Just Stay Positive

Calvin Nicholls is an ordinary guy in not so ordinary surroundings. Living around drugs, gangs and street warfare, it's only a matter of time before he becomes controlled by East London's feared gang leader Leo Curtis. Can he escape the hell he finds himself in or will he sink into oblivion? With the girl of his dreams an innocent bystander, doing anything to protect her will he go one step too far? With backstabbing friends, nonsupporting family and ruthless villains Calvin most do his best to survive the dark underworld and redeem himself and his life.

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1. Part One- The Oblivion

Nothing could stop the psychopathic demons that remonstrated inside my head.

 “He’s dead Calvin!”

 “Never come in this house again you bastard”

“I just want you back… The man I know”

“Come on bruv… Just another snort… It won’t… ” I cringed as I held my head and began tearing at my thick spikey black hair. I was sweating badly and knew I needed to get my fix before my fucked up life and everything in it came back to haunt me.

I kept on shuffling ever so slowly along the filthy, derelict and deserted Field Park Estate. This was my place, escapism and home. The sweet stench of weed crept up my hungry nostrils. The demons in my head gnawed even harder on my damaged fragile brain, which could take nothing more now than its drug. I pulled my hood onto my head, slowly fastening my hands in each of my stained jeans pockets. My heart was pumping rapidly and neck twitching so fast.  I could hear the slow steady beat of a thumping bass from a nearby hellhole, where other lowlife rats cowered, hiding from reality and heading into a world of hallucinations and fake happiness. Nothing could touch them here. When everything in your life was heading down the shitter, you are guaranteed a release in the small estate on the outskirts of East London. I saw the towering presence of the abandoned block of flats where parts of the white bricks were beginning to collapse. Windows smashed and graffiti tags sprayed ruthlessly across its entrance giving the place some colour, hope and a mark of salvation for people like me. I used to have it all and now all I could rely on was this lonely, sad oblivious evil that I’d become entwined into.

“Cal … What the fuck are you doing moping down there for you pussy! Come smoke some of this shit!”

Aaron Smith called me from the seventh floor and grinned goofily, his toothless smile and grimy gums making me shudder. No job, no family, no hope. Stuck with me in the dark underworld of drugs, drink, prostitution, and gangs and fucking street warfare. His cap fitted firmly on top of his gaunt pale face with his light blue eyes sparkling and on a high. His tall skinny frame was filling the open window and his bright blue Adidas tracksuit made him stand out even more. It was because of him that I became involved with Leo Curtis and now stood on this planet a loser. And yet I couldn’t resist what I’d become embroiled in. I looked up at Aaron, stuck my middle finger up at him and headed into my escapism.

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