Love Will Remember

Kelseys just a regular high schooler, has bestfriends, and is a pretty average girl. She has problems with her parents so she doesn't really have supporters in her life. One day when she goes to the fountain where she usually goes because she can't deal with her parents at home she meets a boy named Justin. They become best friends but little did she know she would end up falling so deep in love with this boy. She falls, and she falls hard. But the harder you fall, the more you get hurt. But no matter what happens . . . love will remember

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18. We lit the whole world up, before we blew it up ..

*Justin’s P.O.V*

I’ve been over thinking this so much lately. I don’t even cry that often but I’ve been doing it so much lately. I’ll find myself just staring into space, thinking and before I know it a few tears have slid down my cheek. It’s crazy how one night can change everything. One night can tear my whole world apart. One night I let my everything slip right out of my hands. It’s like everything was fine, we were perfectly happy before this one night. A stupid party, I got drunk, I did dumb shit that has made this big mess. All of sudden she stopped loving me and never even wanted to see my face again.  I mean, the first time I met Kelsey she was crying. I could see how broken and sad she was. I couldn’t watch this girl cry her eyes out and walk away. I felt the urge to talk to her. To cheer her up. She has been broken since the beginning. She was just so good at hiding it. But once we fell in love, I could tell, I could see that she wasn’t broken anymore. I had fixed that broken heart. And now I’m the one to have broken it. Earlier today, when I was talking to her at Tim Horton’s I knew everything she holding back. She was keeping herself together, trying her best to not break down in front of me.

 I needed to clear my so I decided to take a walk cause that’s what I like to do to clear my head. It was getting pretty dark and cloudy out but I decided to go anyway. I grab a jacket and walk out the door.

 

*Kelsey’s P.O.V*

The thought of Justin has never left my head and I hate that. Getting over him was not going to be easy. I mean, I still care about him. I still love him somehow even after all he’s done. I’ve been non stop crying and I physically feel hurt. My body feels sore. It’s like the emotional pain is becoming physical.

I suddenly hear a loud strike of thunder. Depressing weather only can make me more depressed. I grab my jacket and walk outside and look at the sky. It’s getting gray and cloudy and dark. At this point I didn’t even care and I just began walking. I needed to go somewhere where no one was around. Where no one could bother me and where I could be left alone. Because when you’re alone no one can hurt you…

 I didn’t even know where I was going to walk, I was just gonna find my way around. Maybe go to the fountain or something but staying in that house only made me overwhelmed with my thoughts.

I began walking around the neighborhood. Trying to loosen my mind and forget about everything that has been going on.

There was another loud strike of thunder and I looked up at the sky. Rain drops slowly started falling. I slowly look up into the sky. It was gray and gloomy..sorta like how I was feeling. They gradually came faster and harder until it was pouring rain. It was aggressive rain and I only started to get soaked. The water began to drench my clothes and hair but I was not seeing a reason to care if it did. The rain reminded me of something. I couldn’t quite remember of what but then it hit me.

*FLASHBACK*

We walk into the rain holding hands. We run into the car and start to drive to his place..

 ..

Finally we are at Justin's place and Justin gets out of the car and walks around it opening the door for me. He grabs my hand and helps me get out. I'm ready to quickly run into his house but Justin stops me. He presses me against the car and leans in so close to me we’re less than an inch apart and says "Why don't we  enjoy the rain. Just for a second."

Now that I think about it, the rain did feel really good. It made me feel good, as the water was soaking my hair and splashing into skin.

 Justin leans in slowly and kisses me. He kisses me so sweetly and I loved the taste of his lips with rain. It had never felt like this before. It felt different and a good different. Our lips moved in sync and Justin grabs my waist and pulls me closer if that were even possible.

We hear a loud lightning strike that startled the both of us and interrupted the kiss.

*END OF FLASHBACK*

Now I remember of what the rain suddenly reminded me of…

The memory made me feel sad yet happy at the same time. Sad because I honestly miss it when neither of us had a care in the world besides each other. We were truly happy together and enjoyed each others company. All we needed was each other and no one else.

But the memory also made me feel happy because those were the best times I’ve ever spent with Justin. Those are the types of moments I’ll cherish forever whether we’re together or not.

I sighed. This wasn’t going to be easy moving on but I had to face it. The memories are still there. Those will never be erased. I at least had to accept that..

I’d walked quite a distance away from my house. I was getting so wet, my skinny jeans and jacket was completely drenched where they were heavy to walk in. My vans were darker cause of the water and they felt heavier. I decided to just walk back home finding that this idea to walk around was stupid. I turn my heels around and stop in my tracks surprised. Or I should say shocked because there I saw Justin..standing right in front of me.

He is only a couple feet away from me and is staring right at me. His clothes are completely soaked and so is his hair.

“Justin what are you doing, how did you find me?” I say through the loud noise of the rain crashing down.

