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Just whatever rants come to mind. This seems to be a great way to vent.

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25. Mickey Mouse Was A Lie

Well, I'm too lazy to check if I've published this before, so I apologize if I have. But I found it hiding in my writing folder, and found it amusing all over again. Now, this is my true experience, and I don't wish it on anyone.

 

Mickey Mouse Was A Lie

 

                Do you remember those black-and-white cartoons with Mickey Mouse driving a boat, the cute little polka-dotted dresses that Minnie wore? They were all lies. Walt Disney betrayed us. All these years later I have to wonder, couldn’t he be the creator of Denny Dog instead? Dogs are after all, man’s best friend.

                The episode I’m about to tell you reminds me of the time I conducted an experiment and disproved the existence of the Tooth Fairy. Yet this experience was far more hair-raising. I spent the night at my grandparents’ house recently. Because it’s a tiny house that temporarily had far too many guests, I was the gracious one and volunteered to sleep on the floor in the living room (because the couch is definitely not made for sleeping). I was the only one in the room, and at exactly midnight, the squeaking started. I wasn’t surprised, because it was an old house with a giant garden. Mice were bound to exist, and I didn’t think that badly of the vermin before that night. From seeing Mickey, Stuart Little, and those handy fashion-designing rodents from Cinderella, I had myself a pretty good impression of mice.

                A tiny shadowy figure darted underneath the sofa. I ignored it at first, because I did not want to be one of those squealing girls that’s afraid of everything. I figured, hey, I’ve touched a cockroach with my bare hands and dissected it, touched a decapitated arm and handled the stench of formalin. I can handle anything.

                Turns out I couldn’t. The squeaking continued, and it took me a while to go to sleep. Finally I fell into a light slumber (well don’t I sound fancy?), only to feel a small wriggling mass near my leg.

                I screamed. I’m not ashamed of this. If any guys are reading this, you would’ve done the same thing. The rest of the night was spent sitting on the couch cursing Disney for misrepresentation of mice and watching MTV.

 

Regards,

Mina.

 

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