It's Where My Demons Hide (Harry Styles Fanfic)

"I have my demons. We all do. They'll come out sooner or later and now you've seen mine...so if you're gonna go, go!" Harry said in a bitter tone as he sat on the couch with his head in his hands. Did he really want to dismantle everything we have together? Just when I was about to open up to him, before I knew who he really was, he's giving up on us. I stood up and held in my tears. "No, I'm not going anywhere. I can help you fight your demons. WE can fight them with love, by saying there is a tomorrow. We can fight them by demanding people care. We can fight them with resilience. We are all broken and being vulnerable is scary and hard. We hide our demons. We hide things that don’t need to be hidden." I grabbed Harry's hand and held it tightly as his tears fell from his eyes. "Just let me help..." I pleaded as tears fell from my eyes as well. Harry looked down at me and I saw the goodness inside him.
If hate can love, then what is evil? He can love...

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7. Secrets

I dropped the phone when I heard Harry behind me. I didn't turn around, I was too frightened to turn and see him. I heard him walking up from behind and I closed my eyes. I didn't know what he would do. Even though I was falling in love with him already- NO! It's just a crush, it's just a crush it will go away. It's just like all the others, it will go away. I tried convincing myself that.

 

Harry picked up his phone and stared at me. "What the fuck were you doing on my phone?!" he asked. I was too scared to say anything at all. He ended the call and locked it and looked at me. "Don't go through my shit!" he said and walked passed me. "Harry, please..." he shut the bathroom door and I sighed and opened it. He was really mad.

 

Harry walked back to the bed and looked up as he saw me. "I'm sorry." I said and climbed into the bed with him and he said nothing after I apologized to him.

 

This was a total 360 in mood change and it scared me.

 

***

 

Kayla and I were listening to "Gorilla" by Bruno Mars, because she wanted me to hear it so bad and I just decided to come over and talk to her, too.

We sat on her floor and I was listening to the words and it gave me chills when Bruno sang the lyric "I got a fist full of your hair, but you don't look like you're scared." how ironic to say the word 'scared' because that's all I felt, along with feeling something for Harry. I couldn't believe I was falling for Harry, and I don't even know if I should tell him. Harry was a scary person, especially when he found me on his phone. He had his reasons, I was invading his privacy and I didn't mean anything by it. I do want him to know he can trust me, but I was just worried about him. I know now he won't trust me with anything again, I understood.

 

I put down the magazine I had in my hand and looked ahead. Kayla laughed and bobbed her head "You like it?" she asked. I shot my head over to her and stared "Like what?" I asked. She looked around and pressed her lips together and then parted them raising her eyebrows. "The song?" I shook my head, because I totally was thinking about Harry and forgot to listen to the rest after that lyric. "Oh," I put my hand on my head. "yeah, it's uh...great." I nodded and looked in front of me again.

 

"You okay?" she asked and I nodded and fiddled with my fingers. "Remember Harry?" I asked. She nodded right after I said his name. "Yeah, the one who wanted to take you out so bad." I nodded "Yeah, him. Well, I saw him last night." Kayla's smile disappeared and she narrowed her eyes. "Really? I though-" I cut her off. "That I didn't want to?" she nodded. "I didn't. And maybe if you wouldn't of stayed after school for your ''study session'' with your boy, you'd be the one helping me to the hospital room with a busted head and not to Harry's house." Kayla gasped. "No way?" I looked at her and nodded. "You busted open your head? Let me see!" she leaned up and I moved away. "Kayla, that's besides the point here." Kayla sat back down and smiled. "Right. So you went to his house? What is it like? Dirty? He have dead bodies in his basement from his rape victims? A torture room?" I looked at her with a look like she was crazy. "You watch too much movies." I said and she laughed.

 

"No, actually...it's nice. It's just a one bedroom, but nice." Kayla nodded. "You left when you were better right?" I looked up at her and shook my head. "Not exactly..." "RENE'E!" Kayla was about to scold me before I jumped in. "I couldn't exactly leave, he wouldn't even let me." Kayla shook her head at me. "He could of wanted to kill you." I shrugged "I'm here aren't I? He brought me back this morning." she looked away and back at her magazine.

