Even If.

"You'd love me? Even if it's not you who I choose?" I whispered to him.
"Even if," he swore.

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15. Eleven.

Song of the chapter: All I Want for Christmas is You by Michael Buble. Press play when you see the # sign!

*-*

"One," Jack began with a spark of mischief in his eyes.

"Two," I continued giddily.

"THREE!" we both screamed before jumping into a pile of snow.

Laughter erupted from both of us as the flurries of snow flew in front of our faces, temporarily blinding us.

"Owwwwww." I moaned. Being the fact that there was only a mere inch and a half of snow and we only gathered a small pile, we basically just landed on our bums. 

"That was a genius idea, Beth," Jack laughed at me. He was either extremely good at hiding the pain or the snow broke his fall instead of mine. Either way, I was envious.

"Hey, that was your idea!" 

"No it wasn't!" 

"Yes it was!" I laughed.

"Okay, it might've been," he admitted.

I tried to gather the snow together with my glove-clad hands into a snowball, but it wasn't sticking so I resolved to just throwing a handful at Jack, and it all stuck to his face. 

Jack's eyes were scrunched and his lips were pursed as he wiped the snow off of his face. My stomach began to hurt due to my uncontrollable laughter. 

"Haha, you're real cute," he said sarcastically before throwing some at my face as well. 

My reaction was the exact same as his as I rushed to wipe off the freezing ice crystals. 

"You think you're funny, don't you, Jackson," I chuckled. He cringed at the sound of his birth name, of which he absolutely despised.

"Yeah, I'm hilarious," he grinned.

"It's good for you that my hands are freezing and I can't feel my fingers, so I will have to get you back another time. When you least expect it," I said mischievously while I stood up and shook the snow off of my jeans.

"Fine with me!" he laughed and joined me walking back into my house.

We walked through my door and I took my phone out of my pocket and plugged it into my Ihome in the living room, turning on Michael Buble's Christmas album.

I took of my parka and mittens, trying to warm my hands up by rubbing them together, but I failed greatly.

Jack stood in front of me and grabbed my hands. He looked me in the eyes as he slowly brought up my hands to his mouth, and he blew into them, just like Leo did in The Vow.

That did the trick.

My hands warmed up quite nicely... as did my cheeks, that were rapidly blushing.

"Hot chocolate, M'lady?" Jack asked me.

"That sounds perfect," I smiled as we walked into the kitchen, while "It's Beginning to Look a lot Like Christmas" played softly in behind us.

Once Jack and I assumed the position- him at the stove making the hot chocolate, because my cooking is absolute rubbish- we began to chat about the Thanksgiving Dinner that took place a couple days before.

"It's no wonder you can cook. Your mom's Thanksgiving Dinner was amazing!" I commented while leaning against the counter.

"I'm really not that good, I'm just friends with the Sorted boys," he laughed.

"Hush up, I think you're great."

"I think you're great," he looked up at me and wiggled his eyebrows. I laughed and hit him on the shoulder.

"Ew get away from me sick-o," I joked. We both started laughing.

"But really Jack, it means the world to me that you let me come to your Thanksgiving. I've haven't had one since I was little, and I really felt at home," I admitted sincerely.

"You know you're always welcome," he smiled and gave me a peck on the cheek before he poured our hot chocolate into our separate mugs. My mug was shaped as an owl and his was a white one with black letters that said "Polyjuice Potion" like in Harry Potter. We walked out of the kitchen clutching our mugs, and sat on the couch. I flicked on the gas fireplace before sitting down next to him.

"I'm super relieved your mom likes me. Wait- she actually likes me, right?" I asked.

"Are you joking? She adores you! She's just a little hesitant on the situation, but she trusts us, and knows we'll be responsible and make good decisions and blah blah blah," he chuckles before taking a sip of his warm drink.

He's so hot.

"You know that we're kind of cheating," I observed. He raised an eyebrow and waited for an explanation.

"Jack, it's November 30th, we played in the snow, we're listening to Christmas music, and we're wearing Christmas jumpers," I said and pointed down at my red sweater with reindeers sewn across my chest.

"Your point is....."

"It's not even December yet!"

"Well we're just little rebels then, aren't we?" he chuckled sexily, setting both of our cups down before wrapping his hands around my waist and pulling me close. 

"I guess," I smiled before we went in for a kiss.

Mid makeout, I realized that in the background, All I Want for Christmas is You by Mr Buble himself was playing.

#

Jack must've realized it too, because he pulled away, stood up, and offered me his hand.

