I Always Will Remember (A Louis Tomlinson Fanfiction) *COMPLETE*

Alice and Irene, two Italian university students, finally manage to have One Direction tickets for their Stadium tour! The band is having one Italian date in the same town where the girls attend university: what happens when they accidentally meet two of the boys around?
See what happens that changes their lives forever!


____ **Some swear words and mature content here and there**____

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30. Chapter Twenty-nine

Irene and I slowly walked back to my car, both quiet and absent-minded, each of us having her own thoughts: personally, I was feeling very awkward, I had some kind of unknown sensation roaming inside my body, as if I wasn't even there, my world being now completely messed up.

I got in the car, waited for my friend to sit next to me and we left that place full of memories.

I drove out of town automatically, without focusing for a single moment on what I was doing, and the silence in my car was heavy as a goddamn rock. The only sound I could perceive was Irene typing on her phone, and I guessed she was sending a text to Zayn, considering the look on her face.

I felt relieved that he wanted to keep in touch with her, knowing this could only mean that my best friend was happy, but the positive feeling faded away in a couple of seconds, because I hadn't been that lucky.

He's gone. Do you realise he's gone? He. Is. GONE.

It was unbelievable but, yeah... Louis wasn't a part of my life anymore. We didn't exchange any cellphone numbers, we had no other way to hear from each other – except for Harry's number, which I still had in my contacts list –, and Louis did not ask anything about how to reach me. Anything at all. It's true, I didn't ask anything as well, but... I just didn't want to play the role of the teenage girl who can't survive without a boy. He was just a boy after all, we spent two days together, and deep inside of me there was an annoying voice telling me I was an idiot: how could I feel like that? It had been too little time to fall in love with someone and think about them that much! Also, how could have I vaguely thought about following him? Because I did, I actually thought about it, I would have changed everything I had planned for my future just to be with a random guy. So immature!

You could not set aside your future for a boy. Never! He might leave you anytime... and then?

You'd be with your ass on the ground, completely on your own.

Nevertheless, my rational side couldn't convince me completely, and even though I agreed with it, I felt it was so fucking wrong. My heart desperately wanted to rise up against it, but... Guess what?

It was too late. Plus, Louis didn't make any step towards me about that, probably because the idea of carrying on our relationship did not cross his mind for a second: he was successful, he had so many things to do that he certainly couldn't waste his time on a girl that lived in another country!

I wish he had, though...

Suddenly, waves of pain hit me and overflew me, causing me to feel like I couldn't breath anymore, and I started sobbing almost uncontrollably.

“Alice!? What's the matter girl? Hey....” Irene immediately caressed my arm, while I was having a hard time keeping the car on the right side of the street, not being able to let out a single word.

“Stop the car darling, c'mon...” she suggested me, and I entered an empty parking lot, turning the engine off and resting my head on the wheel, my shoulders shuddering violently as I kept on drenching my arms with my own tears.

“S-Sorry Irene... I... I didn't mean to... Sorry!” I managed to say, but my friend assured me it was okay, and hugged me, gently rubbing my back:

“Don't worry... Let it aaaall out, and you'll feel better afterwards”

I sobbed for the following minutes, whining and blowing my nose from time to time, but finally my chest was freed from all the pain and sadness, so I sit back and took a deep breath, rubbing my eyes so that I could see things normally.

“Better?”

“Yeah... Thanks”

“Wanna talk about it?” she asked.

“It's just... You know. Him” I shrugged my shoulders, not knowing what else to say.

“Sorry if I'm saying this but... Why didn't you ask him to see each other again...? I mean... you were so cute together and... Well, Zayn did it. We are probably seeing each other in a month, when they'll be in France for the tour. Why couldn't Louis too?”

“You're right, Irene. But... I... I think that... It's because Louis and I both lived this whole thing considering it to be... temporary, you know? From the beginning, we said that we both had our own lives to live and... it just happened that our destinies met”

Irene was still silent, waiting for me to go on:

“I have to get my degree, Irene! I can't give in right now, when I'm half the way to my goal! What if our relationship would have lasted a couple of months? I would have had plenty of things to catch up with and...”

