more than friends

Have you ever loved someone so much it hurt? You felt the need to keep them safe? To protect them.. When in reality you were the one needing the protection? That is the story of me and my best friend Liam.

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19. a few mistakes

Danny's POV

 

I study the clock's every movement and sound as it strikes 12:00P.M.

 

I bite my lip knowing This was the start of it all. The day every thing would change for me. People would no longer look at me the same. I would no longer be innocent danny. Instead, I would become that pregnant slut down the street. People would look, judge, and treat me in a completely different way. People would not want to be around me, not take the chance to know me. The would decide the second they saw me I was a hoe, or ratchet.

 

I would be labeled by everyone and everything.

 

I let the words sink in as I hear the doctor call out my name, "Danny Anderson." I nod at I look over to maya giving her a weak smile, trying to hide the complete and utter hurt I felt inside.

 

I notice Maya was yet the one nervous enough for the both of us, watching and studying my every movement and breath.

 

I drag my feet in shame to the door as the doctor greets me with a friendly smile and, "Hello Danny." I give a small weak smile back as I allow a tear to fall down my pale cheeks. "Ok Danny right this way." He states pointing down the hall, thankfully not picking up on my red and watery eyes. 

 

I walk in as I rub my hand over my arm and shiver at the cold, depressing, plain room. I drift over to the Hospital bed with a thin layer of paper spread over the top for patients after me to have a more sanitary room. I study the plain white tile floors, a very small, dim window, and piles of paperwork.

 

I begin to discover, this was my future. This is what I have to look forward to every couple weeks. I get to come in this awful depressing room and have all of my hurt and hopeless thoughts come rushing right back into me.

 

"Ok, so how are you Danny? How do you feel?" The doctor questions well sliding his chair from under his desk and pulling it under himself as he sits down crossing his ankles. "Umm okay? I guess..." I reply not acutely having the knowledge myself.

 

He nods scooting closer to me. "Any symptoms, head aches, diarrhea, nausea, vomiting, or cramps?" He asks clicking his pen ready to begin writing. "Ummm.. lots of miner headaches, and little vomiting, and little cramping." I state.

 

I crack my knuckles, attempting to distract my self from the painful scene. "Alright well I know you already filled out all the paper work but, I am going to have you fill out this simple form before we get started."

 

I nod as he scoots himself over to his desk, and opens a medical program, probably to record his patients on their feedback... my feedback. I look at my paper as I click my pen up and down creating a clicking noise distracting me once again, discovering the doctor very annoyed by the gesture, so I decided to actually start to fill out the form.

 

I answer each question to the best of my abilities. I didn't understand 90% of the text, but I tried my best to interpret and answer clearly and professionally as possibly. I fill out the paper and it didn't really ask anything that affected me, untill I flipped on to othe back. I come across to a question that I begin to come completely affected by, even though on like to others the text was completely understandable and answerable.

 

 

Do you have knowledge of the male who is responsible for your pregnancy? If so please list his name below.

___________________________________________________

 

I freeze, biting my lip as the question brings back every piece of hurt I possessed from Jordan, the pain I had tried so hard to forget.

 

I sat in silence for a moment building up the courage to ask the doctor about the question before, luckily, he cut me off. "Are you confused on one of the questions Danny?" The male doctor asks in concern.

 

I breath heavly as I reply nervously, "Ummmm, what if you can't answer this?" I ask raising a eyebrow at him as he nods. "You can leave it blank." I could tell by the way he tensed up and glanced at the picture on the wall of a young girl around my age occasionally, that he was very unpleased. I knew it was only his fatherly instincts and role coming out into play by him picturing me as his daughter, I assume. If only he knew how I became this way.

 

I nod as thoughts dance around in my head.

 

I hand him the form and we offically begin my first pregancy appointment.

 

The start of it all the day the new period of time in my life will start. The day that I will never, ever be the samagain. 

 

First the doctor asked about the date of my conception, which was the one question that I was affected by. Because clearly all of the pain I felt that date. All of the memories flashed back in my mind, forcing me to shiver and receive cold goose bumps all over my body.

 

I tried my best to move on after I answered the devastating question and continued on with the appointment, blocking he previous emotions out of my mind.

 

Next he asked about my health and medical history, as well as as my medical history of my family since that could affect my pregnancy (allergies, genetic conditions, etc).

 

He then had me tell him around how much I wayed before I was pregnant and then weighed me and recored it so further on he could compare and average the two.


Following several blood tests where taken, allowing him to check : 

- blood group and Rhesus status

- rubella or German measles status

- iron levels.

 

I was also screened for HIV, syphilis and hepatitis B. 

