Race Into The Light

Song: The Fray - How To Save A Life.
After the death of his girlfriend three months ago, Zayn Malik, an internationally famous singer from One Direction, couldn't stop blaming and hurting himself. He fell into the dark hole of emptiness, mourn, and sorrow. His band mates had been trying so hard to help him recovery and bring his old self back, but failed miserably. Until one day Vienna, his old best friend from Bradford came to London and helped him to get through his tough times. Could Vienna bring the old carefree Zayn back and guide him to get out of the darkness into the light?


1. Race Into The Light


I paid the cab then got out of the vehicle and the cab drove away. I stared at the front the building to make sure I was in the right place. Nando’s, that was the restaurant’s name. I entered the restaurant then stretched my neck and looked around, tried to find the blonde headed guy who invited me here.

“Vienna, over here,” I heard a husky voice with Irish accent from my right side. I turned to where the voice came and spotted the boy I hadn’t seen in months, sitting in the corner, waiting for me. His smile got widened as I walked towards him.

“Hey Niall, long time no see,” I said after I placed my bum on the seat. The famous One Direction singer nodded and smiled, but his eyes looked very tired. We ordered our lunch then the food arrived in a few minutes and we started eating.

“Well, I invite you here to ask for your help,” Niall spoke after took a deep breath.

“What’s that?” I asked then gulped my chicken.

“It’s about Zayn. You’ve been very close to Zayn since you were little, and I think you can help him,” he said, mentioned the name of my best friend and Niall’s band mate.

“Help him what?” I questioned.

“Well, you know his girlfriend Kylie,” he trailed off and I nodded. “Three months ago she got a car accident and passed away,” Niall said.

“I know,” I replied in a small voice. Kylie was my best friend. I was upset she had gone, and I didn't want or need to be reminded of that.

“The thing is, Zayn still can’t accept her death," Niall said, sighing. "At the first month after her death, he locked himself in his room. He almost never spoke, only murmured about Kylie and absurd things about her. He barely ate. We had to force him hard to make him eat. It happened for a month. Now he has started to go out, for clubbing and ended up fighting or got drunk. He also cuts and smokes weed. He either yells at everyone or ignores us. He doesn’t go to concerts or interviews, and that’s why we take a break and quit singing for a while until he’s back. We’ve been desperately trying very hard to make him back and cheer him up, but fail miserably. He’s just too stubborn. We’re worrying about him so much, he’s getting weaker and skinnier. And we’ve been running out of idea to get his spirit back,” he explained. He sighed and waited patiently for me to understand the words he had spoken. “So I called you here to ask if you can help him get through his though times, bring his spirit back and help him to recovery. Can you do that? Please,” he begged. He looked so frustrated and that shattered my heart into pieces.

“Okay, I’ll try my best,” I replied, gave him a small smile.




Step one, you say, “We need to talk”He walks, you say, “Sit down, it's just a talk”He smiles politely back at you

You stare politely right on through


“Zayn,” my voice came out as a whisper. My heart ached to see him like that, sitting by the window with his gaze fixed to the outside and his mind went nowhere. His brown eyes were dark and filled with nothing but emptiness. His flat was in a mess, with clothes spread everywhere on the floor and smelt unpleasant.

“Go away,” he spat rudely without even looking at me. From the distance I could smell alcohol and cigarettes. I glanced at Niall who gave me a weak smile, reassured me to go on. I sighed then stepped closer to Zayn, the boy I knew since I was 5, who was now became stranger to me. Completely stranger.

“Listen to me,” I spoke, my voice was shaking. My eyes spotted the scars he got from cutting in his wrist. “Don’t hurt yourself. It’s been three months, get over it,” I said softly, now sitting next to him. With all of my courage I stroked his arm gently. He flinched at the contact, and quickly snapped his arm and slapped my hand off. I looked at him in disbelief, my eyes were wet. He was very strange, I didn’t even recognize him.

“Don’t touch me!” Zayn snapped, looked at me like he didn’t know me. I sighed. Kylie’s death changed him completely. Niall squeezed my shoulder softly. I shut my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose, tried to figure out how to bring back the old Zayn.

“If I jump off the window, I can meet Kylie,” Zayn murmured. I sighed again, and suddenly I got an idea. It was kind of crazy, but I had to try. I took  a deep breath then spoke to Zayn.

“I’m staying here, in your flat, until you recovery whether you like it or not,” I stated. He turned to look at me with wide eyes, astonished.

“No choice,” I said before he could protest. Then I turned to Niall who also looked at me in disbelief. “I’ll go to my flat to take my clothes and stuffs then go back here.”

“A-are you sure?” Niall asked. I nodded and walked towards the front door.

“I can’t think any other way,” I replied then walked out to the street to call a cab.

“I’ll drive you,” Niall said and grabbed his key, leaded me to his car.




