the blood

my feelings

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2. About a year later

I'm now 16 and I weigh 280 ish my life feels worse. Reason? I'm a drop out pretty much I'm going to be studying for my GED the friends I did have are gone and I face the future  of being my mom who by the way I don't want to go down that road she says it humbled her and I would be lucky to go down the same road she doesn't realize I'm a nice person here's an example I see an old lady and a bunch of grocerys I'll help or I see a baby crying I make funny faces I cheer them up. An example from a couple years ago a friend was getting made fun of by high schoolers for being gay I stood up for her and told them to back off the next year she's still gay has a gf and I get made fun of she sees and says nothing I see her the following day and say hi she simply ignores me.

  I understand I'm not the only one and many people have it worse but I understand also that people out in the world wold welcome me with open arms and those people I will meet but I'm afraid that if I don't meet them soon I'm never going to make it to 18 every day it gets a little harder to get up lately I've been sleeping more cause I've got nothing else to live for except that promise and I've even thought of breaking it but I haven't it's getting harder and harder if anyone feels the same or hell just wants to talk I'm a great listener if I can help others I feel so much better that someone is going to get through even if I can't 
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