 

After he asked if I wanted the baby to be screened for Down’s syndrome, spina bifida, and hemoglobinopathies, for example sickle cell or thalassemia.

 

He also asked to check for the presence of albumin and sugar, and to detect any risk of diabetes, infections or kidney problems.

 

I agreed to both. Even though I was completely confused by every word he spoke not understanding any of the medical information or context, but was forced to just go along with it knowing he also knew was only a frightened teenager.

 

I sat quietly most the time dwelling in my hopeless and dark thoughts, about my life from now on, besides the  occasional questions the doctor asked attempting to not only make the scene less awkward but to try to calm me down so I wasn't as nervous as I was.

 

I just felt as If I was in a dream and not even physically there.

 

I felt as if any minute my mom or... Liam, would come running in and pour water on me to wake up. That I would run down staris hurry eat breakfast and run off to Liam's house... Liam.

 

But when in reality, My mom freaking kicked me out, and Liam is sleeping with one of my best friends, and I'm I the freaking hospital pregnant for gods sake!

 

I ponder my thoughts more as I question myself about Liam, but more importantly why he wasn't here. He wasn't the one to not help me in time of despair and need, But I mean face it Danny Liam does alot of things now.... that he wouldn't have done before......

 

The doctor taps on my shoulder catching my attention, "Danny, would you like me to give you an ultrasound scan of your baby?"

 

I gasp at his choice of words "your baby"

 

I don't think until just know that I realized that this was m-my baby, it was in my stomach, living inside of me, who I am responsible for...I was responsible for not only my life but theirs too. How could I possibly be able to take care of someone else if.. I can't even do the same for myself? I run my fingers through my hair as I tightly grip my scalp, bursting into tears.

 

The Doctor goes pale as he asks kindly, "Danny, why are you pregnant?

 

I furrow my eyebrows in confusion. He threw me completely off. "W-what?"

 

"Danny, are you planning on keeping this baby?" He asks randomly and full of concern, accompanying the forst question by completely throwing me off once again. 

 

I widen my eyes never... even connsidered keeping or giving up the baby... my baby.

 

I shake my head as tears begin to stream down my face. I had not once even had the subject dabble into  my mind. I also had no answer, well feeling so alone and broken, so different. As if i wasn't even the same girl I was 3 months ago. 

 

"Danny are you alright?" the doctor asks raising an eyebrow braking the silence I had created making it build up in the depressing room.

 

"GOD DAMN IT NO! I'M ONLY FREAKING 17! I SHOULD NOT EVEN BE HERE! I DON'T DESERVE ANY OF THIS SHIT!" I  say as his eyes widen as he softly replies, "I will go get your friend." Probably knowing exactly what o do in a situation like such having a teenage female in his life.

 

I barley even heard him as I went into a stage of reality of what was actually happening.

 

I shake as I scream and cry letting go of all of the shame and pain I felt. I put my hands over my face as I suddenly hear Maya's soothing voice. "Shhhhhhh Danny, I'm here. Your going to be okay. This is all going to work out, okay?" I shake my head in disagreement as she wraps he arms around my and asks the doctor, "May we leave?" He nods once again knowing that I needed that being in such an emotional state.

 

Maya helps me down from the counter as she puts her hand around me and helps me walk down the hall and back into the waiting room. Maya swiftly walked over to the front desk as she received multiple papers nad a wave goodbye from the secretary and walked back towards me.

 

I shake my head as my eyes fill with water knowing she didn't deserve any of my shit. I hated my self for having to put her threw all of this... All of my god damn crap.

 

I bite my lip as I attempt to hold back the rest of my tears, back not wanting her to have to see or deal with them EVER again.

 

We walk out into the parking lot as I wipe the makeup from under my eyes and sniff as I enter the car. "Danny you will make it through this. I promise." Maya says attempting to comfort me as she  backs out of the parking spot also holding back her tears.

 

We pull out of the  parking-lot and onto the busy street as the entire ride home the same words replay in my wrecked mind. "Are you planning on keeping the baby?" I shake my head needing advice, help, input, suggestions... a answer.

 

As finally get the guts I ask maya in complete and utter despair and betrayal, "Should I keep or give up... my baby?"

 

 Harry's POV 

 

"Liam... come on you haven't talked to me all day..." I nudge him on the shoulder with my enclosed fist. Actually, he hasn't talked to me all week, since the party. Hell I probably wouldn't talk to myself if the bombshells such as the ones I told were dropped on me. But then again, most of them were about me, and I was aware of them for years. Except Danny being pregnant of course. I still can't wrap my mind around that! How could someone so innocent like Danny have that kind of secret?? Maya certainly isn't as innocent and she probably wouldn't-- No Harry you're trying to get your closest friend to talk to you again not thinking about you ex-girlfriend. 