"May I have this dance?" he asked me cheekily.

"Why yes you may," I curtsied before grabbing his hand.

We swayed to the beginning notes of the song, my head resting on his chest. 

"I just want you for my own, more than you could ever know, make my wish come true, you know that all I want for Christmas is you," Jack murmured along with the music softly, and I could feel his warm breath tickling my neck.

I felt a pang in my chest as reality struck. 

I stopped dancing and just pulled Jack in for a hug. I thought he might need one, and honestly, I needed one too.

His shoulder buried into the crook of my neck, and we just stood there for a minute, just appreciating the embrace. There was no sensuality or hilarity in it. We just embraced each other and held each other close, because sometimes that's all you need.

"I'm sorry, Jack," my voice shook, but was muffled, as my face was nuzzled against his shoulder.

He broke the embrace and looked at me as a tear ran down my cheek. He wiped the tear away lightly with his finger and answered in a gentle voice.

"Don't be. This is our fault, not yours. I don't think any of us realized how serious it would get. I just thought I would get to know you better and maybe get a kiss or two in, but now I love you and I don't know what to do about it."

I nodded before I actually comprehended what he said.

"You love me?" I looked up at him.

His cheeks reddened as he realized what he said.

"Did I seriously just say that?" he asked me. I nodded with a smile.

"Yeah, I love you, Beth," he repeated with a small smile, looking deep into my eyes.

"Please say that again," I closed my eyes and nuzzled against his chest again to take in his words.

"Elizabeth Stark, I have fallen head over heels in love with you."

I sighed with a smile as the words began to register.

He loves me.

I lifted my head and pulled him in for a kiss. 

This kiss was lighter, more romantic than our other kisses.

After a minute or two, he broke the kiss off, but didn't pull away. 

"I love you," he muttered before placing kisses along my jawline.

"I love you," he continued down my neck, and I swear I stopped breathing.

"I love you," he said as his eyes bore into mine.

I'm almost 99999999% positive that the world stopped spinning.

I couldn't breathe, I couldn't speak, I couldn't even think. 

His hands wrapped tighter around my back, making us as close as possible, and all I wanted to do was close the distance between our lips.

My eyes zoomed from looking into his to looking at his soft lips and back again, and I could feel a blush creep onto my cheeks, as his gaze never broke. 

Suddenly, he grazed his lips on mine ever so softly and then lifted them again, leaving me wanting more.

"What a tease," I muttered, and he softly chuckled before placing his lips on mine.

The music faded into the background, and all I could hear was the pacing beat of my heart. For a moment, my brain shut down at the pure ecstasy of the moment, but the heat of his kiss energized me, making me refocus on him.

Minutes felt like seconds, but seconds felt like minutes, and my thoughts jumbled together, moving quickly from one thing to the next, yet they always came back to him.

And that's when I realized that I loved him too.

I broke off the kiss abruptly.

"What's wrong?" Jack whispered.

"I love you too, Jack," I breathed out, my voice trembling.

His facial expression changed from worried to ecstatic, and I couldn't help but smile slightly, though my face was still full of anxiety.

"You don't have to be afraid to say that to me, you know," he chuckled.

"Yes I do, Jack," my voice shook.

"Why?"

"Because I love Finn too, and now I have no idea what to do," I admitted, biting my lip.

*_*

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

OH MY GOLLY GEE THAT WAS SOOOOO FUN TO WRITE YOU HAVE NO IDEA!

Sooo... Jack loves Beth and Beth loves Jack.... and Finn. What to do, what to do..... MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Maybe in the next chapter, you'll get Jack's reaction.... BUT THEN AGAIN YOU MIGHT NOT. :)

So, if you didn't notice, there was a big time difference from the last chapter to this one, and I just wanted to let you know that all the way from Halloween to the day that this chapter was in, Beth went on dates with Jack and Finn frequently, but stayed close with her other friends as well. Nothing changed, and NOTHING SEXUAL HAPPENED BETWEEN ANYONE. I'm 14 and I don't feel comfortable writing that kind of jizz, so I warn you now that there will not be any ... "Physical" scenes, if you will, in this book. But don't worry, I'll make it up to you:)

You guys did amazing on the voting last time, so you got this chapter a day early:) Keep it up and you'll be getting chapters all the time!!

PLZZZZ COMMENT YOUR QUESTIONS, COMMENTS, AND/OR OUTBURSTS OF EMOTION. I LOVE TO HEAR IT.

Love you all! Stay safe!

-Hannalizzy

xoxo

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