do anything to get it out of me.

 

“What are you hiding, Tay? I'm starting to get worried.” Oh fudgesticks, I forgot that Harry is there. And just when I thought my interrogation was over!

“Nothing! I'm not hiding anything! Why does everyone think that?!” I snap, slamming my bag down onto my bed with frustration.

 

The loose sheet music falls softly out of my bag after the initial impact of my bag hitting the bed. My eyes shoot to Harry's to see if he has noticed, and he has.

 

Right here and now, I know that it is all over; my dreams of becoming a professional pianist and getting into RAM. Harry is Louis' best friend so of course he is going to tell him. And then Lou will let it slip with mum and dad, and then they'll pull me out of my audition for RAM. Everything I've worked for... it's all going to be over.

Join MovellasFind out what all the buzz is about. Join now to start sharing your creativity and passion
Loading ...