“You cannot live by the 'what if..'s, you know that, right?”

“I know! I just... thought that letting him go was the best thing for us both, and time will prove me right”

“Ok my friend... If you'll be fine with it, I'll be fine too. What do you always say about time? Your favourite quote... how is it?”

“All things must pass” I smiled, remembering the sentence that I tried to keep always in mind.

“Yeah, that one! Now it seems terrible but... You'll get over this, and one day you'll smile again” she encouraged me, and I nodded, feeling slightly better, almost being sure for a moment that I could carry on with my life, without Louis on my side.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

Back home, I spent my day doing everything that I could think of, trying to distract me from the events of the last two days, not even daring to check on Twitter or Tumblr what the boys where doing in their day out in Milan: I could barely look at the posters on my bedroom wall, and everytime I accidentally did it, I couldn't help but to be completely filled with disbelief.

No way I had met them! Impossible! But then my eyes always ended up on Louis, and everything was suddenly real and painful, so I constantly looked away, or exit the room.

I helped my mother doing some cooking together, I played a few songs on my guitar, I even spent a couple of hours studying but I regularly got stuck reading the same line ten times in a row, so I dedicated myself to clean my room from end to end, listening to metal music so that nothing could remind me of them.

I was like a caterpillar tractor, running over every thought that was even slightly related to the boys, and to him in particular, repressing every single one of them with the strongest firmness I was able to. I know it was a bad method but.. I couldn't come up with anything else, and I hoped that I would have soon managed to avoid them without all that difficulty.

You can do it. You must do it.

 

 

That evening, during dinner, I talked about my studies with my parents, so that they did not remember about the show the night before, and therefore decide to ask me something about it, because I obviously didn't feel like sharing all of that with them, and then chose to watch a film that could help me from keeping my brain under strict control. I prepared some pop corn and sweets of various kinds, because food has always been a major source of happiness, and picked a movie.

It was a horror one, the least romantic genre I could think of, and everything was going really well – me watching zombies eating people every two minutes – until my phone suddenly buzzed.

It was two o'clock in the morning, so I wondered who that could be: as soon as I read 'Irene', I relaxed, but I didn't know that the worst was yet to come.

As I read through her text, my heart started hurting a lot, and all of the peace I had desperately tried to reach was slowly shattering. It said:

< Hey my friend, how's it going? Hope you're ok :) Anyway... Check your FB mail ASAP. I didn't want you to know this at the beginning, but when I realised what it was about, I thought you should see it as well... Love you >

What the heck was she talking about? What wasn't I suppose to see?
It must have been about them. It should be, I couldn't explain it otherwise; I was scared to death because I desperately wanted to forget but yet I was eager to know! If Irene believed I should see it, maybe it wasn't something bad. Or at least I hoped so.

I turned on my laptop and nervously tapped over the table waiting for it to be ready: when I finally was on my Facebook and saw the little red notification sign telling me I had a new message, I felt my heart pumping right inside my throat.

Irene had written a short message, and below it there was a Youtube link.

What the hell....?

I didn't even read it and clicked straight on the link, catching my breath when a new window opened: the video was titled 'One Direction performing at Milan, 09/12'. It was from that night's show. Someone should have uploaded it right after the concert, a couple of hours earlier.

I was definitely confused, so I paused and went back to read the message:

< Zayn texted me and asked me to look for some videos of tonight's show, and expressively told me you should see it too. I watched a couple of them, and found this one. Skip at 01:45 >

I went back to the video and did as she told me, my hands almost shaking just by seeing them again on screen. Zayn and Louis were both in frame, waiting to introduce the following song, and the dark-haired boy went first:

“We never dedicate songs but tonight... we wanna make an exception. This one is for two people who helped us a lot recently...”

“We simply want to thank them, and let'em know we will always remember them” Louis added with a sweet voice, smiling.

“Thank you girls, you know who you are” Zayn concluded.

The other boys all nodded, and as the song actually started, I covered my mouth with my hands, my heart suddenly not beating anymore.

From the very first notes, I understood it was 'Summer Love'.

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