I sighed and entered the kitchen. I was so tired after cleaning the flat and I still had to cook for his dinner. I cooked Samosas, his favorite food, and hoped he would eat.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Zayn snapped as he stepped into the kitchen. “Get out of my kitchen,” he spatted and opened the fridge to grab a bottle of vodka.

“I’ll stay here, and I’ll cook for you,” I said whilst closing the fridge door and grabbed the vodka in his hand. I didn’t know how I got the courage to do that.

Zayn glared at me furiously, completely mad because I took his vodka. He reached his hand to take the bottle back.

“What the fuck!” he shouted angrily. “Give it back!”

“No,” I said (surprisingly) calmly. “Don’t drink too much.”

“Who the bloody hell are you, trying to rule my life!” he snarled loudly. I took a step back as he inched closer. “You’re not Kylie so get the fuck out and leave me alone!” he yelled.

I didn’t response. I just stared at him, too hurt to even speak. Where was the real Zayn? The one who was very close to me, who threw me funny jokes and banters, who looked after me when I was sick, who studied together with me, who understood me, defended me, who asked for my advice before auditioned in X-Factor, who was my closest friend. He glared at me, his eyes were burning in anger, sadness, and sorrow. He looked at me like he didn’t know me. Where were the warm eyes that he used to own?

“Zayn,” I tried to speak, but my voice didn’t came out as I hoped. It was husky and weak. “Do you know me?” I asked weakly. “You’re stranger to me. You’re not the same. You’re not the Zayn that I used to know. Now I doubt if you recognize me,” I trailed off, wiped the tears that spilled from my eyes. “You’re my best friend,” I whispered and sniffed.

“Vienna,” Zayn spoke huskily. His brown orbs met my blue ones and stared into mine deeply. His eyes turned softer, slightly before he shook his head haphazardly, and closed his eyes tightly. When he opened his eyes, the coldness and the emptiness was back.

He snarled madly, then threw his clenched fist into the wall, made a loud bang noise. I gasped and watched him stomped out of the kitchen, followed by his pathetic scream that broke my heart into tiny little pieces.


Some sort of window to your rightAs he goes left and you stay rightBetween the lines of fear and blame

You begin to wonder why you came





I saw snapped out of my dreamless sleep by a light shake on my shoulder. I groaned and slapped the hand away, then shut my eyes tightly, laid on my stomach and shoved my face into my pillow.

“Go away,” the pillow muffled my voice. I bet it was the lads, who would just force me to eat and give me speech, like usual.

“Zayn, wake up. It’s 3 in the afternoon and you have to eat," a girl's voice said. Who the fuck was that? It must had been Danielle or their damn girlfriend.

"Leave," I groaned, didn't give any fuck.

That girl didn't leave or step back. Instead she sat on my bed, then massaged the crook of my neck gently. I admitted it made me feel a bit better, just a little. But how did she know that a massage on the back of my neck could calm me down? None of my friends had any idea about it, unless they had been friends with my since I was little.

"Zayn," she called softly. "Please just eat then you can sleep again."

I thought I knew her voice. But that was impossible. She should had been in Bradford, not here in London. Could it be? But I was sure she was..

"Vienna?" I said as I turned around to face my best friend.



Finally he remembered me. I caught a glimpse of warmth and care in his eyes, before it turned dark and cold again. I sighed and took the Samosas, then handed it to him.

"Please eat this, you can't starve yourself like that," I pleaded.

"Go away!" Zayn spat then slapped my hand, caused me to drop the food and stained the floor. I gasped and glared at him id disbelief.

"What's wrong with you, Zayn?" my voice rose, I lost my patience.

"I do what I want. You can't bloody rule my fucking life, because you're not Kylie Marie Lloyd!" he yelled angrily, then stomped out of his room, hit me on the way.

I stood there, crying. I just wanted to comfort him, help him get through this, and cheer him up. Why was he so stubborn like that?


Where did I go wrong? I lost a friendSomewhere along in the bitternessAnd I would have stayed up with you all night

Had I known how to save a life




Let him know that you know best‘Cause after all, you do know bestTry to slip past his defense

Without granting innocence


Two weeks passed, and he was still mourning over Kylie's death. It made sense that Zayn was extremely upset about it, since they were very close to each other. They were like a couple that people dreamed of, the perfect couple. They had been together for two years but never got into a big fight. That was why it was extremely hard to cheer him up, to get him out of the hole of darkness.

For two weeks in his flat I didn't do anything much about him. I just took care of him, helped him when he was hangover, cooked for him, and cleaned his flat. I didn't want to bother him with questions or give 'speech' he would hate, I was just presented there, to show him that I was always there for him whenever he needed me. Since I had been here, he had stopped cutting, but he was still drinking and smoking weed. He also yelled at me, but I kept patient.

"Zayn, the food is ready," I called him who was daydreaming in the living room.

"I don't want to eat," he replied shortly. I knew it.


