The overwhelming thoughts in my head

My life had always been boring, really. Just an average day, every single day. Then suddenly everything was busy and bright and I couldn't think any more. *contains swearing*

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3. Class

As I walked towards the school, skirting down back roads and alleys, I wondered once more why the hell I was doing this. My phone was on full blast in my ears, which I’d hoped would block out some of the thoughts.

It didn't.

All it did was add another set of slurring sentences to the ones tumbling in my head. And this meant I couldn’t understand a word that anyone was thinking, which was at least a good thing. Some people thought the most disgusting, psychopathic or crazy thoughts; which made me recoil when coming into contact with just a single word. It also felt a little like prying into their private space, no matter that they were the ones invading my mind. Thoughts were your own. I sure as hell wouldn’t want someone listening in on mine.

Thankfully I’d only come across a few people on my journey; after I woke up at dawn I was already in my uniform, so I’d just jumped down and started on my way. I had no idea what time it was. Probably around seven.

I reached the imposing chain-link fence of the school and yanked at the gate, which was padlocked tight. It occurred to me that the school gates opened at eight, something they’d briefly mentioned when I joined, though I hadn’t thought to listen, as I usually arrived with seconds to spare.

With a deep breath, I entwined my fingers in the thin mesh and pulled myself up, reaching for another handhold and climbing higher, until I was straddling the top of the fence. There was a small moment of pain as I pulled my leg over it, a deep scratch left from the sharp wire edges, and then I jumped down.

What did I hear I hate the world I bet it’s one of those pupils that is not enough pay I need to get a proper house I’m thirsty better go check.

There was a rumbling voice in my head, deep and gruff. The caretaker? I looked around and saw his shed across the playground, the door beginning to creep open. This was the first time that my telepathy, or whatever it was called, had come in useful. A figure emerged and looked around, but I had darted behind the science block.

I hid inside the bike sheds, where it was peaceful. There weren’t any buildings near enough for me to be able to hear any teachers. But sure enough, the pupils started trickling past.

Shit I’d better do that homework should’ve gotten more sleep last night I’m hungry this coffee is good oh there’s James I’m so fat shouldn’t have eaten breakfast I’m tir­ed where’s my pencil case wow this school is big who’s that guy in the bike sheds hope Mr Kelly gets fired oh no Lily’s coming to talk to me can’t believe he broke up with me who does he think he is I’m thirsty where are the toilets again wonder where George is he didn’t answer his phone.

In the midst of the voices all calling out to be heard, there was one I recognised that seemed to be thinking about me.

“Hey, George, where you been, man?” A real voice, an out loud voice, distracted me from trying to understand the mess of thoughts. They still buzzed at me though, filling up my head, which I slowly lifted to look at Rafe, who was walking towards me.

When he saw my face though, he stopped dead. “Dude, what’s up? You look like absolute shit.”

“Just… tired.” Searching for the words I needed to string together a sentence, these popped out at me, from some sixth former’s conversation across the grounds.

“Did you even sleep at all? Sure, the new FIFA’s good, but I can’t have you collapsing on me on lessons. You know I need you for maths, or I’m fucked.”

He laughed, expecting me to join in, but I only managed a weak smile. “Sorry. Just… got caught up in a match.”

I took his offered hand and pulled myself up from the ground, brushing the dirt off of my shirt. The bell rang in the distance and he began walking towards our form, while I stumbled behind him.

Oh there’s the bell I don’t think Katie likes me any more I’m hungry can’t be bothered with this George seems weird they’re being so slow wonder if Sam’s going to talk to me today my homework’s in my bag right that was such an amazing film.

Rafe basically dragged me to form; everything was too overwhelming for me to even walk in a straight line. Relieved at the break, I sunk down into my seat and plugged in my headphones, turning it up to full. Like before, it made all the words indistinguishable, but only made the noise louder.

I turned at a tap on my shoulder. Mrs Hally, my teacher, was standing behind me with her hand outstretched. She said something, but I couldn’t hear her. I pulled out the ear buds. Still I couldn’t understand a word she was saying, the constant buzzing from the thirty or more people in the tiny classroom was just too much.

He’s looking at me do you think he likes me can’t wait for the day to be over I’m so tired she’s such a bitch ow I wish she’d stop hitting me look I’ve got a new message dress hand wipes chocolate mustn’t forget.

“Too much,” I moaned, banging my head hard against the wall, though it didn’t stop anything. I never really believed it would.

Mrs Hally put her hand on my shoulder, which hit me like an electric shock.

He looks ill he should probably go home oh look he’s looking at me oh my god hope my parents get me the new iphone I need a drink I love him so much why did he cheat on me shouldn’t have run all the way here.

“Dress, hand wipes, chocolate,” my muttering was feverish as I rocked back and forth. “Why would he cheat on me? I hope my homework’s in my bag.”

That chocolate was nice what’s wrong with him I want to sleep with her again so jealous can’t believe she won this is so boring don’t understand French at all my afternoon was so amazing.

“This is so boring, I’m thirsty, Katie doesn’t like me anymore.”

I need to pee my hair got all windy and now it looks really bad this class is so noisy hope no-one sees my spot that band is terrible wish I’d been invited to that party I’m thirsty.

“JUST SHUT UP!”

For one second, everything was silent. Everyone just stopped thinking, all at once, as they swivelled in their seats to look up at me. I realised that I was standing up.

“Just shut up, all of you!”

It started again, all the babbling, all the muttering, all the talking. All the noise.

What’s up with George he’s all crazy he’s probably ill eurgh he interrupted my conversation what a freak I always thought he was cool what’s wrong with him he looks like all ill I’m hungry.

I ran out the room, away from all their noise. I just needed them to stop it, all of them. To just be quiet.

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