 

"Liam don't be a fucking prick. Talk." I furrow my eyebrows, folding my arms to restrain my anger. 

 

"You shouldn't have taken advantage of my friends and made them do all those horrible things." He snaps, catching me off guard. He looks just as angry as I am.

 

"They chose to be a part of it!" I fire back, defending the past. 

 

"Yeah, and they had no idea what they would have to do. You played with Maya's heart for god sakes Harry! You played her like a fool and threatened to kill her!" His response caught me completely off guard again, not being familiar to this particular side of Liam. 

 

"Yeah well you did SOO well with Danny! 'Lets just go let my best friend who I could be in love with get knocked up with the town arsehole and then dump her in the garbage while I fuck her friend! Oh wont that just be such a great idea!'" I retaliate, smirking a little. He clenched his fists until his knuckles are white as snow, worrying me of what might happen because of my jackass behaviour. 


"Shut the hell up Styles! At least I didn't fuck one of my best mate's close friends, make her falling in love with me, then almost shoot her in the head all because of some damn money someone took!!" I narrow my eyes, jaw tensing in anger. 


"Payne what you did is so much worse. At least I didn't send some stupid mixed signals to the girl I love, let her slip through my fingers, move on with her close friend while she is abused and fucked by some dick, then watch as she gets knocked up and help by beating the shit out of him only to go back to the girl I don't love." I spit, eyeing him intensely. As soon as the words were said, his fist connects with my face. I am forced back a few steps due to the blow, but quickly snap back with a right hand to his gut. He tackles me, throwing punches angrily. And I let him. I've been nothing but a jerk to him even when he's been great to me. And what I had said, was completely uncalled for. But he also shouldn't have said what he said! No matter how true the statement was, I can't believe it; I don't want to believe that I could've killed her. Me! Kill the one girl I was in love with! The thought of actually doing it, her lifeless body in my arms after I shot the trigger myself.... I wouldn't have been able to live with myself if I had done the unthinkable. After the pain really starts to kick in, I shove him off as if he was just a fly. I throw in a punch or two before I restrain myself and spit, 

 

"For the record, Maya and Reagan happen to be in trouble with Jake too. He's been watching their every move as well as mine Liam, he knows who Danny and Ava are, who all your little friends are. So if you think that yelling some shit at me about how I should stay away from all your friends when I'm actually the one trying to protect them, you can go to fucking hell." I storm off, slamming my car door in a fit of anger. I clench my fists angrily, trying to breathe before picking up my phone and dialing Danny's number.

 

***Danny's POV*** 

"I'll be down in my work out room." Maya drops in the living room to tell me. Her raven colored hair is in a tight ponytail with a bright blue headband to pull the rest of it back. Her neon blue tank top is gripping to her curves and her tight black pants would leave a normal person very uncomfortable. But then again, we are talking about a girl who kept the fact that she was trained to kill people a secret, she's bound to know how to handle uncomfy clothing. 

 

"You have a work out room??" I ask, raising an eyebrow and lifting myself off the couch. 

 

"Yeah, where else would I go to relieve stress or work out?" She asks as if it was the most stupid question for me to ask. 

 

"Can... Can I see?" This is the only room I was never introduced too in all the years I've known Maya. 

 

"..Fine." She walks down the hall, not waiting for me to catch up. She opens the locked basement door and turns on the light, quickly descending the stairs to turn more on. She waits for me to follow as she puts her hands on her hips. 

 

"Woah." I widen my eyes, seeing the biggest basement I've ever seen.

 

Every inch of the wall was covered, either by weapons and weights or mirrors and rails. In the middle are all sorts of equipment, except the back part of the room; it was all mats on the ground. That must be where she practices her defense skills and, and killing, if she still does practice that.

 

"Maya are those... You know... For killing people??" I ask timidly, nodding at the foreign objects. She snorts, rolling her eyes. How did I not see this side of her before? She was always so open, so carefree. But maybe that's just a mask; she was so locked up that she had no choice but to act that way. 


"No D. They're strictly training. Well unless you count the range in the back of the room." I raise an eyebrow as she leads me to a set of switches. She flicked one up with her forefinger, picking at her nails in boredom as a noise comes from the walls. A set of targets appear on the wall, along with the scattered ones all alone. A small drawer opens up after she punches in a code and inside are a row or two of weapons such as knives and guns. There are enough to supply a small group, yet it is only for her. She grabs a pair of giant headphones and gives me them. She then swiftly turns and shoots directly at the bullseye of the target across the room, hitting the corner of the red bullseye. I gasp as she curses, whispering,


"Off my a centimetre..." 