Lay down a list of what is wrongThe things you've told him all alongAnd pray to God He hears you

And pray to God He hears you


I walked over the couch and sat beside him. I took a deep breath then spoke, "Remember summer last year, when you, Kylie, Mason, and I were having vacation in Bali?" I mentioned my ex boyfriend's name, Mason. "We went to Ubud to see monkeys, then when we were walking a monkey jumped to your back and Kylie freaked out," I said, memorizing the good times. "We assumed the monkey fangirled on you. We couldn't stop laughing until our stomach hurt," I trailed off. I watched Zayn's reaction, his expression was unreadable.

"And the next day we went to Kuta beach. You hired the whole beach for a day just for us to play a silly game," I smirked. "I was in a team with Kylie and you were with Mason," I couldn't forget the weird game we played in the beach. We had to steal the opponent's shoes. The team who collected more shoes would win. The team who lost had to do the dare the winner gave.



Bali, Indonesia, July 2nd 2012.

"Your target is Vienna, and mine is Kylie," I told Mason. "Get the shoes."

He nodded and we started running towards the girls.

Kylie walked towards me slowly, grinning widely. I smirked and approached her. Our lips met as she pushed me against the coconut tree. I spun her so she was the one who was pressed against the tree. I started trailing wet kisses along her neck.

Kylie's hand moved to my abs, and the other one grazed my thigh softly, sent shiver down my spine. Her eyes were full of lust and she giggled mischievously. She kept touching my skin, my stomach, thigh, everywhere but that part. At that moment I didn't care about the game anymore. I just wanted her to touch that part, to feel her.

"Kylie," I moaned. "Please," I breathed heavily.

"Give me your shoes," she growled seductively, made the bulge inside my pants got bigger and bigger.

"No," I hissed under my breath. She smirked then poked my bulge slightly, and rubbed my inner thigh, made me wanted more.

"Give me your shoes and I'll give what you want," she whispered, referred to my downstairs problem.

Finally I gave up. My stupid hormones were going crazy, and I couldn't help it. I took off my shoes and gave them to her. Kylie grabbed my shoes then ran away.

"Wait!" I yelled. "What about me? You said you'll give it."

"Later," she winked then ran towards Vienna who somehow had gotten Mason's shoes. We lost.


London, England, present time.

For the first time after Kylie's death, I smiled, slightly. Not a fake one, but the real smile. Remembering good times with Kylie made my heart warm.

"Zayn," Vienna spoke. "Do you know where is she now?"

I shook my head. I imagined the horrible scene of the airplane crash that took Kylie's life away, how Kylie was suffering until she died. My stomach dropped low and the pieces of my heart shattered into dust imagining Kylie's soul was now trapped inside the crashed plane, her soul was insecure and tortured.

I started sobbing, cried my heart out. She was suffering and I wasn't there for her. I felt so terrible.

"It's my fault," I cried. That was true. "She's suffering, pained," I sobbed.

"That's true!" Vienna exclaimed, made me 100 times worse. I thought she was here to comfort me, not judging me. "You're right, Zayn. She's miserable now," she said, looking at my eyes. "Seeing you like this, mourning over her death, makes her suffer," Vienna trailed off. "She wants you to be happy, continue your life even she's gone. You know what, it's killing her to see you suffering like this," she continued. I gasped.

Vienna grabbed her phone from the coffee table and opened her camera roll then showed me a photo of me and Kylie. We were in Bali, at Hard Rock cafe. In the picture, we were grinning widely, my arms around her shoulder and hers around my waist.

"Look at her face," Vienna demanded. I stared at Kylie's gorgeous face, she looked so beautiful and heavenly. We were so happy, like there was nothing could take us apart. Vienna pointed at Kylie's face.

"Do you want her to frown, do you want her to see you suffering? What will she feel, if she sees you hurting yourself? Will she be peaceful, if she sees you get drunk, shag random girls, cut, smoke weed, or mourn like that?" she spoke firmly.

I screamed, snarled loudly until my throat felt like burning. My heart ached, my chest hurt so bad. My chest rose up and down along with my heavy breaths. I screamed again to get rid of a lump in my throat. My high pitched pathetic scream echoed in the room, made everyone who heard it cringed.


As he begins to raise his voiceYou lower yours and grant him one last choiceDrive until you lose the road

Or break the ones you've followed


Vienna cupped my face in her hands. I calmed down and stopped screaming, my lips were trembling and my whole body was shaking. Her gaze was burning into my eyes, like she could see through my soul and read my mind.

“You deserve happiness,” Vienna lowered her voice. "She wants you to be happy."

"I can't be happy without her," I whispered huskily.

"She's here, Zayn," she pointed at my chest. "She's always in your heart, nurtures you, be there with you, watching you," she said. "She's your guardian angel," she smiled, stroked my cheek with her thumbs gently.

"Guardian angel," I smiled. My eyes smiled, my heart smiled. And I was sure Kylie was smiling too. Finally I walked out of the darkness, into the light.


The end

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