yesterday

I don't want to be yours. I don't want to be anybodies. I want to be me. I want to be Boston. I want to forget about the past and live my life. I want to be noticed but unnoticed by you. Leave me alone, Liam, because this time we really will kill each other. Don't try and find me, because I don't want my memories to haunt me like they happened yesterday. Like Hollywood says, two celebrities never make it out alive. And we are the perfect example.

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18. leaving, left, gone

"Oh, I'm really starting to hate you." I pushed my fists back into Liam's chest. "You're nothing but hateful. You have never changed and if anything you are far worse than back at Tomorrowland." 

"At least I haven't changed! You, keeping all these secrets!" He yelled back at me. 

"Me? You're the one, so badass and acts like everything in the world is going your way! Don't fuck with me Liam, you know I can walk right out that fucking door--."

"Go where? I've already found you, I'll find you again."

"What is with this obsession with me?! What if I told you Liam that I never wanted to see you ever again. Place a restraining order on you, kill your reputation faster than you've killed mine."

"Go ahead," he pushed. "Do it. Do whatever you want. Create a restraining order, have me arrested, but the thing is--just like I told you that first day at Tomorrowland--you will always come back to me."

"Why do you think you have this control over me? Your name is carved into my ass, I live in South Africa originally to get away from you. What more do you want? You have won, Liam, congratu--fucking--lations. But this…us…I think we are way past expired."

"What are you saying?" 

"It's time for you to leave, Liam. Go home. I don't know why we keep thinking we're going to work out. It's not going to happen. We will never happen."

"Er," he exhaled and I watched him stepped forward. His hands landing on my shoulders and pushing me back against the wall. "The only reason we fight is because we argue over the simplest shit. We have two completely different opinions that both want to be right. Then at the same time, we are for each other. I would have never done so many things for one girl."

"Liam," I started.

"If you want me to go home. If you feel like my touch is like a stranger's then scream. Go ahead, yell. Make me want to forget about our connection."

He stared down at me for what felt like hours. 

Then, slowly, I shook my head. "I'm not going to scream."

"Okay."

"Liam!" My bedroom door burst open. "Normally I would walk away but I can't." It was Louis. "We need to get home."

"What?" Liam asked as he stepped away from me. 

"Louis, Liam, did you hear about it?" Harry ran into the room next.

"What the fuck is going on?" Liam asked. 

"Simon," said Louis. "He just offered the band, us, a five year contract."

Liam didn't hesitate. "Tell him no."

"We wanted to," started Harry. "Zayn and Niall already signed it. Our visas are being rejected. We have to get on a plane tonight or go by force." 

"They can't--."

"They can," continued Louis. "And they just did. I'll get plane tickets for us. Boston?" He looked at me and I swallowed, nervous. "Are you coming?" 

Should I? I really shouldn't. But, Liam. Maybe I should go. Okay I think I will go. "No," I said finally. "I'm not going." 

"Bo--."

"Liam listen to what I just told you. We're expired. Go home, be who you are and don't think about me. I'm fine here, besides my mom needs me here. Go." The tears were welling in my eyes, but I pushed them past. He needed to leave. "Go."

Within an hour I watched their car leave the garage. Within an hour, I was past tears. Within an hour my mother convinced me. 

Within an hour I was calling Pluto from the agency to get me a private jet. 

I was so stupid to let him go within that hour.

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