Where Did I Go Wrong

the "Inspired By A Song" competition. My story was inspired by the song "How To Save A Life" by The Fray. My story is about a girl (Dawn) struggling to fight depression and her best friend (Caelan) who is trying his hardest to understand her and help her through it. Life is full of ups and downs, some people experience it more than others. But that is why we have to find a way to get through it.
“By letting it go, it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try, the world is beyond winning.” -Lao Tzu

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5. One Of Two Things

"I'm sorry Caelan. But I'm just not the same. I've never been the same ever since the car crash. You would be exactly how I am right now if your whole family died. You don't know how it feels to be this lost. I'm so lost in my own thoughts that I can't even think straight sometimes. This is what I have to do. I hope you understand."

I push past him and walk out of the bathroom. I walk downstairs and go towards the front door with my music and a razor blade in my pocket. 

If I can't do it here, I might as well do it somewhere else.

I open the door and run outside into the street. I can either run down the road, or straight in the forest. Caelan has less of a chance finding me in the forest, so that's where I go.

As I run away, my eyes blurred from the tears, but my hearing as keen as ever, I can hear Caelan calling my name. I hope he doesn't catch on and follow me. I want to be alone more than ever right now. 

I can feel myself sinking deeper into my pit. 

I feel so low. 

I might as well die. 

I am running so fast that I trip and fall. I recover quick from the fall and lean against a tree. 

I rip my headphones out and throw them and my music as far as I can. 

I take the blade out from my pocket and hold it against my wrist for a moment, hesitating, before I start cutting line after line across both of my wrists. 

Blood is rushing out of my arms like a waterfall. 

It's never been this bad before. 

I can feel my body getting weaker and weaker as the seconds rush by. 

I try to stand up, but I only stumble and fall down on my side. 

I can't stop the bleeding. 

My vision is shifting in and out of blurriness, but I can see a figure running towards me as fast as it can. 

I look at my wrists, but all I can see is red. I'm already slipping away. I close my eyes and think of my days before the crash. We would all sit on the couch, watching movies together. They were usually comedies. I remember all of us would laugh at the same time. We were such a happy family. 

I hold onto to that thought as long as I can, until my brain is so clouded I can't anymore. 

The last thing that I saw was Caelan kneeling beside me, speechless. 

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

And then, darkness. 

 

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