Feel Again (Louis Tomlinson)

{Book 3 - COMPLETE} All Marley Pennington wanted to do since her freshman year of high school was to turn her life around. To be someone she always wanted to be, and when she gets her dream job, everything seems to be headed in the right direction.
But Louis Tomlinson is another story. He's alone, afraid, and just wanting everything to go back to normal, before everything was ruined. Marley, a well-liked and cheery person tries to change Louis' look on life and love.

"Yeah with you
I can feel again
I'm feeling better ever since you know me
I was a lonely soul but that's the old me"

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9. Marley

Chapter 9 - Marley

“Hello?” I sniff, wiping the tears from my eyes as I step onto the bus. I know it’s late, it’s past midnight, but I am just hoping Parker or Amabel is here. I need someone to talk to. I try again but no one answers.

I blow my nose from a tissue box in the kitchen. It feels strange to be on the tour bus, but this is the only place I knew where to look. I have tried calling Parker and Amabel, but they aren’t answering and I don’t have the boys’ numbers. Yes, I called Zayn that one time to help me take Louis out of his car, but I accidenly deleted my call log and now I have nothing.

When I got that phone call only an hour ago, I didn’t really know what to make of it. After all this time of ignoring us, her own damn family, she calls and wants sympathy? I don’t think so. I love her, how can someone not love their own sister? She didn’t even say why she needed us so desperately. It’s not fair to show up to someone’s doorstep and demand help, especially if you have made no contact with them in two years.

Yes, I have a sister. She is two year younger than I am. I am twenty, she is eighteen. Although the last time I saw her she had gotten her driver’s license only a few weeks before and she had already started covering her body in tattoos. After she left us my mom and dad and I never talked about her much. It saddened all three of us to a point where her name was never even mentioned.

I find a room somewhere in the back of the bus and let myself cry, something I don’t do very often. I am usually strong and presentable. I wipe under my eyes, and when I pull back my hands, my fingers are covered in dark makeup. I groan, but my head snaps up when I hear footsteps.

“What are you doing here?” A voice asks harshly, and when I look up, I am surprised to see Louis standing there. His eyes are red and bloodshot, a sign he’s been drinking, and recently.

“I’m sorry. I…I was just looking for Parker and…” I trail off, standing up.

“No one is here.” He frowns.

“Yeah, I know.” I avoid is gaze, trying to side-step him.

"I didn’t say you had to leave...” Louis says softly, surprising me. My lips part and I meet his blue eyes as I sit back down. Louis closes the door and comes and sits next to me. Even from here, I can smell the alcohol on his breath. He has stubble growing on his face, and even now, in the middle of the night with him drunk off is British ass, he looks so damn beautiful. I’m not going to deny it. He’s so hot. “What’s wrong?”

I immediately like drunk Louis. He’s nicer, more caring. “Family issues. I don’t really want to bother you with that.”

“You won’t be.” He says, eyes never leaving mine.

“Oh…okay.” I whisper, then start speaking. “Well, you probably don’t know this, but I have a younger sister. Her name is Violet. She is eighteen right now. She doesn’t live with us anymore. Two years ago, she kind of moved out, and it wasn’t exactly something we all agreed on.” I laugh because I am too emotionally drained to do anything else. Louis’ intense stare is making me a bit uncomfortable but I keep going. It’s almost like the roles are switched; now, I am the one spilling my guts. “Violet kept saying how nothing was fair anymore. Her grades went in the toilet and she dropped out of high school after two years, choosing to run away with an older boy instead of us. She chose someone she had met at a bar instead of her own family.” A single tear rolls down my cheek.

“Why?” Louis asks.      

“I don’t know,” I answer honestly. “We got along so well all the time, but I guess she chose she didn’t want us anymore.”

“So why are you crying?” Louis scoots closer, but just barely.

“She called me tonight.” I sigh, running my hands through my hair. “After two years of nothing, not a word, she calls me. You know what she tells me?” I speak before I get an answer. “She tells me that she is pregnant.”

Louis’ eyes go wide.

“Crazy right? She needs money and a place to stay. But it’s hard to let her in after all this time, after all these years of thinking she was never coming back. Then she just came right back into our lives and I don’t know what to do. A part of me is so relieved she came back because she’s my sister and nothing will change that, but another part is so angry, so angry at her for leaving us.” I look at Louis again.

Much to my surprise, Louis reassuringly puts a hand on my thigh. “It’s alright.” He says. Who is this person and what have they done with the Louis Tomlinson I have known? We haven’t known each other long, but I like him so much already.

This is the Louis I like. Although he’s drunk and probably won’t remember this tomorrow, it feels so nice to be able to just be here with him. He’s so beautiful, just scared of what he doesn’t know, and what he doesn’t know is honesty.

            “Thank you.” I whisper to him, giving him a smile. And it only grows wider when he smiles back.

*****

“Do you think she slept here all night?” A voice wakes me up in the morning. When I open my eyes and look around, I am met with six pairs of eyes. Liam, Niall, Zayn, Parker, Harry and Amabel are all looking at me curiously.

“Hey, sleepy head. What’s going on?” Parker speaks.

“I’m sorry,” I mumble, sitting up. “I came here last night looking for you, but no one was here. Well, Louis came a little later and we talked.”

“You talked?” Harry asks.

“Yeah, I have a lot going on right now and he just listened, even though he was drunk off his ass he was very kind.” I give them a small smile.

“How drunk?” Liam asks.

"Very,” I answer. “Listen, I’m sorry for intruding, but I didn’t know where else to go. I’ve got family issues that I don’t really want to talk about right now. I don’t want to seem rude, I can go.”

“No, please stay. You’re welcome to.” Amabel smiles and they nod.

"Thank you.” I say sincerely. I walk to the kitchen to get some water. When I look up from the sink, I see Louis stumbling in, looking like hell. He sees me and immediately halts, then circumvents me and disappears into the front room of the bus. I frown and follow him.

Since everyone else seems to be busy with their own thing I switch on Jeopardy. Louis gives me a weird look, but I ignore it. I love this show, it‘s so much fun to learn something new and see how many questions you can get right. Louis just sits on the couch and massages his temples. I don’t even want to imagine how much of a hangover he has right now.

“Louis.” I whisper. “Can we talk?”

“Please,” he snaps, “keep your voice down. It’s loud enough in here as it is, and there is nothing to talk about anyways. So please, carry on with your life.”

Wow. That was rude. “Fine.” I say, more sadly than rudely. There he goes again, back to rude and cold Louis. I don’t like this side. I wish he would talk to me. I thought after last night we could be friends. That’s what I want. Why doesn’t he like me? What have I done? Was it something I said? I replay every conversation we’ve had but nothing comes to mind. I frown, most people seem to like me…just because I’m likeable. Is it me or him?

Now we both know something about the other person that one else in this group of people knows. It gives us a connection, and I want something out of it. But by the way he’s looking at me right now, I’m getting the impression that our interests are anything but mutual.

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