“I didn’t mean to find you. I guess it’s just meant to be.” And he starts to look down at the puddles of rain.

“I can’t keep seeing you.”

He slowly looks up. “Why?”

He walks  towards me and says “Why do you keep pushing my away?”

I start to look down at my feet  “Why are you still trying to get me back?”

I really didn’t understand, after all I’ve just been pushing him away.

Justin lifts my chin up with his finger  “I’ll never give up on you. I’ll never give up on us.”

“Don’t you remember you hurt me?” I crinkled my eyebrows upwards, while also remembering that horrible image in my head of Justin kissing another girl that wasn’t me ..

He leans into my ear and says “How could I forget?” he then whispers “just give me another chance.”

There’s a pause and the only thing we can hear is the sound of the rain hitting us.  Our hair is soaked. Water is dripping off of our eyelashes.

Me and Justin at this point are only an inch apart. He looks down at me. Staring into my eyes. Then he starts staring at my lips. He continues to and inches closer so they almost touch. His mouth is parted open and I can see the want from him. I start to stare at his lips too, they looked wet and pink from the rain. My mouth was also parted ready to kiss inching closer where they almost touch but don’t. The amount of how much I wanted this was real, but I don’t know why.

It’s night outside but the stars and moonlight is keeping it light. Justin grabs above my waist and I put my arms on top of his forearms and grasp them. He pulls me closer so our bodies are touching. I can feel his soaked clothes through mine, that’s just how close we were. I’m on my tippy toes and our gazes never move. This felt so wrong, yet it felt so right. Somehow being this close, made me feel good again. I get lost in his eyes just like how I always used to. And I remember what this feels like. The feeling of love, like there was no one else in this world. It was just me and him, inseparable. It was pretty cold out from the cold rain, but his body warmth was keeping me warm enough. I remove my arms from his forearms and wrap them around his neck. I inch closer to his face and he does the same to mine. His eyes move to my lips, and my eyes stare at his lips inching closer.

Justin tilts his head and closes his eyes while he slowly leans in as I do the same, but then  I realize I just couldn’t do this. I couldn’t take him back, and I wouldn’t.

I quickly lean back and say “Justin, I can’t. It’s not right.”

Justin slowly opens his eyes and sighs “Why isn’t it right?”

I pull out of his grasp.

“Because it’s not.” I throw my head back in frustration and confusion.

“Kels-“ but I cut him off and say

“It’s getting late I got to go.” I cut him off and I pass Justin, before he grabs my arm.

“Can you just wait a second and let me finish?” Justin has a pleading look on his face.

I pause for a second and stop being tense. “What is it Justin?” I sigh.

He stares at me, long and hard.  He stares right through my eyes, never moving his gaze, I could see he was getting tensed up, and serious. He was clenching his jaw, not making a single move.

“Just tell me . . . do you never want to see me again?”

I don’t know what to say. I start tensing up, I get butterflies in my stomach, I start getting dizzy cause I’m realizing that he’s being serious. But if I wanted to see him again I would just crawl back to him right? But that’s not what I want.

I look down and slowly nod, realizing that I’m probably crushing him from my response. And somehow crushing myself.

He doesn’t even flinch or make a move. It’s silent, besides of the sound of the pouring rain.

He lifts my head up with his finger, and kisses my forehead. He slowly but softly whispers

“Goodbye Kelsey.”

 I didn’t know what to say, I didn’t know what to do. After he said that  I ran back to my house. I got a lump in my stomach, an empty feeling of the thought of not seeing Justin. But I wouldn’t just give in so easily. What we did back there felt so good. It felt right again. I had felt that spark, that touch I’ve been craving for so long it feels like. But I knew I couldn’t do it. I don’t want to have to go through the risk of getting hurt again. I ran to the front of my house door and walk inside the house shutting the door behind me. My breathing is hard from the running and adrenaline and just everything that has just happened. I take off my jacket and the tears start to slip.

Once again..

*Justin’s P.O.V*

I was taken aback at everything that I had just happened. We had a moment, I felt something and I knew she just had’ve too. She almost gave in, she wanted it but she wouldn’t let herself do it. I could feel it, her wanting. I throw my head back in the rain and look down, kicking a puddle of water. I look all around, seeing that she has already ran off into the distance. I run my fingers through my hair out of frustration. These days without Kelsey I’ve felt so empty. Like a piece of me was missing.

I couldn’t tell if it was tears or raindrops on my face right now. I can tell she is pushing her feelings away and I honestly don’t why.  But after all her happiness is what matters to me. If this is what she wanted, I had to accept it.

 

And I guess move on.

 

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A/N

this chapter took me so long and i worked so hard trying to make it as perfect as possible

i really hope you guys like cause i only do this for you:)

im going to the states to CALIFORNIA tommorow sklvnsflsd i cant wait i dont know when ill be able to update hopefully soon:)

comment what you think about this chapter i need to know!

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