 

It was silent for awhile until she looked back up. "Wait, you stayed the night?" she asked. I rolled my eyes and looked at her. "Yeah, I kinda thought you got that..." Kayla jumped up on her knees. "Oh my god, did you guys kiss?" "We did more than kiss." I replied and she covered her mouth and in a quick motion, moved them inches away. "You guys had sex?!?!" I nodded and tried bot to smile. "Oh my god," she said and moved closer. "How was it?" she asked and I giggled. I looked away from her and nodded. "Pretty good." Kayla still stared at me waiting for more. "That's it? Pretty good?" I shrugged and nodded. "You need to tell me more. Did it hurt? Did he make you cum?" I looked at her and widened my eyes. "Kayla!!" "Well, did he? You can tell me. Girls are allowed to tell eachother things like this." I shook my head. "It's kinda personal, do ya think?" Kayla gave me a look as though she wasn't buying that. "You're always a open person. Now tell me, you slut!" she smiled and I did, too. I sighed and looked away and back at her. "Yeah, he did." Kayla smiled bigger. "Hurt?" I nodded "Only a little." Kayla laughed and sat back. "You're such a skank." she joked. I looked at her and smiled. "I've only slept with him." I replied.

 

Kayla and I continued to look at magazines and talk about Harry. "You think he'll let me do him?" she asked and I faked laughed. "NO!" I snapped. She smiled and looked back at her magazine. "So what did you tell your parents?" she asked. "I was at your house." she nodded.

 

My phone buzzed and it a text from Harry.  I told him I'd be at Kayla's, so why he was texting me, I don't know.

 

From: Harry

Alright. Be there at 8.

 - H

 

I narrowed my eyes and tried to think what he was talking about. I decided to text him back.

 

To: Harry

What are you talking about?

 

As I was about to send it, he was typing.

 

From: Harry

Sorry babe, that was to my friend. I hope you're having fun with Kayla. See you later. x

- H

 

I locked my phone and stared at the floor. "Who was it?" Kayla asked and I looked over at her. "You think your dad will let us borrow his truck tonight?" I asked. Kayla looked at me and was confused, I could tell.

 

***

 

Kayla and me borrowed her dads truck. "Where does Harry live?" she asked and I gave her the directions. "Not very far."

We drove and eventually pulled up to Harry's house and waited a couple houses away so he wouldn't see us. "So why are we spying?" Kayla asked and I looked out the window for Harry's dark figure to walk out his house and into his car. "Because, I need to know what he is up to." I totally forgot to tell Kayla about the whole thing after sex last night.

 

"Up to what?" she asked. I sighed and looked at her "Last night, Harry got a text from someone named Ed, I don't know if it's the guys real name, or if it's code. But he told Harry he had the 'stuff' and to text him when he wanted to meet up." Kayla looked out the front window. "You think he's into drugs or something?" I shrugged and looked out, too.

 

Just then, Harry walked out his door and locked it and then made his way to the car. Kayla started the car and waited for Harry to move up further so we could follow.

 

"I called it." I said. Kayla looked from the road over at me. "Called what?" I looked over "I called the number on Harry's phone last night." "You did?" I nodded and she kept following Harry. "What did they say?" "The same thing the text said. They thought I was Harry." Kayla looked back at the road and kept driving. "Harry find out?" she asked and I nodded. "What did he say?" "He freaked out. Told me to stay off his fucking phone." Kayla widened her eyes and looked at me. "So then why all this sneaking and spying if he's gonna get mad?" I sighed "He won't know." I said. "I'm keeping this a huge secret."

 

I wish I could stop with the secrets...

 

***

 

We pulled up away from Harry in a dark alley and he got out. A red headed boy stepped up and hugged Harry and when he pulled back he patted him on the back. I moved closer to Kayla and she held the binoculars to her eyes. "You see anything?" I asked. "Nothing, just talking." she replied. "Oh-oh..." I looked at her and looked back at the two men. "What??" "He just handed Harry a pill bottle. "What?" I grabbed the binoculars and looked through them. I saw Ed hand him the bottle and then pulled something else out. "I know something was happening!" I was acting extremely girlfriend-ey, but I worry about him.

 

Ed pulled a baggie out of his pocket and handed it to Harry. "He smokes pot, too." I said with a tremble. Harry looked to his right and put them both in his coat pocket. He paid and then hugged Ed again and then got into his car and drove away.

 

I pulled the binoculars away from my face and felt tears hit my eyes. I wiped them away real fast and Kayla looked over at me. She grabbed my hand and told me it was all going to be okay, but I knew it wasn't.

 

There was a tap on the window and we jumped. I dropped the binoculars and looked at the red head man who was selling Harry drugs and pot.

 

"What are you girls doing here?" he asked.

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