when i close my eyes.

Me. Amy green. When I close my eyes I can pretend it's not happening. When I close my eyes, I can go wherever I want and be what ever I want. Then I open them and come crashing to reality.
Story through the eyes of Amy Green, her life and what she does.


2. my evening

"Amy" my mum called.

I sighed, put down my pen and diary, pulled off my best fake smile and walked downstairs.

"Yes mum?"

"Dinner's ready, I made your favourite, lasange!"

"REALLY!" I jumped about happily, lasagne really was my favourite dish.

"Go set the table then."

I did as I was told, and soon we were sat down eating our meal. I closed my eyes and imagined that I was completely happy, but my sister was away for the weekend, and my dad was away on business, so the picture wasn't complete. I sighed. It was time to give up trying to be happy.

"That was a big sigh, anything wrong?" my mum asked,

"Nope," I replied, and nothing ever was,"can I go upstairs, I have some homework to do?"

"Sure sweetie."

I ran up the stairs. Over the years I have taught myself how to silently cry. I stood in front of the mirror and watched the tears fall.

This was mainly my evenings, crying silently. I always splashed my face with cold water before saying goodnight in an attempt to stop it from being obvious to my family. Not that they'd notice or anything. They hardly look at me.

I drift in and out of my thoughts and gaze around the room. I didn't deserve this life. I don't deserve a loving family. I'm not a charitable person, so what did I do to deserve this amazing life? 

My room is big. White with dashes of black. A large bed. A wardrobe full of amazing clothes. My room was sophisticated yet childish in a way that's difficult to achieve. Sighing to myself whilst salty tears ran down my face for no reason other than guilt. I really am I horrible person. I walk into my bathroom, splash cold water on my face and go downstairs to say goodnight.

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