"Off??? That wasn't off! You didn't even aim!" I put my hand on my forehead and almost laugh. 


"Danny, we both know it isn't good enough. I've been practicing everything for almost two whole years after... After my job. It wouldn't be good enough." She says, obviously strained on the outcome. I want to comfort her, but how can I? We are so much different than I thought. 


"Could you just, go up and let me alone for a little while? I need to be alone." I nod once, hesitantly putting an arm around her in a half embrace before jogging up the stairs. I don't hear any shots go off downstairs; I'm glad she isn't practicing her aim again. I go to the fridge after a whole and take some leftover pizza to eat while I watch a movie. I notice Maya go upstairs to her room about an hour into the movie; I decide its best to let her come back down if she wants to. With all the things she had explained earlier today, I kind of want to punch Harry like she did. Yet I want to help Harry and try to get his side. Maybe he had to or they would've killed her instead! I just wish someday, maybe she could finally move on. And maybe I can too, from Liam. Wait Danny what are you saying, you never had him in the first place. 


"Hello?" I say into the phone when it begins to ring. 


"Danny, it's Harry." His dark raspy voice vibrates in the phone, making me shiver and look down at my stomach for some odd reason. 


"Hi." I respond, glancing up at the empty stairs. 


"Um... Liam and I, got in a little fight. Do you think I can stay with you? I was staying in Liam's guest room, but that won't be welcome to me anymore, for now at least." I bite my lip. What should I say?? Maya will go apeshit if she finds him here. But, he sounds like he has no where else to go. 


"Um, yeah you could stay here for a while. I guess. But if M kicks you out I'm just saying her power overrules mine." I nervously chuckle, unsure if this Ida good idea or not. He is silent on the other end for a while before he lowly states,


"Be there in 5." He hangs up and I sigh. Maya's gonna be overly pissed at me. Like 'I'm gonna freaking kill you with one of my several guns or weapons downstairs and laugh about it after' pissed. I know she is not on good terms with him, she hasn't even been the same since her party! She seems less, energetic and witty and more dull and lifeless; depressed even. 


"Danny!" A voice comes from the ajar door, the figure's hand pushing it open a little more. 


"Harry, come on in." I say simply with a small smile before he cautiously closes the door. 


"Hey Danny I am in the mood for a little night out, wanna come? I got dressed for occasion." Maya smiles, showing off her nice long legs with a short black dress and heels. Her hair didn't even need to be done, it was already perfectly curly. Damn I wish I could pull off half the stuff she can; especially now that I'm blowing up like a ballon! But her smile wipes off faster than it appeared when she met eyes with the curly haired boy next to me. 


"Maya, he hasn't got a place to stay, Liam and Harry got in a fight and-" 


"Who the hell are you to invite him over to stay as a GUEST at MY house??? Danny I Told you everything between him and I at the appointment, you should be on MY SIDE. Not his. You live in my house for fuck's sake! I thought we were getting past this and getting closer-- my god I let it happen again! I let you in, I told you everything, EVERYTHING, and you turn out to be just like him! You turn your back on me! I wouldn't be surprised if the two of you are together or even planning to finish what this arsehole tried to-" 


"MAYA! Stop it! Please, can't we just talk it out??" I say anxiously, not wanting her to boil over or break down. 


"Danny, it's fine. Maya, darling please calm down. I know I hurt you, you can take it all out on me. Later. But we can't hash it out in front of Danny, that's not fair to any of us-" 


"-DAMMIT HARRY! YOU DONT CALL ME DARLING FOR GOD'S SAKE! YOU DONT GET TO CALL ME ANYTHING!" Maya clenched her small fists, probably wanting one of her guns right now, or maybe a knife. 


"Fuck the two of you, I'm leaving for the night. Danny you can have him over for all I care but I need him to be gone by the time I come back." She storms past us, shoving Harry on the way. 


"Where are you going?" He asks concernedly, yet with a playful smirk and a charming attitude. 


"To get wasted and screw around with a bunch of guys who won't even know my name." She sneers in his face, yanking her clutch off the desk and slamming the door. Harry stays silent in thought for a bit, making me the one to break the silence. 


"She'll be fine." I excuse, sighing and shaking my head in disbelief over what had happened. 


"No. No she won't. She'll never be fine. Not after everything." Harry sighs back, rubbing his eyes in exhaustion.

 

"Should we go after her?" I ask, unsure of how to handle her. 

 

"No, if she doesn't come back in 3 hours thats when we need to start looking for her. We should let her calm down a little though." 

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